What I don't understand is why he even bothers to deal with all the insensitive remarks I have to offer.
Suppose you were to find yourself in a friendship like this, what is it that would keep you from ending it? What motivates you to deal with blunt comments and annoying logic, or careless negative remarks directed at things you like, that is, assuming you were in a situation like this one?
Sorry for invading your part of the forum, but I have a question that I seem to be incapable of answering on my own, and unanswered questions often drive me insane.
Throughout my life, I have been called a wide variety of names. Insensitive Jerk, Asshole, Arrogant Bastard, Stubborn Mule; the list goes on.
I am not a warm and cuddly stuffed animal. I am the kind of person who would bluntly tell a girl that her clothes make her look fat, tell an infatuated person that love doesn't make sense, and shoot down optimistic dreams or hopes with cold rationale.
I have a number of friends, but do not trust them. It seems all my life, out of all those friends, I've only ever trusted one.
We've known each other for about eleven years. I don't give him any special treatment and he gets the same blunt comments that others get from me. We have differences and similarities, mostly differences, but somehow, we get along, despite his personality being almost the opposite of mine.
What I don't understand is why he even bothers to deal with all the insensitive remarks I have to offer. I'm not nice and I know it. I don't plan on changing, and he knows it. He dislikes it when I get too logical. I dislike it when he gets too emotional. Yet, he's probably the only human being I could openly discuss anything with. We're more like brothers, and I'd hate to imagine a life without him in it. It's like he keeps me from becoming any colder than I already am; keeps me human in a twisted sort of way.
I don't really understand how the mind of an INFP works, and I would rather not ask him myself, as doing so would feel awkward, so I'm depending on the INFPs in this forum.
Suppose you were to find yourself in a friendship like this, what is it that would keep you from ending it? What motivates you to deal with blunt comments and annoying logic, or careless negative remarks directed at things you like, that is, assuming you were in a situation like this one? Because honestly, this is something I don't understand.
I'm simply trying to learn more about how the INFP mind works, because unlike problems that have structural forms, I find this much more difficult to comprehend. INFPs are amazing. If you actually read all of this, you have my respect. I would highly appreciate it if anyone could help me gain a little bit of insight on the INFP brain. Thank you in advance, and thank you for even bothering to read this.
Don't worry, it takes a lot to offend me. I don't think you're judging me, and even if you were, frankly, I wouldn't care. I'll try to answer your question. I wouldn't call it a habit that turned into a behavior. If anything, I could switch it off whenever I wanted to. I just don't.As a side note, honestly people such as yourself tend to fascinate me and draw me in simply out of curiosity. Usually, I find when someone behaves this way they are intentionally trying to keep people at bay. They don't want to deal with the people surrounding them for whatever reason. Maybe reject before they can be rejected? I realize this is not mere curiosity from your friend since your relationship has been 11 yrs, he genuinely has an investment and sincerity behind it. But for my own self, I am curious as to why if you know the effect your comments and remarks have on people (and I assume in some way you view your behavior as a negative from what you said in your post), why then would you continue doing it unless you are receiving the response that you are desiring? ....alienation in a sense. What do you gain by continuing to treat people this way and be consciously aware of it? Please don't feel I am judging you, I am just wondering if it is more of a habit that turned into a behavior? or if the things you say give you pleasure after receiving a certain response? or are you truly just using your words to keep people from getting any closer?
C'mon, dude, I don't know if you care or not. You're always laughing and deflecting the shit I say with light-hearted jokes. I can never tell if you're ignoring it or storing it away in your head. I'm not going to forgive myself if I you just break down some day or start crying for no reason again.lol I don't care about your insensitive remarks, jayz xD And your logic is still precious and we know it. You know it helped me a lot.
I definitely hope not. That would be gay as hell. If he did, I would be scared shitless from the pure awkwardness of the situation, and his girlfriend would be driven insane.Yes INFP's are amazing. If he's got half a brain I hope he doesn't become romantically involved with you. He likely is warm, affectionate and romantic. You're not and never will be.
You deserve somebody like yourself. A cold, insensitive, selfish person who doesn't want to kiss or hold after sex.