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Hello INFJs!

I find it hard to have fun with other people. My own ideas of fun do not match up with other's ideas of fun. For example, I'm not really a bowling, amusement park, or laser tag type of person. I prefer calmer activities, such as grabbing a coffee or lunch together, seeing a movie, or exploring a new town.

Can anyone else relate? What do you like to do for fun with the people you treasure?
 

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Hello INFJs!

I find it hard to have fun with other people. My own ideas of fun do not match up with other's ideas of fun. For example, I'm not really a bowling, amusement park, or laser tag type of person. I prefer calmer activities, such as grabbing a coffee or lunch together, seeing a movie, or exploring a new town.

Can anyone else relate? What do you like to do for fun with the people you treasure?
I'm the same as you.

Oh, I certainly can have fun bowling, an amusement park, or I suppose at laser tag; but it won't be because of where I am or what I'm doing there related to the site--it will be because I'm enjoying being with the person I'm with. Even a bad movie, even a bad experience, can be enjoyable because of the aspect of sharing it with a compatible companion. For instance, once upon a time a valet "lost" my car in a parking facility. The fifteen minutes I spent with him as we looked for it (ultimately successfully) were nothing but fun and hilarity.

Pleasure is maximized when I'm not only with someone I enjoy being with, but also doing something which relates to an interest of mine: Art Museum, Theater, Ballet, Opera, Botanical Garden, historical site, gym, and so on. These are activities which I can enjoy alone; but the enjoyment is redoubled when I share these treasures with someone who is also my treasure.
 

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The "normal" fun stuff like bowling, amusement parks etc... kinda wear me out. I do it so the people around me can have fun, not for my own fun.

My idea of fun is driving a car with one other friend (in this case ENFP) and explore! Take roads we never took before, go get a cookie or an espresso at a shop we've never been to.... talk out life,... stop at a lookout and enjoy the scenery.... but if you add another person, meaning 3 people total,... then it doesn't become fun for me anymore and becomes an energy management game. I can only be with one other person whole-heartedly.

But most of the time, it's staying home and playing games, watch a movie, cook something new, play board games or cards,... :)
 

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Same. I often end up compromising and going along with something so that at least I can spend some time with them. In particular with that thought, I'm thinking of the old friends I now only see a couple times during longer breaks from school, so every time we can get together becomes more important than what we do.

I don't have anyone I'd consider to be a very close friend now, when I think about it. But with my good friends at school, activities aren't such difficult things to figure out. We spend a lot of time together in the context of school, so we naturally have shared interests there. In architecture, we have a fair amount of group projects, but we also all work in the studio a lot and therefore spend a bit of time together even when working on our individual design project. Point being, creativity and and architecture and all the things we share an interest in by being there become natural shared activities. We also do things like go to the gym together, helping push each other to take care of ourselves and all that.

But yeah, outside of that, I certainly relate. The "free-time" activities I like to do are all relatively quiet, thought-provoking sorts of things. I can't say I've found someone I can truly share those with yet, aside from my parents at times.
 
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I distinctly remember having had fun in May 2001, ergo fun does exist. It's like the dodo - reportedly extinct, but in reality only almost.
 
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My idea of fun always involves 1-on-1 competition, not doing x with other people. For example; I like to play chess and whatnot, texas hold' em, virtual reality games that involve competition (especially destruction derby, fighting and strategy games), etc. but it doesn't mean I won't enjoy spending time together with exploring, having lunch together, etc. (it depends on the person). Talking with each other is enough for me but when I start to talk, people usually just listen and try to keep up with the conversation therefore it turns into a monologue which I dislike but not many people mind about it. I prefer to watch alone unless you won't be a distraction. Well, I suppose I don't have anything left to write about it. So... yeah.
 

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I've found that my fun is often very personal. I often have the most fun when playing a game that I can learn more about. I like to figure out complex systems by interacting with them.

Now, a lot of the games I find fun are great to play with multiple people. Many board and card games are fun for others, while still providing me with the things I find fun.
That way, there's often activities that people can enjoy in different ways.

I also share the problem that things that many people find fun aren't as fun for me, but I've found that there's a lot of people that actually enjoy the same activities that I do, which means that I get to have fun with these people.

So it helps to pick your friends based on shared interests.
 

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I don't relate, I have fun doing things such as that, and enjoy some friendly competition. Though in amusement parks, I have no idea how to have fun in them apart from spending money and being in the presence of others, and socialising. With those I treasure, we can literally be doing anything, I just want to talk with them.
 

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I would have had bowling, amusement park, laser tag, go kart, put-put golf, on my list of things to do for fun as a younger person. Just until I was zapped out of energy. And then I'd have the second list of library, computer room, etc.

As I got older, I might still have these but I would have them at someone's house or a private location. Or find some way to make it private. For example, when I go shopping, I try to minimize human contact =)

I love amusement parks, either the funhouse on Halloween or Haunted Mansion at Disneyworld, stuff like that. It's a small world at Disneyworld. Epcot... I realize you are actually alone in these, except the funhouse (unfortunately).

Seeing a movie, exploring a town is actually something I enjoy alone. And when I visited my parents, we did separate when we were in a new city. But with the right person, I imagine I could do these too.
I suppose I like to dive deep into these things, and then when I have my thoughts together, I share about it with another person.
 

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I can completely relate. I do not consider any of the activities that you mentioned as fun as well and rather like to go out for lunch/dinner, to the movies or maby a museum, the zoo, etc. I enjoy staying at home and activities that can be done at home but sometimes I need to get out and then the above mentioned activities seem good options.
 

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My idea of fun is driving a car with one other friend (in this case ENFP) and explore! Take roads we never took before, go get a cookie or an espresso at a shop we've never been to.... talk out life,... stop at a lookout and enjoy the scenery.... but if you add another person, meaning 3 people total,... then it doesn't become fun for me anymore and becomes an energy management game. I can only be with one other person whole-heartedly.
:)
Ditto !! :chuncky:
 
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I really enjoy quiet, low-stress walks in beautiful nature, but I tend to need new vistas all the time. Walking the same paths gets boring fairly quickly, except in exceptionally gorgeous places maybe. I don't like having a goal, like X miles per day or hiking to somewhere specific... I like getting some basic supplies - a bit of food and water, a little extra clothing - and just setting out with no goal in mind, see where I end up. Let the path decide. Ideally with only a vague idea of which paths there are and where they lead...
 
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