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MOTM Nov 2010
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I find that when I meet someone, I really like to get inside of them and see what makes them tick. I think of it as "cracking people open". I really like to do this and it is not hard for me usually.

I really only have one experience when someone wouldn't let me do this. It was my taxi cab driver. He did not let me get to his core. He was listening to a football game in his earpiece or something when he was driving and he just wouldn't budge. I was dumbfounded. Lol. It really frustrated me. My boyfriend at the time was in the cab with me and laughing at me. This man would not indulge in conversation. Time was working against me as we were only traveling a couple of miles. Our destination was quickly approaching. Yet, I was taking this man's indifference like a slap in the face. I remember saying things like "But you don't seem to understand. Everyone talks to me. Everyone likes talking to me." Hahaha. This is like the only time I can think of where I hit a wall. So I had to use ridiculous behavior and say ridiculous things in return.

But usually it is really easy for me to crack people open. I don't have to tap too hard and everything usually just spills out from them. Many times I don't even need to tap. They just freely spill.

I love figuring out people so I can tell what they may need to hear in order to make their lives more balanced. It's not a good day when people like Mr. Taxi don't open up. Haha. :crazy: I mean, how am I going to leave them with specially tailored words of inspiration if they won't open? People like closed-core-taxi-cab-drivers frustrate my mission on this planet. :frustrating:

Do any of you feel like you need to get to the center of people? Do you need to get to their cores?
 

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YES!!!
I keep seeing all these posts about ENFP's being flaky. Ok so I agree that I 'know' a lot of people ... but truly knowing them is another thing. I love having really deep conversations with people, understanding what they're all about.

The #1 way to drive me insane is to avoid me and never have a conversation. I have people who will post on my facebook etc but will never talk to me in person. I'm not intimidating at all ... well that's the general consensus of everyone I've vented to.

So yeah ... I totally feel ya pinkrasputin! :dry:
 

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Now I wish the ENFP I know was still in-state. I have an urge to test this but I only know one ENFP offline. :sad:
 

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Hah, Nice taxi driver...

If I have a captive audience like that, the more closed off the person appears the more motivation I have to attempt to crack them. SUPER Intraverts beware, I'll crack your code!
 

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MOTM Nov 2010
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Discussion Starter · #6 ·
Hah, Nice taxi driver...

If I have a captive audience like that, the more closed off the person appears the more motivation I have to attempt to crack them. SUPER Intraverts beware, I'll crack your code!
Exactly! I push and tried even harder. I went a bit crazy doing so.

I am so glad I am not alone in this. Shallow convos suck!
 

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I find that when I meet someone, I really like to get inside of them and see what makes them tick. I think of it as "cracking people open". I really like to do this and it is not hard for me usually.

I really only have one experience when someone wouldn't let me do this. It was my taxi cab driver. He did not let me get to his core. He was listening to a football game in his earpiece or something when he was driving and he just wouldn't budge. I was dumbfounded. Lol. It really frustrated me. My boyfriend at the time was in the cab with me and laughing at me. This man would not indulge in conversation. Time was working against me as we were only traveling a couple of miles. Our destination was quickly approaching. Yet, I was taking this man's indifference like a slap in the face. I remember saying things like "But you don't seem to understand. Everyone talks to me. Everyone likes talking to me." Hahaha. This is like the only time I can think of where I hit a wall. So I had to use ridiculous behavior and say ridiculous things in return.

But usually it is really easy for me to crack people open. I don't have to tap too hard and everything usually just spills out from them. Many times I don't even need to tap. They just freely spill.

I love figuring out people so I can tell what they may need to hear in order to make their lives more balanced. It's not a good day when people like Mr. Taxi don't open up. Haha. :crazy: I mean, how am I going to leave them with specially tailored words of inspiration if they won't open? People like closed-core-taxi-cab-drivers frustrate my mission on this planet. :frustrating:

Do any of you feel like you need to get to the center of people? Do you need to get to their cores?
What do you see at my core?
 

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Subterranean Homesick Alien
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Do you think that might have to do with your Fi? Or do you think it might be Ne>Fi coming into play?
 

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MOTM Nov 2010
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Discussion Starter · #11 ·
What do you see at my core?
Well see, I don't feel like we've ever had a deep one on one conversation with each other. Just superficial contact here on the forum. But I'm sure within about 3 minutes of real convo we'd probably have both of each other figured out.

All I can say is that you're deep. Haha. No really. Okay, I'll try and make a "surfacy" stab at it anyways:

I know you can read people's motivations and it's clear you have a sense of internal values. You can make really slam shut decisions about another person's behaviors because of these values. You're not afraid to express them either. It's nice to see. You can do this before your Ne has a chance to catch up. I really admire that. You have a very deep, deep sense of right or wrong. You don't like bullshit and you are constantly questioning authenticity in both yourself and in others. As a matter of fact, in many ways, I think you are easier on others than yourself.

You analyze a lot and a lot of your mind space is spent reviewing everyone around you and their behaviors. Your constant need for input doesn't stem from being insecure, it stems from a commitment to being honest with yourself and "real". You like to self reflect, but you want to make sure you are objective. You know how you judge people, so you want to make sure you walk a path according to your own value judgements. This is one of your main reasons for running thing by others.

