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My reaction to incels and redpill and my opinion of love in general (I guess it´s kind of a vent)

1004 Views 21 Replies 7 Participants Last post by  lordDandas
Hello, I am an 18 year old guy with Absolutely no dating experience, however, I was deeply hurt by redpill and incels, so I decided I will write my retaliation over here. I know you guys probably aren´t unreasonable incels, so there´s no point in preaching to you. But I sort of wanna make sure I am not wrong. If not then... This is my antitode to the redpill desparity. And also, I just want to say my opinions and feelings about all the redpill content I accidentally consumed. This is my reaction to incels and redpill.
At the same time, I guess I wanna know if what I believe is wrong. So if I say something incorrect, people correct me. I also criticize a lot so, sorry, these are all just my subjective feelings.

Hello, I am quite a feminine guy, though my mom would disagree because I can get scarily disagreeable if someone is not respecting my boundries.
I am not like other guys and I mean that in the sense that I have no interest in having muscles, gaining money or status. I do not look up to masculinity and only see it as the means to an end.
Yet... There is a part of masculinity that I idealise. Or more like, I like musculinity just not the one portrayed everywhere. The only men I respect are my dad amd my older cousin, all of the other masculine people seem just like walking meatbags of insecurity. It´s hard to respect people like Jordan Peterson he lets everyone s*it on humanity´s self-worth and tell people stuff like
,,Female validation is fundemental."
Fundemental to what ? And that is a question. What is it fundemental to, Jordan ? To your ego ?
I believe that if you base your self-worth on external factors you will be inevitabely miserable and arrogant.
I also believe that muscles, money and status do not define a man´s worth but are rather the means to DEFEND what´s worth.

The other time, I had a crush on an introverted girl. Probably an INFP. And now, I am a very feminine guy and have a bit of a sub-conscious misandry, so it is purely my experience that I didn´t want to be Loved back by her. I did not care for her approval. But you know what I cared about ? I cared about her. I was worried sick that she´ll get hurt weather physically or psychicially and I suffered for days not knowing hot to cope with my feelings.
It felt like nothing will stop the suffering, not even if I started dating her. But then I remembered the first time I met her. She´s very introverted so she barely meets any new people and she heard about me from a friend of mine. And since my friend wanted her friends to become friends, she invited us to a meeting without telling us the other one would be there, because she knew that otherwise we would reject it.

So I recall walking into that café, my friend sitting there with the INFP girl and she looks at me in pure excitement and surprise. Well... turns out she was excited about meeting someone new.
After that... It DID get really awkward so nothing really came out of it but... It was an ISFP, INFP and an ENTP meeting so... It seemed we tolerated the awkwardness in a chill way. Well ,,nothing really came out of it" except for my completely irrational crush over someone I barely know, solely because of her f*cking attitude and also the memory of her "surprised pikatchu face"
So when I was suffering later on, for basically no reason as I always do, I remembered her excited face... And all the suffering went away. I was happy, I was satisfied. That face, that excitement... That´s what I want to live for.

I couldn´t give less f*cks about female validation because my self-worth is nearly unconditional. All I cared about was her. And heck... If she wants me to get muscles, money and cars... Then I´m happy to do it for her. But... I also know that she doesn´t want that. That´s not what would make her truly happy, I wanna give her more than that.
A wise man in a World of Warcraft: Wrath of the Lich King trailer once said ,,But the truest victory, my son, is stirring the hearts of your people." and I agree, if you manage to excite her, to make her happy, that´s when you´re gonna become a true king to her. That´s what I believe.

Nowdays, people focus way too much on wanting to be Loved than actually Loving. And why ? Because they keep telling themselves over and over that they are unlovable. It started with men being unlovable no matter what, progressed to men being unlovable unless they get status. Stop telling yourself you´re unlovable.

Besides, why would I want to protect someone who thinks I am worthless at heart ? I have a difficulty respecting people like Jordan Peterson, they tell you to get better otherwise you´re not gonna be Loved... So really ? You take it that without your suit, career, money, intelligence... You are entirely worthless ? Pathetic.
It´s why I don´t look up to any men. Insecurity seethes from them. Except for my dad, my older cousin and... Handsome Jack.

