Personality Cafe banner
1 - 7 of 7 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
391 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Recently, I got into a little squabble in a thread about infjs and infps. The squabble isn't all that important, but I did gain some food for thought in the thread. One of the key issues that came up was that we tend to assume how a person feels, which makes sense because we use Fe quite a bit. The issue brought up is one I think about quite a bit, though. How accurate can our insights truly be? Don't get me wrong, Fe has been useful in the past. I got all of my jobs by reading body language, I'm a decent salesman, I generally know how to calm things down before they reach their breaking point, etc. However, I have also been wrong quite a bit and have misfired and/or made things worse. The truth is that we can only do so much with body language and behavior patterns. We are not mind readers. Peoples thought and emotional processes are complex and unique. I suppose acknowledging this leads to the question, just how authentic or accurate is our Fe? Do we really feel as other people do, or are we just really adequate guessers. Furthermore, based on this, how much should we trust our Fe insights?
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
3,530 Posts
Sometimes Fe made me take others' emotions rather personally, seeing them being directed at me or caused by me. Sometimes people's negative emotional current made me want to be a peacemaker, not bothering to find out why they felt that way.

Whenever Ni and Ti would contribute more, my conclusion and reaction would be more objective.

One good thing about Fe is that I am always able to look at a big picture later on (after the heat of the moment). I can say sorry if I made a mistake. I can forgive if the offender gives me good reasons. Fe is not so stubborn to enable me to let go.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
391 Posts
Discussion Starter · #3 ·
Sometimes Fe made me take others' emotions rather personally, seeing them being directed at me or caused by me. Sometimes people's negative emotional current made me want to be a peacemaker, not bothering to find out why they felt that way.

Whenever Ni and Ti would contribute more, my conclusion and reaction would be more objective.

One good thing about Fe is that I am always able to look at a big picture later on (after the heat of the moment). I can say sorry if I made a mistake. I can forgive if the offender gives me good reasons. Fe is not so stubborn.
Yeah, I've actually been criticized for that a lot by friends and family members. They feel that it is a sign that I don't hold my beliefs with enough conviction, or I am too passive. I don't really feel like that's the case, though. Arguing isn't really about winning, it's about understanding the merits of two opposing viewpoints. Unless you're just being a dick, then I don't really have time for it, lol.

Anyways, that is the "wishy-washy" side of Fe, I feel. We value our beliefs because we think about them and refine them a lot (Ni-Ti), but we also don't want to just throw away other people's opinions too, or at least we don't want a lingering bad feeling (Fe).
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
3,530 Posts
Yeah, I've actually been criticized for that a lot by friends and family members. They feel that it is a sign that I don't hold my beliefs with enough conviction, or I am too passive. I don't really feel like that's the case, though. Arguing isn't really about winning, it's about understanding the merits of two opposing viewpoints. Unless you're just being a dick, then I don't really have time for it, lol.

Anyways, that is the "wishy-washy" side of Fe, I feel. We value our beliefs because we think about them and refine them a lot (Ni-Ti), but we also don't want to just throw away other people's opinions too, or at least we don't want a lingering bad feeling (Fe).
I agree. Ti is where we hold our stance that's value based, not feeling based. Feelings come and go. We get it and we let it go. This is how INTJ works, too. Only in reverse. Their logic and rationale is not stubborn and can be changed. However, their Fi is rather stubborn once they make a feeling based decision.
 
  • Like
Reactions: 95410

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,442 Posts
I have noticed that Fe-users and Fi-users routinely misunderstand each other. This is my observation and not intended as a complaint: the INFJs around me tend to ascribe values, intentions and emotional processes to me and my nearby Fi-users that we simply do not have.

Fortunately, this mutual disconnect can probably be bridged by both Fe-users and Fi-users coming together and learning more about each other and about Fe and Fi.
 

·
Registered
ENFJ
Joined
·
644 Posts
ISFJ, but still Fe aux like you. Lately I'm having to drill it in to myself that I am not always accurate when it comes to "feeling other people's emotions." Particularly with certain ones in my life who tend to act, look, and sound upset, but then swear up and down to me they are not.

Of course, that makes me wonder what else am I wrong in that I always assume I'm right, like memories and "vibes" about people.
 

·
Banned
Joined
·
2,244 Posts
I've noticed many threads from INFJs claiming to have psychic powers, some end up in cat-fights.

Nobody can read minds. Fe can be wrong, as you said, and emotion by itself is purely irrational. I'd say it's always better to use your Ti for constant, live, unrelenting reality checks.:tongue:
 
1 - 7 of 7 Posts
Top