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In real life, what are some major observations youve noticed of people who have T and F preferences? What are some more obvious giveaways that show you someone may be one or the other?

these are some specific situations im interested in:
- how they sound in emails
- how they give you feedback on your ideas
- offering advice - when they see a problem or something imperfect, they offer their opinions or possible solutions whether or not they were asked? are T/F preferences more likely to do this?
- being minimalist or superfluous with words
- conversation styles - cutting someone off if that person is stepping their boundaries (time, space, content of discussion)

these are just observations im interested in based on what your experiences have been.. but if there are other specific situations you guys have, can you add them here? are there any kind of simple" tests" IRL or something I could do or say just to observe the reaction and figure out if someone is T or F? btw, i specifically ask about this cause in the past my ISTJ friends seem to always do or say something just to see someone's reaction or to figure them out :proud::proud::proud:
 

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In real life, what are some major observations youve noticed of people who have T and F preferences? What are some more obvious giveaways that show you someone may be one or the other?

these are some specific situations im interested in:
- how they sound in emails
- how they give you feedback on your ideas
- offering advice - when they see a problem or something imperfect, they offer their opinions or possible solutions whether or not they were asked? are T/F preferences more likely to do this?
- being minimalist or superfluous with words
- conversation styles - cutting someone off if that person is stepping their boundaries (time, space, content of discussion)

these are just observations im interested in based on what your experiences have been.. but if there are other specific situations you guys have, can you add them here? are there any kind of simple" tests" IRL or something I could do or say just to observe the reaction and figure out if someone is T or F? btw, i specifically ask about this cause in the past my ISTJ friends seem to always do or say something just to see someone's reaction or to figure them out :proud::proud::proud:
Perhaps feelers use emoticons/smileys more often in text-based communication? You probably can't rely on that by itself though as I use quite a lot of emoticons too.

Thinker is probably more minimalistic with words, more direct to the point while a Feeler may waffle more. As a thinker, I tend to be direct and to the point in emails instead of putting in unnecessary waffling. I never ask someone 'how are you' or 'how's your day been' unless I actually want to know. I don't recall ever asking someone 'how do you feel? / how are you feeling?' either.

I think both types would offer potential solutions though for Thinkers they would probably offer practical situations from their viewpoint while Feelers may instead first ask you about how YOU feel about the situation and use it to tailor their advice and perhaps be a bit more indirect in how they offer advice e.g. "Do you think perhaps you should do... etc" or "How do you feel about... etc" whereas a Thinker might go "I think the best thing to do would be to... etc". I hardly ever ask someone how they feel during advice-giving, I assume that what I think they are feeling (due to the facts of the situation) is right and don't bother asking them. My INFJ friend normally tells me how she feels about a particular situation/dilemma even if I don't ask anyway.

Conversation style factors that you described seem to be more dependent on Introverted and Extroverted tendencies. E.g. an introvert would feel uncomfortable cutting off someone. That being said I would say that I would feel more comfortable cutting someone off compared to my INFJ friend.

One definite and the most obvious indicator is that Feelers put a lot of emphasis in how they feel about a situation or person to make decisions while I tend to stick with logical facts and try to ignore my 'illogical' feelings.

I wouldn't say I purposely "do or say something just to see someone's reaction or to figure them out" but I am always cataloging away information when I'm interacting with someone and adding to my knowledge of them which is used to judge them.

Note: I'm basing this on my interactions with my INFJ friend so this may only loosely apply to feeler-thinker interaction

I also think that it's hard to generalise thinkers and feelers into two categories because how that attribute interacts with their other personality attributes e.g. judging, introvertness would also affect how they interact with other people. What I've listed above for thinkers probably differs compared to NT's (I don't really know how they think).