Do women think I am worthless if I don´t have any muscles and status ? If so... To hell with them. But so far, this idea wasn´t confirmed.

You can´t Love someone who´d call You worthless if You were useless to them. It´s disgusting. ,,Get muscles, money and cars and she´ll Love You" Isn´t it common sense that that is just not the case. She´ll be with You cause at least unlike everyone else, You are sexually attractive... But all it takes is one slip and she´ll leave You... Because what have You ever done for HER other than try to earn her approval for Yourself ?

You are all playing pretend play. You preach strenght, muscles, redpill... Without understanding the nuances it takes to get there.
You are merely imitating your ancestors. And it shows.

And what am I ? A pussy... ? Now excuse my little rant here... None respects me, I feel like I am going through a cognitive deterioration and I can´t even put a sentence together real time. I am nothing but a stupid, dumb idiot who was always nothing but a burden.
Who am I to talk about this issue ? None respects me, everyone resents me and they don´t allow me to be around them. They gatekeep everything from me, they laugh and me and they mock me.
And yet, I feel like I am right. I don´t care about their insults and my self-worth remains the same. I have nothing to prove, no validation points to collect, no girls to exploit.

And what´s left is my Love and my will to do Good to protect it.

In a world where everyone believes in unconditional Love, the most valuable thing are other people. In a world where everyone believes in conditional Love, the most important thing is money, and everything else is just the means to an end.

Why do men supress their desire to do Good ? They bow their head and tell themselves ,,That´s right, I am a piece of garbage none wants so I have to make up for it with money and work so that I can compensate for my pahtetic existence." Why is that something I am supposed to be looking up to ?

Also, an important thing about being a Good guy. Goodness needs no validation, it is a self-sustaining force. You do Good because you believe it´s right. It means that no rejection will change your opinion of it. It speaks about your character. Sometimes, women are not interested in a Good guy. But you can´t expect a reward for being Good, being Good is the reward itself. My definition of Goodness is unconditional Love, for myself and everyone else. If you believe in unconditional Love, you will not fear rejection. You can just laugh it off. And I believe in second chances, if a girl rejects me it means that I am not good enough for her, yet. But even if she rejects me afterwards, it´s fine. After all, I Love her and I want to be with her to make her happy, if she knows that for some reason I wouldn´t be able to make her happy, why would I be forcing her to be in a relationship with me ? But... to be honest, I really am the type of guy who will look at my crush getting a boyfriend and go just like ,,Wow, I hope she´ll be happy." yeah... I am kinda... I am kind of a p*ssy in that regard, that´s not very attractive xD But yeah...

Now, I want to make something clear. I know there is a lot of women who are into redpill, too. Women who will look down on me and say that they would never date me unless I have all the things that I say are worthless. They will say ,,That´s just the way it is." And to that I say ,,That´s not the way it is, that´s the way you are." You want all that s*it for Yourself. You want a man that will be able to protect You, not me, I couldn´t care less. So if You think I am worthless without all that. First of all, You are selfish, second of all, we clearly do not share the same values and therefore I´d have no interest in dating you anyway.
I am not saying women would be bad people for rejecting me, I am just saying that you are rejecting me for selfish reasons. Don´t act like you´re a moral authority to me because I don´t fit your standards. You act like ,,Men should be blah blah blah" just because you´re a horny w*ore, okay ? Like, I am trying to say that muscles, money, status... If I have that, I have it for You. If You Love me for it, You only Love Yourself. And sure, if I get lonely, I can live in this one sided relationship just fine, always knowing that you will never really Love me but at least I can get someone I can Love, which sometimes is even a bigger win than being Loved. At the end of the day, I don´t care if I get rejected anymore, I know how to get girls and I know my self-worth. If you reject me... dude, you are no goddess. You are just a random hack that wants to get laid like everyone else does. Sure, maybe I did something wrong that made you reject me but... Who the f*ck cares ? Your p*sy is not the f*cking moral authority over here, hello ?

Or am I wrong. Is it necessary to objectify my feelings like that ? Maybe yeah, maybe Love and understanding is not enough to make one motivated to protect it, maybe you have to take everything away from them so that they get off of their butt and do something.

