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INFJ 4w3 sp/sx
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NFs, how do you feel when people around you start talking about mundane, uninteresting stuff?

"The clothes don't fit", "my car", "my dog", "taking the kids to school" and all these things I find mind-numbingly banal.

I mean, I try to be polite and I won't be a jerk with someone because they started one of these conversations, but at times I just wish I could disappear from certain social situations.
 

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I don’t mind it so much - I tend to ask questions that would steer the conversation towards topics that I would be interested in talking about . I figured they’re trying to start a conversation with me so I’ll find a way to reciprocate .


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As long as it doesn't go on and on about one thing, it is not a bother for me. I can engage in mundane or practical matters for some time with interest, and if not I can also treat it as clues, that the clothes don't fit - what does that say about them and their choices? are they reluctant to buy new as it is a waste of resources, or do they save up money for travel? or tend to buy a little too small or big in hopes of ushering themselves into their ideal bodyshape? or is it more about the clothes industry and not them as individuals, that sizes don't cater to all body types, and it might be to big in some places and small in some? what does that say about how we structure society and how could things be different? ought we start to make more tailor made clothes instead? have fewer choices in style, more kinds of sizes. What kind of psychological effects would it have on us as a group if more people felt comfortable in their clothes and thus more confident? ..................... and so on.

All the little details that are not so interesting each and one on their own, become so in combination too, so I often collect them, start puzzling later, guessing away.
 

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Depends on if I'm on the sidelines or am targeted as the direct sounding board. For the former, I walk away with an amicable excuse if questioned. For the latter, it's harder. I half zone out and just "hm", "uh-huh", "yeah", "ok", "oh no" at random intervals. I feel guilty when I do this at first, but if the conversation is purely one-sided then I come to feel almost no guilt at all. I let the person talk my ear off until a proper interruption grants me an opportunity to politely discontinue the conversation and initiate an escape plan. Also depends on the topic and what I can contribute.
 

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I mean, I try to be polite and I won't be a jerk with someone because they started one of these conversations, but at times I just wish I could disappear from certain social situations.
Yeah, same for me - trying to be polite if someone starts those topics but I can't participate such conversations for a long time - boring, dull and uninteresting :) And smalltalk definitely isn't my cup of tea. I've even walked away from the social gatherings if I'm unable to eventually turn the topics into something else / nobody is interested in more abstract/philosophical discussions. Fortunately I've mostly surrounded myself with like-minded people so this situation is rare enough :)
 

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Mundane and uninteresting is subjective..

Who says deep and philosophical conversations are necessarily interesting? After a certain point they bore me to death as well.
 

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I’m learning to talk SI with my ESFJ son. He gets bored with my concepts, but it is really hard for me to not frame everything with general concepts. Yesterday since he really opened up about his day I sat with a huge smile on my face as he said “Then we went here. Then we bought X..” He really doesn’t open up much to me so his excitement to tell me all the sensory details was so endearing. He is so good at them too! Parts for computers that he knows the exact right thing for. Showing me on a map where they were immediately when I asked. Names of places and things and tools he remembers that I would be shocked if I remembered or could even describe. This because he is my darling son, I am so happy to try to open up for.

Usually it would feel a bit awkward if I can’t move people into talking about things I’m interested in. Sometimes I can’t. Usually I can. Two to tango.
 

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I don't really mind, I like to know some of the basics about people I know. If it's random strangers, then no thanks. I can get bored when someone just goes on and on about unimportant details sometimes.
 

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Beer Guardian
ENTP 5w6 So/Sx 584 ILE Honorary INTJ
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NFs, how do you feel when people around you start talking about mundane, uninteresting stuff?

"The clothes don't fit", "my car", "my dog", "taking the kids to school" and all these things I find mind-numbingly banal.

I mean, I try to be polite and I won't be a jerk with someone because they started one of these conversations, but at times I just wish I could disappear from certain social situations.
Even mundane things can give you clues about the perspectives of others. What's important to them is important to me. What they say is just as important as what they don't say.
 

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NFs, how do you feel when people around you start talking about mundane, uninteresting stuff?

"The clothes don't fit", "my car", "my dog", "taking the kids to school" and all these things I find mind-numbingly banal.

I mean, I try to be polite and I won't be a jerk with someone because they started one of these conversations, but at times I just wish I could disappear from certain social situations.
One person's boring is another person's interest. I'm with you on all the ones listed, except the dog. I'm a dog lover. Next to my wife, man's best friend.

But yeah, the worst is when people talk about shopping for everyday things, color of sofas, etc. If you are gonna tell me about your daily routine, something very interesting or very funny better have happened during. Otherwise I kind of daze out into my own little world, and fortunately if somebody asks me a question I have like this background rewind I can do while I clear my throat and look off like I'm thinking about the question, figure out what the conversation was and be like, "No, I wouldn't buy a purple couch." Then I'm off to my own little world again.

But, I know not everyone shares my favorite subjects either, so trying to get others to join in with my speculations as to what Stonehenge was originally built for may draw blank stares.
 

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--Edit--
wait what? I already posted just a line up there a while ago, I don't remember that.... I thought I had begun and then just closed the window because I was distracted and thought I"ll come back later... weird. Did my daughter accidentally post that while leaning on my computer? who knows. I could just have bad memory.
-----

I'm fine with 'mundane' conversations with people if they are someone I actually care about. I mean... it would be weird to know someone's philosophical ideas but not any of the basics like how many siblings they have or what kind of sandwiches they like or what they did this weekend or whatever. I do like to hear about the boring stuff people are up to in their daily lives - when they are a person that matters to me. I want to ALSO have the deep conversations and can feel frustrated when someone never seems to be interested in talking about ideas or feelings.

I can get a little frustrated when I feel like someone is spending a lot of time on details that don't seem to be relevant to the point of what they are saying, although I don't generally mind sidetracks.
 
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