This may also help you in understanding the different factors making up the personality types (useful link given to me by Bottes):
http://personalitycafe.com/cognitiv...iled-descriptions-each-function-attitude.html
 

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Here's something I posted a while back:

As an ISTJ, you are a thinker as opposed to a feeler. Don't make the mistake of assuming that thinkers don't feel and that feelers don't think--nothing is further from the truth. The thinker makes decisions more objectively and without as much regard for the people impacted, while the feeler makes decisions more subjectively with an eye toward how their decisions will impact others. So thinkers tend to come across as impersonal, logical, seekers of justice and truth, with rules being followed regardless of consequences, while feelers come across as personal, tactful, seekers of justice tempered with mercy and harmony and with rules being impacted by extenuating circumstances.

As an ISTJ, be careful here as feelings can get hurt in the decision making process. This area can make you appear hard nosed and unrelenting. Try thinking of the people side of decisions before you come down too firmly in your stated position.
 

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Example:

Tonight I was talking to a coworker. She asked for advice regarding some books she bought via mail. Long story short, the company is pretty bogus. The material wasn't as advertised, so she took the books back to the post office and returned them. Now the company is claiming non-receipt of the items and has turned it over to a collection agency.

I told her that her first mistake was in that she didn't return the package via delivery confirmation and/or certified mail, and that in the future, she should always do that. Next, she needs to retain ALL receipts, dates/times of conversations (and with whom), etc. Then, she should Google the business, find the corporate address, and contact the company (delivery confirmation/certified again). Failing that, find the email addresses of TPTB and send an Executive Email Carpet Bomb (basically sending the same letter to any/all executives at the company). If THAT doesn't work, she could always post on the Consumerist, as well as social networking sites like Twitter, etc.

She took my advice quite well; she and I have developed a rapport over time (she's an INFJ). The only things that irritated ME about the whole thing are 1)she's a grown woman and should have taken these steps already, and 2)she kept saying how she wanted to kick herself over what happened. Seriously?! Don't waste time in self-defeating behavior; just take the steps and get it done and over with.

P.S. I also told her the EXACT verbiage to use in a letter in contacting the collection agency to dispute the debt, as specific language must be used in order to get them to cease collection activity while the matter is being investigated.
 

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^^Overall, I would think this shows more elements of judging vs. thinking or feeling. It shows a strong TJ minnd.

An excerpt from a website (a site that has been useful to me):


Thinking and Feeling


When Jung studied human behavior, he noticed that people have the capability to make decisions based on two very different sets of criteria: Thinking and Feeling. When someone makes a decision that is based on logic and reason, they are operating in Thinking mode. When someone makes a decision that is based on their value system, or what they believe to be right, they are operating in Feeling mode. We all use both modes for making decisions, but we put more trust into one mode or the other. A "Thinker" makes decisions in a rational, logical, impartial manner, based on what they believe to be fair and correct by pre-defined rules of behavior. A "Feeler" makes decisions on the individual case, in a subjective manner based on what they believe to be right within their own value systems.

We are making decisions in the Thinking mode when we:

*Research a product via consumer reports, and buy the best one to meet our needs
*Do "The Right Thing", whether or not we like it
*Choose not to buy a blue shirt which we like, because we have two blue shirts
*Establish guidelines to follow for performing tasks

We are making decisions in the Feeling mode when we:

*Decide to buy something because we like it
*Refrain from telling someone something which we feel may upset them
*Decide not to take a job because we don't like the work environment
*Decide to move somewhere to be close to someone we care about

Some decisions are made entirely by Thinking or Feelings processes. Most decisions involve some Thinking and some Feeling. Decisions that we find most difficult are those in which we have conflicts between our Thinking and Feeling sides. In these situations, our dominant preference will take over. Decisions which we find easy to make and feel good about are usually a result of being in sync with both our Feeling and Thinking sides.

Source
 

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- how they give you feedback on your ideas
My brother and I used to joke that we were going to give my mom business cards that read, "(Mom's Name), Dreamcrusher". Now we can see that she wasn't trying to be hurtful, just realistic about how to fix the problem/make the situation better.