However, if someone tells ME to man up, I will break their jaw. If a woman tells me to man up, I will turn gay, transsexual and I´m gonna steal her husband and then tell HER to "woman up".

Once again, am I arrogant for thinking I deserve Love even though I am practically useless ? Or are you arrogant for thinking that you can outweight the value of life by materialistic bulls*it ?

In conclusion, none f*cks with me. I am way past tolerating everyone´s bulls*it. I know my worth and I have nothing to prove, it´s up to you to prove I am worthless... Good Luck, you´re gonna die trying. Probably of old age. Or the realisation of what it would imply if your values were logically consistent.

Are women supposed to take your self-worth away and slowly give it back as you do exactly what they want ? If so, I would rather be a woman than a man.

Why do you repress your feelings, guys ? Why do you devalue them ? You are men, therefore all or most of your feelings are exclusively masculine. Treat yourself and your feelings with respect. Everything you need to become a man is already in you.

Though, I am no "real man", I am just an 18 year old who can´t do anything. So, this post is open to criticism.

Chasing girls should be fun, not a desperate quest for self-worth.

I mean I feel like everything I said here is obvious, so why does everyone everywhere keep trying to disprove it ? Or is there something that I lack ? That I forgot ?
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I understand that money and all that jazz is important for life but I don´t want to build my relationship on it and I want none else to be forced to build their relationship on it. I have been happy my entire life and completely for free. I was always given unconditional Love, I won the genetic lottery by a long shot. I never had to lift a finger to get all the affection in the word, so why should anyone else ? I feel sorry for incels and my whole idea is that I want to prove that all it takes for a person to Love you is for you to geniuenly selflessly Love them. That if you manage to understand the other person and to excite the other person, you are gonna have a high chance for a good relationship. No matter the status, no matter anything materialistic.
I know you want to help. I believe you want to do the right thing. But how much thought have you put into the ideas that you think are the solution? You believe that if you love someone unconditionally, they will love you for it. I believe that to be incorrect. I believe that if you love someone unconditionally, it is you who will love them for it. For example. Think of the parent's love for their child. The mother suffers through nine long months of pregnancy, then a painful birth. And that's only the beginning of her struggles as she spends many sleepless nights caring for her infant. And then you have the father. How many fathers do whatever it takes to provide for their infant and it's mother, without any regard for their personal safety or well being.

And then let's think about this. Who loves who more. I mean, sure. Most children love their parents. But is it to the same degree?

In my life. The children who loved their parents the most, also happened to be the children who took care of their parents the most. And the parents who loved their children the least also happened to be the ones who didn't take care of their children.

Conclusion. It is not being loved by others that makes us love them. It is regularly caring for others that makes us love them. Which means that we don't control how others will feel about us. Nor can we hold anyone but ourselves responsible for how we feel about others. It's as simple as this. You want to love your family, or your partner, or your friend? Take good care of them. You want them to love you? That's just not for you to decide. The only thing you can do is make it easier for them to love you. But before you can do that, they would already have to want to love you themselves.

Fortunately, most people want to love others. Most people just make it hard for them to do that because of how inconsistent and easily distracted we are.


I want every man, every incel to get a good chance at dating. I don´t want it to be a competetion, I want it to be more about compatibility. Just get in touch with your masculinity and start using it for other people. I am sure there is someone for everyone as long as everyone does just that.
For that we would need a massive cultural shift. We would have to go from a consumer mindset to the complete opposite where we are happy with what we have. You could marry the woman of your dreams. But reality will shatter that dream when you meet a woman who is more beautiful and smarter than the one you married. And with the current culture, you are basically guaranteed to meet such a woman. And the same applies if you're a woman who married the man of your dreams. Why? Because we discourage modesty. And so you have people constantly advertising themselves to the world. I suspect this rampant culture of self advertising is what pissed you off in the first place.

But it´s starting to seem like everything I´ve believed in is wrong. Maybe it was wrong that I was raised with so much unconditional Love.
No. It wasn't wrong. Your parents did good to care for you and love you. And it's good that from that you took the lesson that you should care for and love the people in your life. Just don't be mistaken into thinking that it means they will love you back. It only means that you are the one who will end up loving them even more than you already do.

