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First question - which function do you think is your dominant function? :p

Second question - which exercise comes more naturally for you to do? Does your feeling work more like in exercise 1 or like exercise 2?

Exercise 1:
• As you come across the action of any mammal engaged in any activity (including humans), say to yourself, "He/she is feeling ______ because he is needing ______" and fill in the blanks. Guess the mammal's emotion as accurately as you can, by paying close attention to every detail of its behavior and trying to imagine what emotion that you might feel if you were that kind of mammal and acting that way. Guess the need by intuiting the inner calling of the animal that is emerging in the way it's responding to its environment, by recalling a similar need of your own. For example, if you see a Scotty dog sniffing around at a new suitcase, you might guess, "He is feeling apprehensive because he has a need to know he's safe." Or you might guess, "He is feeling curious because he has a need to learn all about the world around him." It depends unpredictably on exactly what you really observe. Key is to watch the mammal extremely closely, so your guess emerges spontaneously from empathizing, and not, say, by consciously reasoning on the basis of something you've read. Your guess must come from the fact that you yourself genuinely feel it. It must come from the heart.
• Try the same exercise on yourself at odd moments: self-empathy. Simply monitor how much you like or dislike something, and what in your nature is being fulfilled or frustrated to cause that feeling of like or dislike. Note that attending to your emotion alone is not enough; you must trace the emotion back to a need that is being fulfilled or frustrated. However, if you're having trouble with this, you might try just consciously noting your emotion for a while, as a starter exercise.

Exercise #2:
• Make a list of people you have some culturally recognized relationship with: different relatives, your spouse or boy/girlfriend, your boss/employees/co-workers, etc., and identify your ritual obligations to them that derive from (or define) these relationships. For example, whose birthday must you remember? Who must you send a Christmas card to? How must you dress at different occasions to indicate your relationship to your co-workers? Whom do you call by their first name and whom by an honorific (even "Mom")? How is it made obvious to all that you have this relationship? How would you feel or how would they feel if someone did not perform their ritual obligations?
• As you come across the action of any person engaged in any activity, say to yourself, "he did ______ because he wants to show ______ relationship." For example, if a man tips his hat to a lady, say to yourself, "He tipped his hat to her because he wants to show that he is loyal to her." If a woman quotes Proust in a conversation, say to yourself, "She quoted Proust to show that she wants to be seen as the expert and she wants others to defer to her authority." This can get very complex and tricky. For example, what does it mean if someone doesn't show up at your baby shower? Does that show that they don't consider you an important person in their life? If a friend you haven't seen in a long time addresses you as "Mr. Tibbs" (assuming your last name is Tibbs), what does that show about your friend's understanding of your friendship? That's an awfully formal way for friends to speak, so it seems like a cold gesture, aimed at showing that he wants to keep you at a distance. See any Seinfeld episode for lots more analysis of this kind.
• Try to get someone to treat you a certain way that defines a role for you. For example, try to get someone to treat you like royalty, or like a disposable slave, or like an expert authority, or like an eager student who wants to learn from them. You will have to, in some way, define a complementary role for them at the same time, through your actions. You can't ask explicitly that they treat you that way, except as a very last resort. You have to get the mutual roles going by, in effect, painting them in the complementary role first so they find themselves naturally playing along and painting you in the role you want. You may find that it's tricky to get painted in a positive role, but it can be done if you give the other person a complementary role that they really like. In effect, an implicit contract is created: you paint them in a role they like, and they paint you in a role you like.
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