- being minimalist or superfluous with words
I think this is probably more of a difference between E/I and possibly N/S

- conversation styles - cutting someone off if that person is stepping their boundaries (time, space, content of discussion)
Someone with introverted feeling as their dominant or auxiliary function would probably be the more vocal about their boundaries being overstepped in regards to "content of discussion".

We are making decisions in the Thinking mode when we:

*Research a product via consumer reports, and buy the best one to meet our needs
*Do "The Right Thing", whether or not we like it
*Choose not to buy a blue shirt which we like, because we have two blue shirts
*Establish guidelines to follow for performing tasks

We are making decisions in the Feeling mode when we:

*Decide to buy something because we like it
*Refrain from telling someone something which we feel may upset them
*Decide not to take a job because we don't like the work environment
*Decide to move somewhere to be close to someone we care about
I'm not picking on Niss here, and I realize this was the authors attempt at illustrating Thinking vs Feeling, but I disagree that these examples above are an accurate way to determine a thinking or feeling preference of another person.

Thinkers:
*Research a product via consumer reports, and buy the best one to meet our needs
Feelers:
*Decide to buy something because we like it
I disagree that these examples are a conclusive way of determining a feeling or thinking preference. I can't begin to tell you how many times I've read how Feelers do things without thinking things through (And these posts and articles were written by adults, not angsty teenagers.): "Oh my XXFX friend bought a specific car because it was cute", "Feelers would probably buy the adorable house that needs a lot of work instead of the structurally sound house that is outdated", "Feelers would more likely to marry an abusive spouse than a thinker would". Uh... what? It's as if Feelers don't have any common sense when they make decisions and are essentially slaves to their emotions. I freaking hate it.

Thinkers:
*Do "The Right Thing", whether or not we like it
Introverted feeling (dominant function for ISFP and INFP, auxiliary for ENFP and ESFP) drives an individual to "do the right thing" so, again, this is not an accurate way of determining one's preference.

Thinkers:
*Establish guidelines to follow for performing tasks
Feelers:
*Refrain from telling someone something which we feel may upset them
I think the two quotes above are probably the most correct examples of how Jung defined thinking (analytical, sequential) and feeling (empathy, harmony) functions.
 

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GASP! Tuttle has dared to disagree with niss!

*Leans back in chair, tents hands and sequentially taps fingertips together while considering Tuttle's fate*

Srsly--at work--be back later to deal with this little...insurrection, shall we say. :wink::tongue:
 

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GASP! Tuttle has dared to disagree with niss!

*Leans back in chair, tents hands and sequentially taps fingertips together while considering Tuttle's fate*

Srsly--at work--be back later to deal with this little...insurrection, shall we say. :wink::tongue:
Ha! I honestly was a bit concerned as to how my "insurrection" would be addressed. Funny you should mention that. :proud: I'll be back later too to see how this will turn out. (In between innings, of course.)
 

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Ha! I honestly was a bit concerned as to how my "insurrection" would be addressed. Funny you should mention that. :proud: I'll be back later too to see how this will turn out. (In between innings, of course.)
Ok, all seriousness aside, being concerned about my reaction is silly. I've posted a lot in this forum 'cuz I want to see other ISTJs feel comfortable posting their thoughts and coming to grips with who they are. If I'm a little vulnerable, no biggie. I ain't nuthin' special no how.

I also like to discuss ideas with people of opposing view points. I learn a lot more from people that challenge my thinking than I do from people that agree with me.

And I sure hope I'm not coming across as intimidating or as not being open to differing opinions.