But the question is. What about you? You're prepared to love others and that's great. But shouldn't you love yourself to? And if you love yourself, should you expose yourself to someone who will abuse you? Or someone who gives you zero confidence?

I understand that if you are someone who has an abundance of self confidence, then it's not as important to have a partner who is competent, because you can make up for it yourself. But that's the exception rather than the rule.

But that´s the point, I have no self-worth. Absolutely nothing to base my self-worth on other than my looks. So if I started to measure my worth, let´s say, by how much women are attracted to me. That wouldn´t end well AT ALL. I simply can´t afford to feel bad about it, right now. I can´t take their insults to heart, I can´t let their resentment affect me. I have to keep Loving myself, otherwise I will start making my low self-worth everyone else´s problem. I hope I will not end up that way.
The only standard worth judging anyone by is their behaviour. If I was thirsty and you had a bottle of water, would you share it with me? Would you give me the whole bottle instead? Would pretend you didn't have something to drink? Or would you tell me to get lost?

If you found my wallet and it had a lot of cash in it. Would you return it to me? Would you take some of the money? Or all of it?

If I let you borrow my car, would you return it? When you returned it, would it be in the same condition it was when I gave it to you? Would it be in a worse condition? Or would it be in an even better condition?

Already happened xD
How is your relationship with your family and friends now?

Damn sounds like a Fun life xD
Yeah I lost all my friends, brought my entire family into despair and tears and at the top of that allowed myself to be abused. But it was Fun, I liked it.
It's fun in the same way a dream is fun. It only lasts until you wake up and find that your life is falling apart. And you are guaranteed to wake up, sooner or later. Whether you want to or not. And what follows is guilt, shame and heartbreak.

Yeah, I should watch myself. You´re not the first person who lashed out at me like that. I don´t know what it is exactly that has people have such a reaction to me all the time. It happens always when I get comfortable around people. I don´t even know, maybe I do have some sort of sub-conscious arrogance, an asumption that I am just better than other people and ,,there´s nothing wrong with that". None ever held me to any standard, I never had to work for anything, so I guess that even though I don´t really have any ill will, I do have a tendency to disrespect and undermine people and their achievments. But I don´t mean it, I really just am oblivious to the work it took to get there. Everyone is better than me and I wonder why. Now that I´m thinking about it, that is probably why everyone I know resents me so much. Come to think of it, Thank You for making me realise that. I guess that does fit the definition of a brat.
Ahh, I thought all this time everyone hated me cause I´m stupid but it was actually because I wasn´t able to understand their pride, ohh. Is that it ?
This subconscious arrogance is present within us all. Everyone is not better than you. They're just trying to convince you of that, the same way you're trying to convince everyone that you're better than them. We're all guilty of this. Even when we know better, we can still fall prey to it. It's the reason I insulted you. I felt self important. I justified it by reasoning with myself that I'm twice your age with probably twice the experience. And used that as an excuse to chastise you for not showing "proper" etiquette when talking to someone as "important" as me. I didn't even realise it until you asked me what you did to deserve being insulted lol.

Thank you for your response ! It made me act like a d*ck for a while but I guess there was value in it. Hey, would you believe that the people who resent me the MOST are always ExFP types ?
I guess it´s because Te is kind of their biggest pride, cause it´s not fully taken for grated but it´s still something they´re really good at if they put effort. The same way that I am proud of my Ni.
And damn f*ck, I guess now I see why my sister is so damn insufferable. She´s like me but on steroids, she throws ALL the respect for literally everything out of the window. She´s an ESFP.
Sometimes when we meet people who are similar enough to us, we stop seeing them, and start seeing a reflection of what we love most about ourselves, or what we hate most about our selves.

Okay I guess it´s time we get a hobby xDDD
Thank you for your apology, too, it made me feel significantly better. I am gonna try to make use of your criticism.
I'm glad it did.