Your self reflecting can really make you sort of "emo" at times.lol. It can be painful to be so honest with yourself. I think you have a tendency to get stuck there too. This also makes it harder for you to trust the positive things you hear about you or automatically feel about yourself. So it's harder for others to really help dig you out of your pit. You stay too long in your negative pit because you want to make sure it is absolutely "right" and "correct" that you see yourself a certain way. So you weigh your original thoughts. I think that must be where Fi is dominant and you feel a certain way, but then you also send it through the Ne filtering process after.

I think you must often think "Am I judging myself by the same standard that I'm judging another person?" I would be careful not to use other people's negative actions to support or disapprove of a positive trait you already feel about yourself. How other people act around you, may have nothing to do with you what so ever. Believe it now that not everyone has a pure core like you. Once again, I know that reality sucks. But don't get all emo on me now, okay?

When you trust someone's input, that is really saying a lot. You have an amazing decoder of your own so you must trust very few. I bet you often wait for the world to catch up in your findings. That really sucks. Really, really sucks. When you can relate to someone on your higher evolved level, work hard at really keeping these people around. They will definitely help you feel less lonely and crazy in the world.

You should relax a bit more and trust the positive input around you. I know your values will not let it go to your head. It's okay to feel good about a compliment. I bet finding an outlet to help others, will do wonders in balancing your positive intake. In other words, helping others will allow you to receive positive input more gracefully. You can come to the understanding that it's necessary to know your gifts and strengths so that you can be more effective for others. It's okay to be confident about who are and your positive qualities. Those qualities attract people towards you, it may be for shallow reasons. That is okay, because you know that you are not a shallow person and that what you have to give is not shallow. You can have a very big impact on a person. Again I say that people will approach you for all different reasons; including shallow ones. But some of those same people may be also be able to read your inner complex self.

I've noticed your dedication to understand other people. This might also be a commitment to purging your soul of malice. The more you understand a person, the more tolerant you are able to be. The more tolerant you are of others can justify being tolerant with yourself and loved ones. How beautiful is that, Higher? Rarely is someone so beautiful inside and out. (Btw, tell Murderegina to relax. Lol. She's my cyber daughter okay? And I don't hit on my daugter's guy. :laughing:) Anyway, I'm just being honest.

My main concern about you is what you do while you're busy thinking so much. Be careful to constantly remind yourself to relax your forehead. You can develop two permanent wrinkles right between the eyebrows. I see you being a candidate for those wrinkles early in life if you are not more aware. Go do some yoga today and focus on the deep breath. Hahaha, I'm started to sound like Depak! Oh well...

Woops. That was long ^^^^ I'm sorry. If we ever had a real one on one, I'm sure I could get to your core and really tell you what I think.


I think Fi is the motivation and Ne is actual tool used.
Yes, and I'm so grateful that Ne is so speedy at picking up the patterns. Fi and Ne are a great tool for figuring out others. But maybe sometimes Ne can also be the motivating factor? It's like Ne needs to play. It needs input. It wants to receive info! Then Fi gets all excited because it knows that figuring out others will either validate me or help me to figure out myself.
 

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Yes, getting to the core/essence of a person is something I do even on an unconscious level, I imagine that the dive into someone can have it's benefits in different aspects opening up someone as a male or a female, pending the person being cracked opens comfortability and beliefs. I believe that in life I am in search of and see the big picture and gather pieces along the way from individuals true selves and am pushed away by what is put on for show and I can differentiate talking from the heart vs talking from the ego. Even when my ex would scream and yell in what looked like anger and felt at first like disrespect I could see the pain beneath at her core and hug her instead of biting back. I can only imagine the Taxi driver was really into the game....or was burnt out on conversations with passengers...or saw no reason in communicating with a woman who already had a boyfriend present ... Had a bad day ... ect lol I love convo's with taxi drivers especially on vacations... And we arrive at the core quick... talking of wife's, girlfriends..problems ...religion..politics..Kids..problems.. I thrive on giving words of advice to give them a positive outlook on their situations! :proud:
 

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Well see, I don't feel like we've ever had a deep one on one conversation with each other. Just superficial contact here on the forum. But I'm sure within about 3 minutes of real convo we'd probably have both of each other figured out.

All I can say is that you're deep. Haha. No really. Okay, I'll try and make a "surfacy" stab at it anyways:

I know you can read people's motivations and it's clear you have a sense of internal values. You can make really slam shut decisions about another person's behaviors because of these values. You're not afraid to express them either. It's nice to see. You can do this before your Ne has a chance to catch up. I really admire that. You have a very deep, deep sense of right or wrong. You don't like bullshit and you are constantly questioning authenticity in both yourself and in others. As a matter of fact, in many ways, I think you are easier on others than yourself.

