Some context:
I'm 22 will graduate next year, I have an internship at the moment. I've always lived with my parents in France (safe for when I went abroad for 1 year in one country then 4 months in another when I was 19 and 21). My two parents are together (aged 61 and 63), French is not their native language (they were born in Asia, came here in their late 20s) but it's mine, so sometimes it's hard communicating because we don't have really deep conversations. They have little to no social life (they don't go to the movies or museums, etc.) and they work together in a small shop they own.
She just asked me a few moments ago if I was angry or upset at her, ever since I came back from a 4 day weekend in another country. She says I never ask her how she is, if she (and my dad) need anything, "like you live alone and this house and we don't exist".
It's true that after dinner, I help clean the table and then head to my room, but as far as I recall it's been this way for a long time, so I'm not sure why she asks this now. She also said things such as "it's always your friends and yourself first, you don't care about your family", "the day you have problems your friends won't be here, you can only count on yourself AND your family".
She's often talked about how she feels ignored, how sometime she wants to "live in the mountains" (when it's not worse).
I can give more context and explanations, but so far I really don't know why she thinks I'm so ungrateful or selfish. I've always been very reserved, and I don't express gratitude the way she'd like me to do. She'd want me to physically spend time or care about "the little things" that happen in the house. I think she believes I take everything for granted because I don't always help her, but I just... I do care, but she doesn't know that I do.
As I said in the context, communicating is difficult because I really cannot see myself explaining to her that I'm not as ungrateful as she thinks I am, that I'm just not very expressive. When I told her that I have absolutely no problem with her, that I'm fine and not upset with her at all (why would I be? at worst I'm just tired because of work and bad sleep), she didn't believe me and kept saying "I don't like secrets being kept, if something's wrong you have to tell me".
Absolutely nothing is wrong, actually I'm in a situation where things are really okay.
Can someone enlighten me on this? I'm really at a loss as to what to do/say, and it's making me quite upset.
Thanks for any insight.
I'm 22 will graduate next year, I have an internship at the moment. I've always lived with my parents in France (safe for when I went abroad for 1 year in one country then 4 months in another when I was 19 and 21). My two parents are together (aged 61 and 63), French is not their native language (they were born in Asia, came here in their late 20s) but it's mine, so sometimes it's hard communicating because we don't have really deep conversations. They have little to no social life (they don't go to the movies or museums, etc.) and they work together in a small shop they own.
She just asked me a few moments ago if I was angry or upset at her, ever since I came back from a 4 day weekend in another country. She says I never ask her how she is, if she (and my dad) need anything, "like you live alone and this house and we don't exist".
It's true that after dinner, I help clean the table and then head to my room, but as far as I recall it's been this way for a long time, so I'm not sure why she asks this now. She also said things such as "it's always your friends and yourself first, you don't care about your family", "the day you have problems your friends won't be here, you can only count on yourself AND your family".
She's often talked about how she feels ignored, how sometime she wants to "live in the mountains" (when it's not worse).
I can give more context and explanations, but so far I really don't know why she thinks I'm so ungrateful or selfish. I've always been very reserved, and I don't express gratitude the way she'd like me to do. She'd want me to physically spend time or care about "the little things" that happen in the house. I think she believes I take everything for granted because I don't always help her, but I just... I do care, but she doesn't know that I do.
As I said in the context, communicating is difficult because I really cannot see myself explaining to her that I'm not as ungrateful as she thinks I am, that I'm just not very expressive. When I told her that I have absolutely no problem with her, that I'm fine and not upset with her at all (why would I be? at worst I'm just tired because of work and bad sleep), she didn't believe me and kept saying "I don't like secrets being kept, if something's wrong you have to tell me".
Absolutely nothing is wrong, actually I'm in a situation where things are really okay.
Can someone enlighten me on this? I'm really at a loss as to what to do/say, and it's making me quite upset.
Thanks for any insight.