One final point for clarity: I like you and Mr. Tuttle. I enjoyed going out with y'all the other night and intend to do so again. Maybe next time we can go bowling or play miniature golf so the kids can come too. 'Course, you may not want Mr. Tuttle hangin' around with the likes of me. I'll have him goin' to deer camp and talkin' smack about the women if ya ain't keerful. :laughing:

Curious0610 said:
- being minimalist or superfluous with words
I think this is probably more of a difference between E/I and possibly N/S
Umm...keying in on superfluous, I'd view this as more of a posturing attitude related to insecurity. Seeking approval of others for the lack of self approval. As for being laconic, I'd view that as more of an attitude of either not being interested in the topic or a lack of understanding of the topic--and this could be exacerbated by other factors such as being uneasy in the situation (such as an introvert in a crowd might be). Remember, the healthy introvert will talk at length about topics which they feel comfortable discussing in a setting where they are socially comfortable.

Curious0610 said:
- conversation styles - cutting someone off if that person is stepping their boundaries (time, space, content of discussion)
Someone with introverted feeling as their dominant or auxiliary function would probably be the more vocal about their boundaries being overstepped in regards to "content of discussion".
So an ESFP, ENFP, INFP, or ISFP are the ones most likely to protect their boundaries in regards to "content of discussion?" Surely you jest.:wink: Te doms and auxiliary users are much more likely to protect boundaries in almost any context.

niss63 said:
We are making decisions in the Thinking mode when we:

*Research a product via consumer reports, and buy the best one to meet our needs
*Do "The Right Thing", whether or not we like it
*Choose not to buy a blue shirt which we like, because we have two blue shirts
*Establish guidelines to follow for performing tasks

We are making decisions in the Feeling mode when we:

*Decide to buy something because we like it
*Refrain from telling someone something which we feel may upset them
*Decide not to take a job because we don't like the work environment
*Decide to move somewhere to be close to someone we care about
I'm not picking on Niss here, and I realize this was the authors attempt at illustrating Thinking vs Feeling, but I disagree that these examples above are an accurate way to determine a thinking or feeling preference of another person.
Oh yeah...niss is feeling picked on...:wink: Considering the author's disclaimer that we all use thinking and feeling preferences at different times, I basically agree with them.

Thinkers:

niss63 said:
*Research a product via consumer reports, and buy the best one to meet our needs
Feelers:

niss63 said:
*Decide to buy something because we like it
I disagree that these examples are a conclusive way of determining a feeling or thinking preference. I can't begin to tell you how many times I've read how Feelers do things without thinking things through (And these posts and articles were written by adults, not angsty teenagers.): "Oh my XXFX friend bought a specific car because it was cute", "Feelers would probably buy the adorable house that needs a lot of work instead of the structurally sound house that is outdated", "Feelers would more likely to marry an abusive spouse than a thinker would". Uh... what? It's as if Feelers don't have any common sense when they make decisions and are essentially slaves to their emotions. I freaking hate it.
As much as you hate it...the tendency is there. However, I do think that your are reading meanings into the statements that the author did not intend.

Don't take these statements to be an end all to knowing a particular type. However, if you know someone that researches almost every major purchase, and most minor purchases, on the web, in consumer reports, etc., before making a buying decision--you have a thinker on your hands.

OTOH, if many purchase are made because they feel right, like the color, think it's cute--you have a feeler on your hands.

This is influenced, in the amount of expression by culture and gender. A gal feeler will buy the car because it is cute or she likes the color, while a guy feeler will buy the car because he thinks it looks tuff or he looks hot in it. Same principle, different motivations.

And yes, those clichéd statements you posted are the tendency. It's not that they can't or don't think--but feelers do tend to subject their thinking to the emotional feeling side of things. That's why they are called feelers. Of course, my argument is that we stereotype those decisions as bad, not taking emotional intelligence into consideration.

Thinkers:

niss63 said:
*Do "The Right Thing", whether or not we like it
Introverted feeling (dominant function for ISFP and INFP, auxiliary for ENFP and ESFP) drives an individual to "do the right thing" so, again, this is not an accurate way of determining one's preference.
First, we'd have to define "the right thing." I'd think that Fi would lead you to make decisions based on what is right for you as you understand it, since Fi is subjectively driven. I interpreted the statement above as sucking it up and doing your duty, regardless of how you feel about it, which is more Te driven.

