I find it hard to be myself around people even friends.
Am I the only one?
Am I the only one?
Sometimes the right thing can be the wrong thing.I agree it does take very special person to for me to be myself around, but I haven't met a single person yet I can do that with.
I try to do this with people I am in relationship with, but usually doesn't work and when I do open up or try to be myself it usually blows up in my face. In a relationship I find that I am usually really insecure and need security constantly thinking about how I should act. As a man and as the person boyfriend. So I am constantly worrying not exposing my true feeling for them and acting like I am colder than I am. Just not be hurt in the long run. So so much for being myself with them.
I think I act like myself to a certain point around close friendships and close relationships but I never really open up and I find I cannot be the way I am with myself around anyone, not even close. I feel more like I am building so many walls that I feel like I can't never let them down. I cannot seem to get over this.
Sometimes the right thing can be the wrong thing.
and teh wrong thing is the right thing.
other times we are all correct and all perfect.
I find the second mindset is harder to show or be as people are searching for it rather than knowing it.
I am not sure if this is going to help you or not but my heart goes out to you. it really does.
i almost want to cry right now. I hope you feel better soon. just feeling better takes away so much of the pain, finding love does as well. creating your own world or living in a world that is familiar also helps.
it's better to be yourself and find the people who will love that you.Yes, I am even more aware of this lately, and there are times when I get a really SICK feeling in my stomach when i feel like i spend a lot of time with one of my masks on and a persona people expect of me.
it's better to be yourself and find the people who will love that you.I can only try to be more open but that is definitely harder then sounds. Because I don't feel like I can trust anyone I know with any information. Although they tell me a lot about themselves Its just that I know how are they are with other people and I refuse to be victim of there gossiping and it getting around even slightly.
I just do not feel right about it.
It is their business if they talk a lot about themselves to you. It was their choice. Do not feel indebted to reciprocate. Separate information you can share with others without any danger. There is usually some kind of reasonable information you can disclose about yourself. May be it is something meaningless, like telling others that you have an allergy to mangos, but it is still a bit of self-disclosure. When people meet they talk about weather for a reason. Nobody wants to disclose and then have that information be used against them. So keep it on surface-to-medium depth level. There are very few people out there who will understand you and who can be fully trusted. This is just a fact of life, not just for INFJs but for everybody.I can only try to be more open but that is definitely harder then sounds. Because I don't feel like I can trust anyone I know with any information. Although they tell me a lot about themselves Its just that I know how are they are with other people and I refuse to be victim of there gossiping and it getting around even slightly. I just do not feel right about it.
not only have I felt it but I have done it several times - I moved 4 times in the past seven years, for studies/work and also to live with my now ex-bf - every place I experienced a sort of relief of being able to start things anewI often feel like getting away starting fresh and letting my real self come out.
Do you guys feel that way?
Very well said, Ive moved well over a dozen times, and while I like the relief, it get's lonely. I now have almost no material and emotional attachments. If I choose to, and I probably will, I will be able to move around with relative ease-then I can.......I don't know....does anyone have an idea what I should do? Maybe I should start a thread?not only have I felt it but I have done it several times - I moved 4 times in the past seven years, for studies/work and also to live with my now ex-bf - every place I experienced a sort of relief of being able to start things anew
but nowhere can you really show your real self - only relief comes if you figure out what you like and dislike and actually manipulate environment to fit your needs rather than keep running away from it, i.e. given the material learn to create own happiness - seems very difficult, but always running gets tiring and you can really only afford it at younger age when you have no kids or family