(Still though, now that my eyes are beginning to open, I am starting to feel like there´s something deeply wrong with me xD)
I can't comment on whether there is or there isn't, but I can certainly relate to the feeling.. All I would say is, don't be too hard on yourself. Use the correct standard and continue to make sincere efforts. Make the wrongs you can make right, right. And seek forgiveness for the ones you can't. And never lose hope no matter how many times you find yourself making the wrong choices. As long as you're breathing, there's an opportunity to do better.
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I know you want to help. I believe you want to do the right thing. But how much thought have you put into the ideas that you think are the solution? You believe that if you love someone unconditionally, they will love you for it. I believe that to be incorrect. I believe that if you love someone unconditionally, it is you who will love them for it. For example. Think of the parent's love for their child. The mother suffers through nine long months of pregnancy, then a painful birth. And that's only the beginning of her struggles as she spends many sleepless nights caring for her infant. And then you have the father. How many fathers do whatever it takes to provide for their infant and it's mother, without any regard for their personal safety or well being.

And then let's think about this. Who loves who more. I mean, sure. Most children love their parents. But is it to the same degree?

In my life. The children who loved their parents the most, also happened to be the children who took care of their parents the most. And the parents who loved their children the least also happened to be the ones who didn't take care of their children.

Conclusion. It is not being loved by others that makes us love them. It is regularly caring for others that makes us love them. Which means that we don't control how others will feel about us. Nor can we hold anyone but ourselves responsible for how we feel about others. It's as simple as this. You want to love your family, or your partner, or your friend? Take good care of them. You want them to love you? That's just not for you to decide. The only thing you can do is make it easier for them to love you. But before you can do that, they would already have to want to love you themselves.

Fortunately, most people want to love others. Most people just make it hard for them to do that because of how inconsistent and easily distracted we are.




For that we would need a massive cultural shift. We would have to go from a consumer mindset to the complete opposite where we are happy with what we have. You could marry the woman of your dreams. But reality will shatter that dream when you meet a woman who is more beautiful and smarter than the one you married. And with the current culture, you are basically guaranteed to meet such a woman. And the same applies if you're a woman who married the man of your dreams. Why? Because we discourage modesty. And so you have people constantly advertising themselves to the world. I suspect this rampant culture of self advertising is what pissed you off in the first place.



No. It wasn't wrong. Your parents did good to care for you and love you. And it's good that from that you took the lesson that you should care for and love the people in your life. Just don't be mistaken into thinking that it means they will love you back. It only means that you are the one who will end up loving them even more than you already do.

But the question is. What about you? You're prepared to love others and that's great. But shouldn't you love yourself to? And if you love yourself, should you expose yourself to someone who will abuse you? Or someone who gives you zero confidence?

I understand that if you are someone who has an abundance of self confidence, then it's not as important to have a partner who is competent, because you can make up for it yourself. But that's the exception rather than the rule.



The only standard worth judging anyone by is their behaviour. If I was thirsty and you had a bottle of water, would you share it with me? Would you give me the whole bottle instead? Would pretend you didn't have something to drink? Or would you tell me to get lost?

If you found my wallet and it had a lot of cash in it. Would you return it to me? Would you take some of the money? Or all of it?

If I let you borrow my car, would you return it? When you returned it, would it be in the same condition it was when I gave it to you? Would it be in a worse condition? Or would it be in an even better condition?



How is your relationship with your family and friends now?



It's fun in the same way a dream is fun. It only lasts until you wake up and find that your life is falling apart. And you are guaranteed to wake up, sooner or later. Whether you want to or not. And what follows is guilt, shame and heartbreak.



This subconscious arrogance is present within us all. Everyone is not better than you. They're just trying to convince you of that, the same way you're trying to convince everyone that you're better than them. We're all guilty of this. Even when we know better, we can still fall prey to it. It's the reason I insulted you. I felt self important. I justified it by reasoning with myself that I'm twice your age with probably twice the experience. And used that as an excuse to chastise you for not showing "proper" etiquette when talking to someone as "important" as me. I didn't even realise it until you asked me what you did to deserve being insulted lol.



Sometimes when we meet people who are similar enough to us, we stop seeing them, and start seeing a reflection of what we love most about ourselves, or what we hate most about our selves.



I'm glad it did.