You analyze a lot and a lot of your mind space is spent reviewing everyone around you and their behaviors. Your constant need for input doesn't stem from being insecure, it stems from a commitment to being honest with yourself and "real". You like to self reflect, but you want to make sure you are objective. You know how you judge people, so you want to make sure you walk a path according to your own value judgements. This is one of your main reasons for running thing by others.

Your self reflecting can really make you sort of "emo" at times.lol. It can be painful to be so honest with yourself. I think you have a tendency to get stuck there too. This also makes it harder for you to trust the positive things you hear about you or automatically feel about yourself. So it's harder for others to really help dig you out of your pit. You stay too long in your negative pit because you want to make sure it is absolutely "right" and "correct" that you see yourself a certain way. So you weigh your original thoughts. I think that must be where Fi is dominant and you feel a certain way, but then you also send it through the Ne filtering process after.

I think you must often think "Am I judging myself by the same standard that I'm judging another person?" I would be careful not to use other people's negative actions to support or disapprove of a positive trait you already feel about yourself. How other people act around you, may have nothing to do with you what so ever. Believe it now that not everyone has a pure core like you. Once again, I know that reality sucks. But don't get all emo on me now, okay?

When you trust someone's input, that is really saying a lot. You have an amazing decoder of your own so you must trust very few. I bet you often wait for the world to catch up in your findings. That really sucks. Really, really sucks. When you can relate to someone on your higher evolved level, work hard at really keeping these people around. They will definitely help you feel less lonely and crazy in the world.

You should relax a bit more and trust the positive input around you. I know your values will not let it go to your head. It's okay to feel good about a compliment. I bet finding an outlet to help others, will do wonders in balancing your positive intake. In other words, helping others will allow you to receive positive input more gracefully. You can come to the understanding that it's necessary to know your gifts and strengths so that you can be more effective for others. It's okay to be confident about who are and your positive qualities. Those qualities attract people towards you, it may be for shallow reasons. That is okay, because you know that you are not a shallow person and that what you have to give is not shallow. You can have a very big impact on a person. Again I say that people will approach you for all different reasons; including shallow ones. But some of those same people may be also be able to read your inner complex self.

I've noticed your dedication to understand other people. This might also be a commitment to purging your soul of malice. The more you understand a person, the more tolerant you are able to be. The more tolerant you are of others can justify being tolerant with yourself and loved ones. How beautiful is that, Higher? Rarely is someone so beautiful inside and out. (Btw, tell Murderegina to relax. Lol. She's my cyber daughter okay? And I don't hit on my daugter's guy. :laughing:) Anyway, I'm just being honest.

My main concern about you is what you do while you're busy thinking so much. Be careful to constantly remind yourself to relax your forehead. You can develop two permanent wrinkles right between the eyebrows. I see you being a candidate for those wrinkles early in life if you are not more aware. Go do some yoga today and focus on the deep breath. Hahaha, I'm started to sound like Depak! Oh well...

Woops. That was long ^^^^ I'm sorry. If we ever had a real one on one, I'm sure I could get to your core and really tell you what I think.


Yes, and I'm so grateful that Ne is so speedy at picking up the patterns. Fi and Ne are a great tool for figuring out others. But maybe sometimes Ne can also be the motivating factor? It's like Ne needs to play. It needs input. It wants to receive info! Then Fi gets all excited because it knows that figuring out others will either validate me or help me to figure out myself.
Pretty damn good for talking maybe 4 times ..... goodness. That was really good. I'm impressed. Thanks for that. (i have lots of thoughts but my feelings are just so like.... "ahhhh crazy" that it's hard to say them)
 
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I get what you are saying pink.


As much as I fear emotional intimacy, I really, really crave it. I wish we could all walk around with our defenses and masks down and be just how we are. I wish we all could say exactly how we feel when we feel it. I wish people weren't afraid to be themselves because they fear how others will react.

Sometimes I get offended when people will not open up to me because I feel they are saying "I know you will judge me like everyone else will" and I don't like to think that people think of me that way.
 

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Pretty damn good for talking maybe 4 times ..... goodness. That was really good. I'm impressed. Thanks for that. (i have lots of thoughts but my feelings are just so like.... "ahhhh crazy" that it's hard to say them)
Yeah but I could have told you all that too if you had only told me if you liked puppies or not... :p
 

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Hah, Nice taxi driver...

If I have a captive audience like that, the more closed off the person appears the more motivation I have to attempt to crack them. SUPER Intraverts beware, I'll crack your code!
I'd be more than willing to be "cracked" by an ENFP if I knew more of them. Although, just to be difficult, I'd probably end up holding more back if I noticed that's what they were doing. :tongue:
 
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I'd be more than willing to be "cracked" by an ENFP if I knew more of them. Although, just to be difficult, I'd probably end up holding more back if I noticed that's what they were doing.
When done right, you'll be wanting to spill. It's not forced at all.
 

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When done right, you'll be wanting to spill. It's not forced at all.
As long as my brain isn't fried, I excel at keeping my thoughts to myself. In fact, I intend to get even better at it to prevent the kinds of misunderstandings that have been happening recently. So if you, or better yet an interesting female ENFP, were to meet me in person, I'd dare them to try! :tongue:
 
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