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I'm an INTJ female who recently just got dumped by her ENTP boyfriend. i know why he dumped me, he didnt think it was fair to me to maintain our long distance relationship and I'd been nagging him about it the last few days. i know he still loves me and i love him, and i sincerely want him back. we agreed to still be friends and we've been talking almost like nothings changed (except we're not calling eachother pet names anymore). i want to know how to win him back. i KNOW i can do a long distance relationship, we're both still adjusting to the distance, but i know in my heart that i can do it. And i'd would rather have him one day a month than not at all.

any advice or experience with this type of thing is greatly appreciated. I'm not good with this type of thing. :unsure:
 

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First of all, that sucks, I'm sorry.
But I'm not really sure winning him back is the way to go. I wouldn't want to be in a long distance relationship, personally. I mean, people grow apart.
My cousin was engaged to a guy, but they just went so long without seeing each other face to face they decided they didn't have as much in common anymore and called it off.
I'm not saying that'll happen to you, but maybe try not being in a relationship for a while. Give yourselves time to adjust without the extra weight.

That's really not what you want to hear but if I were in this situation I doubt I could be convinced it would be fine.
 

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Look for the hidden agenda. It might not be the distance: you might just have given him the excuse he'd been looking for to end it.

Sorry if that sounds harsh. But you should consider all possibilities, and if this really is the issue, then chasing him will shut off all communication for good. Playing it cool has a better chance of a good outcome.
 

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I'm an INTJ female who recently just got dumped by her ENTP boyfriend. i know why he dumped me, he didnt think it was fair to me to maintain our long distance relationship and I'd been nagging him about it the last few days. i know he still loves me and i love him, and i sincerely want him back. we agreed to still be friends and we've been talking almost like nothings changed (except we're not calling eachother pet names anymore). i want to know how to win him back. i KNOW i can do a long distance relationship, we're both still adjusting to the distance, but i know in my heart that i can do it. And i'd would rather have him one day a month than not at all.

any advice or experience with this type of thing is greatly appreciated. I'm not good with this type of thing. :unsure:
Just allow yourself to be alone for awhile, and if he really does love you as you say, then you'll probably end up together.

It may take awhile, though. The time that it takes to bridge the gap.

But, you've been talking to him as normal, and that's a good sign. He hasn't cut off from you. If he cut off from you almost completely, you'd know that you wouldn't have a chance.
 

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Insinuate that your are sleeping with somebody else.
I'm not sure if this is serious?, either way don't do this.

Typically, ENTPs aren't exactly the jealous, possessive type, it'd probably just push him to move on from you definitively (if he hasn't already) since it'd look like you moved on yourself.
 

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You can win me back by being a total bitch to me. I take it as a challenge of some sort, what with my inability to maintain psychological distance and all.
 

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Look for the hidden agenda. It might not be the distance: you might just have given him the excuse he'd been looking for to end it.

Sorry if that sounds harsh. But you should consider all possibilities, and if this really is the issue, then chasing him will shut off all communication for good. Playing it cool has a better chance of a good outcome.
I agree with this. If a relationship was worth it to me, I would do anything to salvage it.

If I wasn't into it, however, I would absolutely use an excuse like your ENTP did to wrangle my way out of it without "hurting" someone.

I know now that it's best just to be honest, but I don't think that's common for an ENTP to do in such situations. We like to please people. And we don't particularly relish the idea of hurting someone we care about. So we bend the truth, or exaggerate to spare feelings.

To us it's like we know it's over, so what's the harm in not telling the harsh truth? If we think it could be salvaged, we'll tell the blunt truth so that we can fix it. But we've probably already considered most options and if we've decided it won't work, there isn't much that will keep us around. So we white lie.
 
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