Thinkers:

niss63 said:
*Establish guidelines to follow for performing tasks
Feelers:

niss63 said:
*Refrain from telling someone something which we feel may upset them
I think the two quotes above are probably the most correct examples of how Jung defined thinking (analytical, sequential) and feeling (empathy, harmony) functions.
Again, the first is definitely a display of Te, and the second a Fe or Fi example, depending on motivation.

The examples are a bit vague, but if you read them as a whole, they do tend to indicate a feeling or thinking preference. However, they don't specify function.

Your turn at bat, Casey. (I guess the Rangers are playing again?)
 

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I think this conversation is great. Intelligent, challenging discussion is always a plus in my book. I'm just now sitting down to really read this, so I'll need to chew on it for a bit.

And yes, we should do something with the kids. Spending time with them will definitely illustrate why I'm a little... you know, insane. :wink: (Really, they're great.) And Mr. Tuttle talks smack already, but learned the hard way to not do so in front of me so deer camp would be a perfect setting for that. :proud:
 

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This is still a work in progress and hopefully I'll be able to finish it tonight, but we're down to just one computer and the husband has a mid-term paper due on Thursday. ( :raspberry: Mid-term. Doesn't he know that I have to finish this post??) I'll post what I have so far so it doesn't look like I've flaked out on this thread. :) I'd also like to state that I really did pass all of my English classes and that this is a very rough, unedited first draft. :p

Umm...keying in on superfluous, I'd view this as more of a posturing attitude related to insecurity. Seeking approval of others for the lack of self approval.
You know, I never really considered this. I've really enjoyed turning that over and seeing that possibility. I mentioned the S/N divide because I read once that sensors could be generalized as "a, b, c" thinkers and intuitives could be described as "a, b, 4, beta, Pi, c" thinkers (and laughed, because I totally relate to that). The non-linear, disorganized thinking needs to put into a logical sequence and would require more clarification thus leading to wordier conversation, whereas a sensor wouldn't have this problem. Although, another factor to consider would be the form of communication (written verses oral).

As for being laconic, I'd view that as more of an attitude of either not being interested in the topic or a lack of understanding of the topic--and this could be exacerbated by other factors such as being uneasy in the situation (such as an introvert in a crowd might be). Remember, the healthy introvert will talk at length about topics which they feel comfortable discussing in a setting where they are socially comfortable.
I agree with this.

So an ESFP, ENFP, INFP, or ISFP are the ones most likely to protect their boundaries in regards to "content of discussion?" Surely you jest.:wink: Te doms and auxiliary users are much more likely to protect boundaries in almost any context.
True. Very true. :wink: And I'm not suggesting that any other types are doormats. I would think this would relate to the maturity of the individual and not type-specific.

Oh yeah...niss is feeling picked on...:wink:
You're a grown man; I figured you could handle it. :laughing:

As much as you hate it...the tendency is there. However, I do think that your are reading meanings into the statements that the author did not intend.
You're probably more than right about that.

Don't take these statements to be an end all to knowing a particular type. However, if you know someone that researches almost every major purchase, and most minor purchases, on the web, in consumer reports, etc., before making a buying decision--you have a thinker on your hands.

OTOH, if many purchase are made because they feel right, like the color, think it's cute--you have a feeler on your hands.

This is influenced, in the amount of expression by culture and gender. A gal feeler will buy the car because it is cute or she likes the color, while a guy feeler will buy the car because he thinks it looks tuff or he looks hot in it. Same principle, different motivations.
I'll be adding more to this paragraph laterSee, I'm a gal feeler and at the ripe old age of 19 I chose to purchase a gently-used Honda sedan instead of a not-so-gently-used Jeep Cherokee that I absolutely loved because: 1) Honda reliability, 2) that year model of the Cherokee had many repair issues, and 3) better gas mileage.