I can't comment on whether there is or there isn't, but I can certainly relate to the feeling.. All I would say is, don't be too hard on yourself. Use the correct standard and continue to make sincere efforts. Make the wrongs you can make right, right. And seek forgiveness for the ones you can't. And never lose hope no matter how many times you find yourself making the wrong choices. As long as you're breathing, there's an opportunity to do better.
Sorry for a late response, I had a busy week :/
I understand your point. It seems like it was exactly this that triggered the other guy.
I guess it makes sense, though my way of loving is deliberately becoming that person´s most important thing in the world. I said that my way of Loving is about giving people meaning. I see that a lot of people feel like they don´t have a purpose or that none needs them. One of the ways I want to make people feel appreciated is letting them know that I do need them. So basically, if people feel like none needs them, then they are free to come and do favours for me xD I am such a good person.
But see, your point here is kinda contradictory. You tell me to improve and ,,make it easier for people to love me" by doing so but then you tell me that people will actually not love me for the work I put into things but for the work that people put into me. So it´s not just as simple as to just work to ,,make it easier for people to love" us, right ? That effort could also go in vain in many cases. I guess I am trying to go for a more definite approach.


For that we would need a massive cultural shift. We would have to go from a consumer mindset to the complete opposite where we are happy with what we have. You could marry the woman of your dreams. But reality will shatter that dream when you meet a woman who is more beautiful and smarter than the one you married. And with the current culture, you are basically guaranteed to meet such a woman. And the same applies if you're a woman who married the man of your dreams. Why? Because we discourage modesty. And so you have people constantly advertising themselves to the world. I suspect this rampant culture of self advertising is what pissed you off in the first place.
I will say it like this I never liked the idea of travelling. It seemed vein and just as you said, you could always find a better place, better people.

I will tell you this... I don´t want to travel to BIG, GOOD, IMPORTANT places. I want the place I live in to become BIG, GOOD and IMPORTANT. The kind of place where tourists from all over the world will want to visit, for it´s grandness and proufoundness.

And y´know what ? The same applies to people. I don´t want a hot, smart supermodel with a lot of money. I want my average girl nextdoor and work hard, so that one day she will be a hot supermodel with a lot of money. You get it ? I am not a traveller, I am a builder. I want to look at her strenght and at her Beauty and tell myself ,,Yeah, I contributed to this. We worked together to be what we are today." that´s my dream.

There will never be none better at being MY person.

Honestly, I can´t even imagine how would a better woman look like ? A Great personality is something you have to develop and looks never really mattered to me that much. Like as long as you´re not distractingly ugly there´s no problem xD When I was little I had a crush on an elderly woman, I kept opening doors for her saying ,,Ladies first !" and I think I even called her Beautiful.

Besides life is too short to be changing partners like that. Besides, I would only date someone smarter if I was as smart as them. One of the biggest problems with my crush was that I felt like she´s too smart for me. And it was not that I didn´t like that, I LOVE smart people but I always feel like I am not good enough and that I can´t always understand them as someone else could, so for her sake I would rather not date her. If you keep aiming higher and higher you will eventually start feeling sorry for keeping these rockstars around you. Besides, I could be always replaced, too. So as you said you should judge people based on intentions and actions more than anything.



The only standard worth judging anyone by is their behaviour. If I was thirsty and you had a bottle of water, would you share it with me? Would you give me the whole bottle instead? Would pretend you didn't have something to drink? Or would you tell me to get lost?

If you found my wallet and it had a lot of cash in it. Would you return it to me? Would you take some of the money? Or all of it?

If I let you borrow my car, would you return it? When you returned it, would it be in the same condition it was when I gave it to you? Would it be in a worse condition? Or would it be in an even better condition?
The thing about me is, I find it way more easier to give up things than to actually fight for things. If you ask me to give you something at the expense of me having it, I will do it and then I will probably wallow in my misery. I guess I could say that I would probably die to do the right thing. But fight to do the right thing ? Ehh... no. No, not yet. There´s no reason to fight for anything. The only thing I ever felt like really fighting for was that INFP girl´s smile. But redpill has to ruin everything for me. I hate them. I hate this entire culture infact.

