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MOTM Dec 2011
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Discussion Starter #1
There are many threads where people list the MBTI types they feel would be an ideal match for them....however, in this thread, let's do the opposite.

Describe your ideal romantic match, and then let others determine what type(s) such a person sounds like (both MBTI & enneagram).

And no doubt our ideals may not turn out so ideal in reality, or an unexpected type may fit them, but this is just a game, ooookay? :kitteh:

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I'll start....type this guy!

- Intelligence is very important (but he doesn't have to be "book smart" like me). Ability to grasp things somewhat quickly & easily & to communicate well. Good vocabulary & grammar is also nice. I usually prefer someone more "cerebral" than physical.

- Has creativity/talent/expertise/special interests. I like a guy with a sense of who he is & who can express it in an interesting way, someone I can admire. I need someone who can appreciate & admire my talents/intelligence/strengths also.

- Compatible interests to mine. Cultured: loves music, appreciates art, eats different foods, likes intellectual things, wants to travel, etc.

- Compatible Humor; a combo of witty, playful, silly.

- Kind, compassionate, thoughtful, considerate, encouraging, supportive. Able to see other perspectives, can give the benefit of the doubt, can take constructive criticism.

- Can lead and initiate/plan. More organized and structured than me, but not anal retentive. Responsible when it counts, but not rigid/uptight.

- Spontaneous and adventurous and likes new things/ideas/places, etc. A sense of Romanticism.

- Spiritual, shared beliefs. High moral standards and integrity.

- Has deep feelings and is loyal, but not overly dependent or emotionally weak/clingy. I prefer someone who is warm and can express their feeling, but I don't mind someone more reserved either.

Of course there's also physical attraction & "chemistry", but that's not something to be typed.
 

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When I honestly had many of these traits I was not successful dating. When I became the reverse outwardly - I was no longer dateless. When I was the bad guy on the outside long enough, ......
At least I'm no longer dateless.
 

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MOTM Dec 2011
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Discussion Starter #3
When I honestly had many of these traits I was not successful dating. When I became the reverse outwardly - I was no longer dateless. When I was the bad guy on the outside long enough, ......
At least I'm no longer dateless.
So are you typing that as INFJ then?
 

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There are many threads where people list the MBTI types they feel would be an ideal match for them....however, in this thread, let's do the opposite.

Describe your ideal romantic match, and then let others determine what type(s) such a person sounds like (both MBTI & enneagram).

And no doubt our ideals may not turn out so ideal in reality, or an unexpected type may fit them, but this is just a game, ooookay? :kitteh:

-----

I'll start....type this guy!

- Intelligence is very important (but he doesn't have to be "book smart" like me). Ability to grasp things somewhat quickly & easily & to communicate well. Good vocabulary & grammar is also nice. I usually prefer someone more "cerebral" than physical.

- Has creativity/talent/expertise/special interests. I like a guy with a sense of who he is & who can express it in an interesting way, someone I can admire. I need someone who can appreciate & admire my talents/intelligence/strengths also.

- Compatible interests to mine. Cultured: loves music, appreciates art, eats different foods, likes intellectual things, wants to travel, etc.

- Compatible Humor; a combo of witty, playful, silly.

- Kind, compassionate, thoughtful, considerate, encouraging, supportive. Able to see other perspectives, can give the benefit of the doubt, can take constructive criticism.

- Can lead and initiate/plan. More organized and structured than me, but not anal retentive. Responsible when it counts, but not rigid/uptight.

- Spontaneous and adventurous and likes new things/ideas/places, etc. A sense of Romanticism.

- Spiritual, shared beliefs. High moral standards and integrity.

- Has deep feelings and is loyal, but not overly dependent or emotionally weak/clingy. I prefer someone who is warm and can express their feeling, but I don't mind someone more reserved either.

Of course there's also physical attraction & "chemistry", but that's not something to be typed.
Maybe ENFJ?

The J part would make them good at leadership and organisation.

The NF part would make them have high ideals.