The examples are a bit vague, but if you read them as a whole, they do tend to indicate a feeling or thinking preference. However, they don't specify function.
Right. And I think this is where a lot of people get hung up in MBTI theory (I certainly did!). As we know, personality temperaments are not simply a combination of four letters, but rather eight cognitive functions and our preference in how we use them. I think that going strictly by I/E, S/N, T/F, J/P dichotomies gives a pretty good idea of one's temperament but doesn't present the most accurate picture.

All in all, I think those descriptions would be more useful in determining your own type rather using them as a yardstick to measure someone else's T/F preference.

I'm on my way out the door for training and I'll have to add my responses to these later.
And yes, those clichéd statements you posted are the tendency. It's not that they can't or don't think--but feelers do tend to subject their thinking to the emotional feeling side of things. That's why they are called feelers. Of course, my argument is that we stereotype those decisions as bad, not taking emotional intelligence into consideration.

First, we'd have to define "the right thing." I'd think that Fi would lead you to make decisions based on what is right for you as you understand it, since Fi is subjectively driven. I interpreted the statement above as sucking it up and doing your duty, regardless of how you feel about it, which is more Te driven.

Again, the first is definitely a display of Te, and the second a Fe or Fi example, depending on motivation.
 

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Thanks for the read. I answer after you post the rest. *Feeling really rough tonight...mowed the grass and the allergies have me down for the count*
 

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Judging from the conversation between Niss and Tuttle I'd have to guess that Tuttle is your daughter.

If this is true, that's pretty interesting.
 

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So after I submitted my changes, I got the "too much time has elapsed" notice. I knew I shouldn't have stopped to fold that last batch of laundry. :p I've noted my new comments with " ** ".

Umm...keying in on superfluous, I'd view this as more of a posturing attitude related to insecurity. Seeking approval of others for the lack of self approval.
You know, I never really considered this. I've really enjoyed turning that over and seeing that possibility. I mentioned the S/N divide because I read once that sensors could be generalized as "a, b, c" thinkers and intuitives could be described as "a, b, 4, beta, Pi, c" thinkers (and laughed, because I totally relate to that). The non-linear, disorganized thinking needs to put into a logical sequence and would require more clarification thus leading to wordier conversation, whereas a sensor wouldn't have this problem. Although, another factor to consider would be the form of communication (written verses oral).

As for being laconic, I'd view that as more of an attitude of either not being interested in the topic or a lack of understanding of the topic--and this could be exacerbated by other factors such as being uneasy in the situation (such as an introvert in a crowd might be). Remember, the healthy introvert will talk at length about topics which they feel comfortable discussing in a setting where they are socially comfortable.
I agree with this.

So an ESFP, ENFP, INFP, or ISFP are the ones most likely to protect their boundaries in regards to "content of discussion?" Surely you jest.:wink: Te doms and auxiliary users are much more likely to protect boundaries in almost any context.
True. Very true. :wink: And I'm not suggesting that any other types are doormats. I would think this would relate to the maturity of the individual and not type-specific.

Oh yeah...niss is feeling picked on...:wink:
You're a grown man; I figured you could handle it. :laughing:

As much as you hate it...the tendency is there. However, I do think that your are reading meanings into the statements that the author did not intend.
You're probably more than right about that.

Don't take these statements to be an end all to knowing a particular type. However, if you know someone that researches almost every major purchase, and most minor purchases, on the web, in consumer reports, etc., before making a buying decision--you have a thinker on your hands.

OTOH, if many purchase are made because they feel right, like the color, think it's cute--you have a feeler on your hands.