I suspect this rampant culture of self advertising is what pissed you off in the first place.
What pissed me off... ?

I was told that women are straight up incapable of love and this was presented to be as a hard fact, will dump you if you cry in front of them, will dump you if someone better appears, incapable of gratitude, incapable of empathy towards men
All justified by evolutionary "science".
I am coming here from the pits of hell.

And who told me that ? An INFJ p*ick named Alexander Grace

I have actually made a video where I attempt to criticize this hell spawn. It´s more than an hour long and even though it´s of low quality, I hope it can make the difference and inspires hope within the victims of this a*shole´s manipulation and gaslighting. But the video says something along the lines of ,,The standard definition (SD) version of your video needs to finish processing before your video is public on YouTube" and there´s no time specified or anything so I don´t know what the f*ck am I supposed to do. But it´s like in my language and it´s phrased kinda differently, so it seems like I am supposed to somehow give my video a standard definition or something. I dunno if I should wait or find out how to do that. I think it was probably a bad idea to make a video but I can´t live knowing that there´s none who criticized this person yet. His comment section is full of hurt people, I have to try to save them.
Apparently an hour long video can take 4 hours to process but I don´t know what they mean by ,,process" are they referring to the same process which is happening here ? I´ll wait 4 hours and then I´ll start trying to make a SD version of the video myself or something. Umm... so I am reuploading it in a different resolution.
You can watch it but it´s long, slow and you´d probably die of embarrasment because I gave no effort into looking presentable. Why ? I dunno. There´s a lot of things I don´t know. But I know that these heartbroken people are desperate enough to watch it. I really count on that. Because if it was a video about anything else than this topic, I would have absolutely no chance of any success with this attitude.
Wait, you can´t actually watch it, I didn´t give you a link. Well it´s not uploaded yet, anyway.




But the question is. What about you? You're prepared to love others and that's great. But shouldn't you love yourself to? And if you love yourself, should you expose yourself to someone who will abuse you? Or someone who gives you zero confidence?
She did give me confidence, it was thanks to her that I learned fluid English in a span of one year. I was top of my class in English thanks to her. Basically, everything... and I mean EVERYTHING that I did or said for the past several years is solely thanks to her. Even this post and everything I wrote in there, I managed to do and think of, only thanks to her. She introduced me to so many things, she gave me so much general knowledge about everything. Actually wait, she also introduced me to mbti. That´s what happens when you have a cold narcisst as a friend. She introduces you to everything without any judgement and doesn´t fear to challange all your values. So here I am, everything I do, everything I am saying, is thanks to her.
At the cost of my social life, friends, family relationships and healthy habits.
She completely modelled the way my life is now. She made me. And she isn´t that bad, she´s pretty Great... it´s just... sometimes she can be very exhausting to be around, I feel like all this is just a result of the combination of our personalities. After all, I did basically do this to myself. It´s not like she was keeping my hostage.
Y´know, what I Love about her is that she´s so non-judgmental. She may calls me stupid but she admits it´s wrong to do so, unlike everyone else. And that´s what counts.



How is your relationship with your family and friends now?
Friends I have non except for my ex. I lost contact with them once I started dating her. Our romantic relationship kinda fell apart when we found out that she´s incapable of Love... or empathy. But still she´s the only person I talk to and hang out with. My family is kinda busy with their issues, for a long time I wasn´t talking to them at all. Now sometimes I am going for a talk with them. But yeah, I mostly just... don´t talk to anyone.

It's fun in the same way a dream is fun. It only lasts until you wake up and find that your life is falling apart. And you are guaranteed to wake up, sooner or later. Whether you want to or not. And what follows is guilt, shame and heartbreak.
I am satisfied with what I got. At the beginning of the relationship I told myself, if nothing comes out of this I will at least know fluid English. Now, I am just a little too lost because I have no social skills. I am proud of her though, she´s getting very social and people really like her but the more people like her, the more she´s acting like a d*ck to me. But now that I´m thinking about it, she´s acting way less like a d*ck to me than she did before. Before it was so exhausting. I am so glad she finally fought friends and she doesn´t have to depend on me.

