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Discussion Starter #1
ENTPs, my more extroverted brethren. Considering that Ne is my secondary function, I figured it may be useful to learn to use it well. My question is, as it is probably the best chance or function I can use for socialization, how do you guys use it that way? I know that I occasionally can get really silly and I see connections (Ti pretty much died), and it comes across to others as annoying. What are you finding connections between, how are you doing it, and what is the best model of use to utilize Ne as something more than simply something that half-works while on autopilot.
 

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Discussion Starter #3
We socialise with Fe. I think. The world is divided into people who find Ne entrancing or annoying.. I don't think it is a primary socialisation tool.
I know that is not its primary purpose, but if Fe seems to be a tool made out of poo, how efficiently could I use Ne (much higher up on my stack) to take its place?
 

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@Signify I used my Fe at an early age to help train my Ti and Ne how to interact socially. I'd say, though, that at this point in time Ne would be my primary social motivator. I don't really know how to tell you to kick it into gear though. I mean it's not like Ti ... you can't really reason with it. There is no mathematic formula to unlock it's power. It's an animal ... not a construct. You just gotta let it loose if you want it to do it's thing. Think of your Ne like a straight from the wild wolf ... and you have it on a leash made of Ti. That's kinda how it works.
 

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@Signify I used my Fe at an early age to help train my Ti and Ne how to interact socially. I'd say, though, that at this point in time Ne would be my primary social motivator. I don't really know how to tell you to kick it into gear though. I mean it's not like Ti ... you can't really reason with it. There is no mathematic formula to unlock it's power. It's an animal ... not a construct. You just gotta let it loose if you want it to do it's thing. Think of your Ne like a straight from the wild wolf ... and you have it on a leash made of Ti. That's kinda how it works.
That's the problem. I have reasoned why it needs to come out so Ti should be leashing it. It is often like how I know I SHOULD be doing something and why....but actually doing it, meh.
 

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That's where the problem is. You see, your doing it out of order. Let the animal outta the cage FIRST, then chase it around a bit to get that leash on (hoping it doesn't maul you). Then let it drag you around like a rag-doll, because it's way stronger than you are, and fight it only when you absolutely have to. The Ti leash just helps guide its direction ... it doesn't actually control it (at least not once you let it outta the cage).

Ti's the afterthought. Remember, you're letting something WILD loose. You either guide it, or you cage it ... but you can't MAKE it do anything :p

You can think of your Ti (with a dash of Fe) as your tools to help you clean up it's mess along the way as well.
 

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Ne is all about creativity and the way I use it socially is by coming up with crazy things to do with people. Ne was also a big help in my improv performing and being good at that got me a lot of socializing at school (theatre was a big thing). So it's less of a way to socialize and more of a tool to get into social situations that others want to get involved in too.
 

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I notice that my Ne is at its best when I just dive right in and wing it. It takes a conscious effort for the INTP to say, "OK, I'm going to completely ignore Ti right now...and just go for it", which basically means throwing caution to the wind. But, if you do it enough times, you come to realize that you really will be OK. Just diving into a situation with Ne can be a little scary, but it always ends up working out - because Ne is very, very good at maneuvering, adjusting on the fly, and finding innovative ways to have fun or do whatever needs to be done.

Actually, those are the times when I actually have the most fun...is just leaving Ti behind and going for it with Ne. I think what the INTP doesn't like about it is the uncertainty of what might happen if we don't think everything through. But, like I said...figuring out what to do next is Ne's specialty...so we shouldn't be afraid of the uncertainty at all.
 

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I guess if you're going to try to use it to deal with people, Ne is what would make you want to be around them because they provide you with more ideas. You have to find people interesting before any of the other social stuff kicks in anyways.
 

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OK
If you can't use Fe (although of course Fe is what to use rather than anything else since by definition it is about relating to other people)...

...but if you can't use Fe, if you must use either Ti or Ne then use Ne. Ne invites others in, because of its "what if" basis. You get to be interested in what the other person thinks of your crazy meanderings and invite them to have a go...that is Ne at its best, or certainly what Ne-on-Ne socialising is, I think.

Ti, on the other hand is challenging rather than inviting. You attempt to deconstruct or take apart the other person's thinking, and many people would find that aggressive if they are not Ti users. The Ti user will just find it interesting.

I tend to match what gets other people going if I can. I have a couple of very S-heavy friends who I used to find seriously seriously dull because they are both very concrete real-world people who just don't "get" flights of fancy. But he is ISTP and loves to get into what-ifs as long as it is about structure, and she is a scientist (ESxJ? and very bright) and loves numbers and facts and being very sensible and so on....and I can relate to her on that intellectual level, the world of logic and straight lines provided by her Si.