The E would make them expressive.

Then the intelligent and cultured aspect would be luck of the draw I guess :D
 

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MOTM Dec 2011
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Discussion Starter #5
^ Yeah, I always think it sounds like an ENFJ also....maybe e3w4.

The thing is, I just got out of a relationship with an INFJ e3w4; but he was lacking some of those key qualities (like being a responsible adult who works & doesn't mooch of his parents like a bum :dry:).

Okay, list yours :wink:
 

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Well your ideal guy sounds overall impressive. A good mix of being liberal minded but also organised and efficient.

Some of the traits I like:

Someone socially aware. No prejudices.

Left wing political values. I don't mind if they are extreme left ;)

Eccentric would be a plus. Someone who doesn't mind living a non-conventional life.

Intellectual

Non judgmental. Especially when it comes to me. At the moment I can't live up to normal social expectations so I need someone who will be patient with me while I work hard to reach my goals.

I would like if she could introduce me to new things, particularly cultural things.

Someone who will allow me to have space and independence, but is also affectionate.
 

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Someone honest, easy-going, can keep up with me physically, at least a little above-average, doesn't care much about what I say, doesn't mind my friends, realizes I go through mood swings, doesn't mind my addiction, is open-minded, a little cynical, has some problems, is hard to get a definite read on, respects me. About it.
 

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MOTM Dec 2011
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Discussion Starter #9
@Luke
I'd think any of the following:
enneagram: 4w5, 4w3, 5w4, 7w6, 9w8
exFP 4w3, 7w6
IxFP 4w5, 4w3, 5w4, 9w8
IxTP 5w4, 9w8

Could be a J who is more easy-going, patient, and okay with less structure in life. I get a P vibe from this though.


@MisterLiver
I'm leaning towards almost any introvert or some exxPs, but could be many types.
enneagram: 4, 6, 7, 9
 

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Fu Dominant
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I've been trying to come up with an ideal woman for me, but when it comes down to it, this is what I look for most in a SO:

-Accepts me for me, flaws and all, and loves me regardless.
-Genuine, honest, compassionate, and kind.

Really, that's all I'm looking for that really matters. I can work with the rest, but these qualities are pretty much either in someone, or they're not. And since I'm an INFJ, well... good luck on me finding anyone who'll take the time to get to know me, in order to be accepting of me. :eek:P I can usually tell fairly quickly after meeting someone if they're genuine and kind or not, but it takes some effort on their part to know me to know if they'll be accepting or not.

And man, oh man, does it ever suck when they don't accept me, especially after spending all the time with them. :eek:(

Edit/Addition: I don't know what type would fit, or what type would be best for me. An NT would be good for bring the rationale into the relationship, but an NF would provide and understand more of the affection I want to both receive and give. The only thing I can really say for certain is that I'd benefit more from an E than an I. I'm way too introverted on my own as it is. The only way another introvert would probably work well is if she was just barely introvert (and possibly very extroverted in her T or F).
 

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There are many threads where people list the MBTI types they feel would be an ideal match for them....however, in this thread, let's do the opposite.

Describe your ideal romantic match, and then let others determine what type(s) such a person sounds like (both MBTI & enneagram).

And no doubt our ideals may not turn out so ideal in reality, or an unexpected type may fit them, but this is just a game, ooookay? :kitteh:

-----

I'll start....type this guy!

- Intelligence is very important (but he doesn't have to be "book smart" like me). Ability to grasp things somewhat quickly & easily & to communicate well. Good vocabulary & grammar is also nice. I usually prefer someone more "cerebral" than physical.

- Has creativity/talent/expertise/special interests. I like a guy with a sense of who he is & who can express it in an interesting way, someone I can admire. I need someone who can appreciate & admire my talents/intelligence/strengths also.

- Compatible interests to mine. Cultured: loves music, appreciates art, eats different foods, likes intellectual things, wants to travel, etc.

- Compatible Humor; a combo of witty, playful, silly.