This subconscious arrogance is present within us all. Everyone is not better than you. They're just trying to convince you of that, the same way you're trying to convince everyone that you're better than them. We're all guilty of this. Even when we know better, we can still fall prey to it. It's the reason I insulted you. I felt self important. I justified it by reasoning with myself that I'm twice your age with probably twice the experience. And used that as an excuse to chastise you for not showing "proper" etiquette when talking to someone as "important" as me. I didn't even realise it until you asked me what you did to deserve being insulted lol.
Hmm... I see. This all really seems somehow relevant to all this, hmm. Yeah, maybe they just don´t know better than me... but maybe they do. This is opening so many possibilities my head is starting to hurt. There is so many things to analyze. Maybe... this actually inspired me to look further into how this whole redpill thing works. If everyone is actually not right, then there must be a really complex reason for why they all believe it. And I´ll take it upon myself to analyze it. Huh... I want to solve this once and for all.

I can't comment on whether there is or there isn't, but I can certainly relate to the feeling.. All I would say is, don't be too hard on yourself. Use the correct standard and continue to make sincere efforts. Make the wrongs you can make right, right. And seek forgiveness for the ones you can't. And never lose hope no matter how many times you find yourself making the wrong choices. As long as you're breathing, there's an opportunity to do better.
Oh I am way too forgiving towards myself. I only judge myself and people by intentions, if you intended or not intended to something... well as if happened. But yeah, sinciere efforts. I guess that´s what I´m going to do. Well, it´s hard when none tells you what to do. Everyone just kind of stopped caring and so did I. So if none cares, why should I care ? I am just gonna keep doing my own thing for as long as people won´t tell me what´s the right thing to do. World is really confusing when you don´t communicate with anyone. You are completely free, you are free to interpret anything as you want because none will ever care. You are allowed to feel whatever you want, you are allowed to cope however you want, you can do anything. I feel incredibely free, completely without rules. There is no right, there is no wrong. There is just me and how I feel. How can I know what is the right thing to do ? I feel like I know but it´s hard to believe it when I am constantly getting disrespected. Maybe I only tell myself that I am right because I see that people are hurt and struggling and I want to take advantage of that to push my agenda ?
And the worst part is, since there is no way I can know what is right and wrong. I have to keep myself to such humility. Because any action I could take could have catastrophic consequences.
Yeah, that´s why I acted inapropriate towards you. I just don´t know. I am completely clueless about everything. I just have no idea. Infact, my most commonly used phrases over my lifetime was ,,I don´t care." and ,,I don´t know." I was kind of a meme because of it. Cause it was my reaction to almost everything.
The reason why I am going against redpill is because I am tired of hopelessness. There are simply things I will never be content with. Good guys are not gonna help me, they are too busy hating each other, resenting each other. That´s why I´m against redpill, I don´t want to encourage hatered among each other. Life maybe suffering, but we have things like dentist for that, not relationships. If Love is not worth fighting for, then may the world burn. I am so tired... of people tolerating that guy.
Simply, if that p*ick is right. Then... I am giving up on dating entirely. Cause like sure... hypergami... but... Women are incapable of Love ? No... that´s not the girls I fell in Love with.
And that´s not the girls that I want to Love. They simply aren´t.
I don´t know, maybe I don´t have a solution to anything but these guys are already so in hell that there´s nothing I can do to make it worse. I want to see the entire redpill burn. And if this video won´t do, that won´t stop me from trying further.
Maybe I am just foolishly immature. Y´know, that f*cker made me hate women. Did I hate them because I am weak ? Or did I hate them because I am not a spineless b*tch ? Because if what he says about them is true, then... what kind of a person would not hate them ? And they approve of it as facts ? And none criticizes him for it ? Maybe women just aren´t for me.
But I know that women don´t deserve my hatered at all. It´s he who deserves it. So why can´t I bring it out of myself ? I just can´t hate him, I guess I just don´t care. Good, cold approach will be more effective. Why do I feel like this just won´t work ??

Dating... my problem is not with how to Love. My problem is why to Love. That´s what they should focus on as well. Yeah, with redpill being true... why even bother ? (I hate him so much)

I think dating could be Wonderful but this guy is ruining it for everyone.
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