This is influenced, in the amount of expression by culture and gender. A gal feeler will buy the car because it is cute or she likes the color, while a guy feeler will buy the car because he thinks it looks tuff or he looks hot in it. Same principle, different motivations.
See, I'm a gal feeler and at the ripe old age of 19 I chose to purchase a gently-used Honda sedan instead of a not-so-gently-used Jeep Cherokee that I absolutely loved because: 1) Honda reliability, 2) that year model of the Cherokee had many repair issues, and 3) better gas mileage. ** Okay, I don't really know or remember where I was going to this so I'm going to leave this as is. :blushed:

And yes, those clichéd statements you posted are the tendency. It's not that they can't or don't think--but feelers do tend to subject their thinking to the emotional feeling side of things. That's why they are called feelers. Of course, my argument is that we stereotype those decisions as bad, not taking emotional intelligence into consideration.
** I've really got to watch my projection. I think my knickers got into a twist due to the lack of qualifiers in the statements I listed above. However (touching on the bolded part above), I do take issue with how emotional intelligence is portrayed almost as a liability. In my own life, I have seen first-hand how utilizing the emotional, subjective layer along with the logical, analytical layer within my decision-making matrix has resulted in excellent outcomes. I'd be willing to bet that the others, be they thinkers or feelers, who also reason in this manner would be satisfied with their results.

The examples are a bit vague, but if you read them as a whole, they do tend to indicate a feeling or thinking preference. However, they don't specify function.
Right. And I think this is where a lot of people get hung up in MBTI theory (I certainly did!). As we know, personality temperaments are not simply a combination of four letters, but rather eight cognitive functions and our preference in how we use them. I think that going strictly by I/E, S/N, T/F, J/P dichotomies gives a pretty good idea of one's temperament but doesn't present the most accurate picture.

All in all, I think those descriptions would be more useful in determining your own type rather using them as a yardstick to measure someone else's T/F preference.

First, we'd have to define "the right thing." I'd think that Fi would lead you to make decisions based on what is right for you as you understand it, since Fi is subjectively driven. I interpreted the statement above as sucking it up and doing your duty, regardless of how you feel about it, which is more Te driven.
** After thinking about this a bit more, I totally agree with you and (yet again) I was projecting here.

Because I'm driven by introverted feeling, I rely on my personal values to guide my life. And those values were placed in me by an extraverted thinker. My Fi was shaped by my mom's Te. For example: Using your definition, my mom does "the right thing" because it's what she must do. She sees the task as a requirement of her (Te); something to cross off of her to-do list; it fulfills the duty assigned to her. I do "the right thing" because it's what my values say I should do. I have to uphold the ideal (Fi); to be perfect in my endeavors; be the model citizen, coworker, friend, etc. We both reached the decision to do the right thing but the motivations were totally different.

Totally unrelated to any of this: I honestly believe that an xSTJ and xNFP with similar values would have a slightly easier romantic relationship than if they were polar opposites. I can't fathom the amount of work that would have to be done to make that relationship run smoothly if they were very far apart.
 

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Example: she kept saying how she wanted to kick herself over what happened. Seriously?! Don't waste time in self-defeating behavior; just take the steps and get it done and over with.
That sounds like me and my ISTJ dad.

Me: "I feel bad about....."

Dad: "Stop it! Feeling bad wastes time & is unproductive. Here's what you do to fix it."


I love that about my dad.
 

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Judging from the conversation between Niss and Tuttle I'd have to guess that Tuttle is your daughter.

If this is true, that's pretty interesting.
No, Tuttle isn't my daughter. She and her husband are really nice people that we met and had dinner with, after meeting Tuttle in this forum.

On this forum: RobinHood is my son, MrsSmith is my daughter, and The Elite Zebra is my son-in-law. The rest of you are my friends.
 

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S

Totally unrelated to any of this: I honestly believe that an xSTJ and xNFP with similar values would have a slightly easier romantic relationship than if they were polar opposites. I can't fathom the amount of work that would have to be done to make that relationship run smoothly if they were very far apart.
Agreed. Mrs. Niss and I have very similar values. Without that bedrock foundation, I don't believe we would have attempted a marriage.
 

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No, Tuttle isn't my daughter. She and her husband are really nice people that we met and had dinner with, after meeting Tuttle in this forum.
What is the meaning of this meeting new people thing you speak of? Are you sure you're not an ESTJ? :wink:
 
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