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OMFG Another Dating Thread?

3765 Views 31 Replies 16 Participants Last post by  Rose Belle
Well I have been potentially dating for the last 4 months. So far I have queued up a few questions to intimidate the next potential with:

Are you a Christian who believes that depression is a spiritual generational illness which can be cured by prayer?

Are you going to envision me naked on a tarpaulin covered in baby oil before we ever meet?

Do you play the bagpipes?

Did you put yourself as "single" on this site within 3 hours of your wife (of 20 years) coming home and telling you she was sleeping with another man?

Are all your friends female and you are totally "in touch" with your feelings because of this?

Do you think my mind sparkles?

Do you have a daughter with an ampetamine addiction and allow her to borrow your car and give her you credit card with pin?

Are you so deep into BDSM and you are trolling for a submissive to stick brooches into her chest?:shocked:

Are you caring for your grandmother, have depression and foot drop and frozen shoulder and your dog just died?

Will you spend the entire date asking me personal questions about my exes without divulging your own whilst throwing in jibes about your ex (who you are technically still married to, thanks for telling me that chump) and her hairdressing bills and fanciful ideas on looking great (since she is actually an actress).

Were you addicted to heroin for the last 5 out of 6 years?

These examples are by real people.....none of them made up.

Has anyone else got any more questions which may indicate red flags that I can put on my list?
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Were you a hitman in the past?

Have you ever held Nazi sympathies?

Have you ever wrestled a bear?

How many cats could you take in a fight?

Are you a polymath?

Do you know how to drive a tank?

Have you ever plotted world domination?

Can you do 17 back flips in a row?

How many clowns have you killed?

Do you like to collect penguins in your spare time?
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This was a really great post to start the day with! Thanks for the giggle Bethdeth!

My ex-best friend is one those of Christians (not all Christians are like that btw, contrary to what John said), and the stuff I had to listen to...well, tell me if you need more anecdotes for one of your characters. There is a spirit for basically any kind of sin (in their opinion, NOT MINE), including homosexuality, a grandparent who was a free mason or a satanist, people who masturbate, a swearing spirit, horoscope spirit, etc., etc. Apparently they can also come through your t.v. or mirrors, so you have to bless those items with a prayer and some blessed olive oil. Yeah, really.

This and a few other religion related incidents screwed up our friendship. She got a fanatical vibe starting in 2006 and then it got really bad when she moved back to my town in Jan last year. She wanted me to be things I didn't feel comfortable with or believed in and she wasn't happy when I refused to join her church or bible study group. Man, the condescending and sanctimoniuos crap I had to listen to after that.

Then she had the bloody cheek to talk about how homosexuality is a manefestation of demonic possesion while we were in a restaurant with our best friends, one of whom is a lesbian, who sat right across the table from her and had to listen to every word! I gave up on her after that.

Can you imagine what John would've said and tried eventually? :crazy:
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