- Kind, compassionate, thoughtful, considerate, encouraging, supportive. Able to see other perspectives, can give the benefit of the doubt, can take constructive criticism.

- Can lead and initiate/plan. More organized and structured than me, but not anal retentive. Responsible when it counts, but not rigid/uptight.

- Spontaneous and adventurous and likes new things/ideas/places, etc. A sense of Romanticism.

- Spiritual, shared beliefs. High moral standards and integrity.

- Has deep feelings and is loyal, but not overly dependent or emotionally weak/clingy. I prefer someone who is warm and can express their feeling, but I don't mind someone more reserved either.

Of course there's also physical attraction & "chemistry", but that's not something to be typed.
A mature and healthy INFJ comes closest to this on first read through.
 

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- someone I can bring camping (no running water, no electricity, more than an hour from the nearest store) and to anime conventions
- honest, loyal, caring, communicative
- medium curves in all the right places, raven black hair, green eyes, facial features right between angled and rounded
- can walk a mile in the right shoes without complaining
- knows what the right shoes are and will wear them
- understands the concept of dressing for the weather and actually does it - without drama
- will not bash my interest in science or spirituality; not looking to convert me
- capable and willing to have a minimum 5000 word English vocabulary (if we're using English as our common language), if only to be able to understand what I say and not be intimidated by it.
- desiring of sex three times per week, minimum 24 hours of time together over a two week period*, a cuddle fiend
- willing to allow me minimum 24 hours per two week period for "quiet time"*, 24 hours per two week period for my friends or hobbies*
- willing to have kids, whether birthing them or adopting them (1-2 optimum, I'd like to avoid the Brady Bunch)
- can game with me (video games, table top, board games)
- has a modicum of control over her spending habits to at least get the needed things paid for first, before the wants or the fun things
- can handle some scheduling, but not hobbled without it
- prefers education over restriction

* all three with asterisk have the potential to be done together, contributing to all three needs at the same time or a mix of two, depending on the situation. Adjustments for kids will be needed and can be done based on their needs.

I hope it goes without saying that this is the ideal I have come up with and not the minimum requirements for someone I'd still consider "amazing".

Good luck...

Edit: the asterisk stuff also is not including time spent working or sleeping.
I also missed a few:
- knows or is willing to learn basic firearm handling: use of the safety, proper carrying, loading, unloading, trigger discipline.
- basic chemical safety knowledge
- half decent ability with a weapon and able to improvise
 

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MOTM Dec 2011
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Discussion Starter #13
@Runvardh
I'm going to say a xxTP

enneagram - 5, 6, 7, 9

Sounds like an ENTP 7w6 I know.
 

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@Runvardh
I'm going to say a xxTP

enneagram - 5, 6, 7, 9

Sounds like an ENTP 7w6 I know.
I was wondering about the TP after I wrote it; I suck at judging Enneagram, though.

I'm just pessimistic enough, though, that if a girl like that existed close enough to me, and actually wanted me, I'd get run over by a bus soon after meeting her.
 

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Loon Princess
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I like a girl who's:

  • Affectionate, caring
  • Spontaneous and charming
  • Willing to explore opportunity
  • Vocal so I have the chance to be
  • Humanly flawed, so I can help her
  • Embarrasses me with at least occasional public displays of affection
  • Someone with a high level of identity
  • Open-ended
  • Soulful and intense in terms of emotions, just like I am
  • Persistent with getting to know me, it can be hard sometimes, but I will love you forever if you do that.
  • Someone with her own faults, not perfect, but a mentally healthy person all around
  • Must love hugs
  • Intelligent, but not belligerent
Everyone knows what MBTI type I'm talking about... :wink:
 

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MOTM Dec 2011
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Discussion Starter #16
@Torai

ENFP or ESFP, maybe some ExFJs who are less structured
enneagram: 2w3, 3w2, 4w3, 7w6
 

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I was wondering about the TP after I wrote it; I suck at judging Enneagram, though.