Give me an ENFP for banter any day of course....
 

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@Signify I think this is the wrong way to go about this. The way anyone socializes is by being his- or herself. The trick is taking social cues from others and figure out how they're responding to you at any given time. The people that will want to be your friend will be people who want to know you rather than Ne. Just go into it with an experimental. There's no such thing as failure; only results. (did I use that semicolon correctly?)
 

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@Signify I used my Fe at an early age to help train my Ti and Ne how to interact socially. I'd say, though, that at this point in time Ne would be my primary social motivator. I don't really know how to tell you to kick it into gear though. I mean it's not like Ti ... you can't really reason with it. There is no mathematic formula to unlock it's power. It's an animal ... not a construct. You just gotta let it loose if you want it to do it's thing. Think of your Ne like a straight from the wild wolf ... and you have it on a leash made of Ti. That's kinda how it works.
If I'm having a dull conversation, sometimes I take a step back and think of things I could be saying instead, that's were Ne comes in.

As an INTP, the biggest barrier to using Ne socially is knowing it isn't always well-received. When I'm in the company of people open to it, then I can switch into that mode easily. With others (mostly people I barely know) it is very difficult to even try.
 

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If I'm having a dull conversation, sometimes I take a step back and think of things I could be saying instead, that's were Ne comes in.

As an INTP, the biggest barrier to using Ne socially is knowing it isn't always well-received. When I'm in the company of people open to it, then I can switch into that mode easily. With others (mostly people I barely know) it is very difficult to even try.
You see ENTPs tend to have the opposite issue. Our Ne is always clawing to get out regardless of how well received. We gotta force our Ti to keep it in check.
 
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Discussion Starter #15
You see ENTPs tend to have the opposite issue. Our Ne is always clawing to get out regardless of how well received. We gotta force our Ti to keep it in check.
I could say:
x1 ---> Nope, because...
x2 ---> Nope, because...
x3 ---> Nope, because...
x4 ---> Nope, because...
etc.

And thus, silence ensues.
 

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I believe that Ne has a great advantage over Ni socially because it leads people to be more open minded about other people's points of view since it is more open to different possibilities rather than one set opinion. People like people that are interested in and appreciate their views and are not too quick to judge.

I have an INFJ friend who says 'that's interesting' when what she actually means is 'I disagree with you completely but I am too polite to say'. When an INTP says 'that's interesting' you can tell they really mean it, which is great.
 

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I could say:
x1 ---> Nope, because...
x2 ---> Nope, because...
x3 ---> Nope, because...
x4 ---> Nope, because...
etc.

And thus, silence ensues.
Yeah for me it's more like:
**insert least politically correct, but friggin hilarious statement here that is not even remotely appropriate for the current situation**

**in my head** "heh, that was awesome. I wonder if anyone will even get how funny that was? Oh well it doesn't really matter because I think I'm hilarious, and that's all that really counts"
 

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Discussion Starter #18
I believe that Ne has a great advantage over Ni socially because it leads people to be more open minded about other people's points of view since it is more open to different possibilities rather than one set opinion. People like people that are interested in and appreciate their views and are not too quick to judge.

I have an INFJ friend who says 'that's interesting' when what she actually means is 'I disagree with you completely but I am too polite to say'. When an INTP says 'that's interesting' you can tell they really mean it, which is great.
I hope you are ready to talk, because bombarding you with questions may be very likely depending on the subject.
 

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Yeah for me it's more like:
**insert least politically correct, but friggin hilarious statement here that is not even remotely appropriate for the current situation**

**in my head** "heh, that was awesome. I wonder if anyone will even get how funny that was? Oh well it doesn't really matter because I think I'm hilarious, and that's all that really counts"
For me it's I want others to find what I say funny. If I say something funny and it falls flat, I feel horrible about it. why would it be so different for ENTP?

EDIT: Especially the part about caring if other people found it funny. I thought that was part of the extraverted aspect of Ne- wanting to get other's feedback on your idea
 

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I think what @MegaTuxRacer said was the most practical advice. I enjoyed a lot of the other looney conceptions of Ne being used for socialization, but let's think... Taking social cues based on your behavior, understanding their implication, and readjusting your flight path is the best way to go. The more you learn how not to act, the more you learn how TO act - how far you can go with Ne, how soon you can use it with certain people, to what degree, etc.

All of these questions can be answered by starting with a basic framework for socializing, and building on that by trying new things, until it becomes advanced, and you become an awesome interesting dude.
 
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