I'm just pessimistic enough, though, that if a girl like that existed close enough to me, and actually wanted me, I'd get run over by a bus soon after meeting her.
If you exist, then your match exists too. You deserve it. Keep the faith. :)
 

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@Torai

ENFP or ESFP, maybe some ExFJs who are less structured
enneagram: 2w3, 3w2, 4w3, 7w6
Yeah, I'd agree there. ExFP with some structure, or a 'softer' ExFJ. I'd say a certain amount of maturity and self-confidence in all four cases would produce this.


If you exist, then your match exists too. You deserve it. Keep the faith. :)
I guess it's less about the existence, or being deserving and more looking at the way my luck as been all my life. If I were truly superstitious, just thinking of these traits together would now require me to accumulate a serious amount of good karma just to ensure I don't lose my job or something. LOL
 

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Well your ideal guy sounds overall impressive. A good mix of being liberal minded but also organised and efficient.

Some of the traits I like:

Someone socially aware. No prejudices.

Left wing political values. I don't mind if they are extreme left ;)

Eccentric would be a plus. Someone who doesn't mind living a non-conventional life.

Intellectual

Non judgmental. Especially when it comes to me. At the moment I can't live up to normal social expectations so I need someone who will be patient with me while I work hard to reach my goals.

I would like if she could introduce me to new things, particularly cultural things.

Someone who will allow me to have space and independence, but is also affectionate.
A more mature and non-religious sort of FP, I'd say.



Someone honest, easy-going, can keep up with me physically, at least a little above-average, doesn't care much about what I say, doesn't mind my friends, realizes I go through mood swings, doesn't mind my addiction, is open-minded, a little cynical, has some problems, is hard to get a definite read on, respects me. About it.
SP comes to mind first, but NPs also can get this way. More T than F, but not to an extreme. If N, then they'd more likely need to be an E, where as S could be either I or E.



I've been trying to come up with an ideal woman for me, but when it comes down to it, this is what I look for most in a SO:

-Accepts me for me, flaws and all, and loves me regardless.
-Genuine, honest, compassionate, and kind.

Really, that's all I'm looking for that really matters. I can work with the rest, but these qualities are pretty much either in someone, or they're not. And since I'm an INFJ, well... good luck on me finding anyone who'll take the time to get to know me, in order to be accepting of me. :eek:P I can usually tell fairly quickly after meeting someone if they're genuine and kind or not, but it takes some effort on their part to know me to know if they'll be accepting or not.

And man, oh man, does it ever suck when they don't accept me, especially after spending all the time with them. :eek:(

Edit/Addition: I don't know what type would fit, or what type would be best for me. An NT would be good for bring the rationale into the relationship, but an NF would provide and understand more of the affection I want to both receive and give. The only thing I can really say for certain is that I'd benefit more from an E than an I. I'm way too introverted on my own as it is. The only way another introvert would probably work well is if she was just barely introvert (and possibly very extroverted in her T or F).
An NFP who has their shit together or an NFJ who has relaxed a little. Most mature NTs and SFs should be able to do this - honestly past a certain age there's not enough info to type from.
 

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Loon Princess
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ENFP or ESFP, maybe some ExFJs who are less structured
enneagram: 2w3, 3w2, 4w3, 7w6
Yeah, I'd agree there. ExFP with some structure, or a 'softer' ExFJ. I'd say a certain amount of maturity and self-confidence in all four cases would produce this.
I think I was going for ENFP 4w3. Maybe I should make the N more obvious... ESFP women might not be a bad idea, but they might be a little too realistic for my taste. I want an ENFP who's structured enough to not be commitment-phobic. I've heard EP's are like that, but I honestly can't be sure. Never analyzed an EP's relationship habits.

I could totally handle an ENFJ, even if they're not soft. I just don't want someone who's got the same cognitive functions as I do. Sounds boring. ESFJ seems too much in terms of structure... I don't want to be treated like the helpless infant in the relationship just because I'm not organized in the way they are.
 
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