[JamieBond]

The intense analytical work I've done on the types of the guys I have had/want to have relationships with shows that, with a staggering majority, they are Js. xxTJs, specifically.

Do any other ISTPs get this, at all? I mean, the types that have characteristics opposite than mine do have the amazing power to annoy me, but it's like opposites attract. Except on the T/F. I adore Fs as friends. But for a relationship...

Anyways, there was a point to this post. Are you guys attracted to people with types diametrically opposed to yours?

 

[Benja]

Not at all for me.

For awhile I was spending a lot of time with an extroverted girl, some kind of ExFx, and randomly I met a really introverted girl through her roommate. It took an interesting event for the introvert gal and I to kind of break the ice, but we talked intensely for like five hours that day one on one. It was amazing finally feeling comfortable having a conversation with someone, we were both so damn introverted it was funny. She was probably an INFP and I've been looking for I's since then. Also, my dad's an ISTJ and my mom is an ISFJ and their J'ness really drives me crazy sometimes. Feeler's can be okay sometimes, but it's so difficult dealing with them if they're venting, I keep trying to solve their problem and they don't care about solving anything. Intuitives are also a little out there, sometimes I just can't communicate well with them.

I guess it depends on what you're looking for with a relationship. I've always had my eyes out for a loving companion that is similar to me, not someone who's opposite and isn't going to understand a thing I do and get in my way all the time.

 

[zynthaxx]

Could it be a gender thing that I see T type women more as friends while you have a romantic preference for T type guys?
But yes, I think there's some complementing potential between P and J types, optimally with an enhancement of each other's personalities. They learn to relax a bit, and we learn to finish what we started.

 

[Perturabo]

In the last few years I've been attracted to some shade of SF, a probable ENFP and an ENFJ.

Though out of like 25 people in my old school's social group I was only really friends with an INTJ and ESTJ, so I see what you mean about getting along with Te users.

 

[chrisu]

hard to say because i usually don't type-guess people and most are not interested in finding out their type.
and "attracted to"? i'm attracted to everyone with a nice bum!
INTP, INTJ, maybe ESFP, probably ISTP.
only preference seems to be IxTx... i'd say i'm not.

 

[MissFixit]

When it comes to relationships I can't deal with F types. It's way too exhausting.

Yes, I like XXTJs. ESTPs are wild fun too. Although as usual, I think being alone is still better.

I have wondered what it would be like to have a relationship with another introvert. It's never happened, probably because we are not social enough to meet each other. I attract extroverts exclusively.

 

[Vivian Melo]

i frequently get atracted to istj, but the relatioship doent last. it comes to a point where i dont see it going places anymore and it ends.

 

[reletative]

I usually like XNTPs, XNTJx, and XNFJs. I believe I am most attracted to either Ni or Ti in the Dom or Aux position, and Fe users over Fi users.

 

[DustyDrill]

I have been madly in love with an ESFP for the better part of a decade. No matter how annoying she gets, I can't stay mad at her. I understand her motivations instantly, every time. It makes it really easy for me (We share strong Se). But I'm sure she has trouble with my motivations, so I vocalize my Ti more often these days.

We're partial opposites, function wise. We share Se frequently, and she has Ni but mine is like the hulk to mickey mouse compared to hers.

I honestly think if you share functions, it makes things so much easier... but functions you don't possess can make things interesting temporarily. Come for the differences, stay for the commonalities.

 

[MyName]

I am almost always more attracted to P's

 

[The Mighty Quyn]

I'm attracted to extraverts. I'm a pretty reserved person except when I'm at work...I have to be outgoing at work, it's funny because people have the completely different perception of me at work compared to my friends outside of work.

I don't like judgemental people...normally. I do envy people who are able to make a decision and stick to their guns, but close-minded people are a no-no for me.

As far as "N's", I don't really like people to get inside my head and figure me out...because you never will...except me for me in the "now", because I change often not for any particular reason, I just jump from mood and activity often without any real causation.

"F's" have a tendency to irk me...I can be real understanding and empathetic to people and their situations, but after a certain point I'm ready to tell someone to get over it and keep it moving; no reason to dwell overly long.

So I'm not really attracted to complete opposites of myself, I really wish I could just find a more extraverted version of myself.

 

[Chipps]

I'm actually not a fan of Ps for relationships. They are too...accepting for me, too laid back. My T is pretty strong with a moderate J.


I dated an ISFP once, and uh....no.

I work with an ISTP, but I honestly couldn't imagine dating one. Maybe a more mature and developed one would be good.

I really dislike the ETPs as more than just loose friends. They are too playful socially and I'm too serious.

All of this has led me to believe that I'll probably end up with another NTJ, preferably type 8 with a 9 wing.

For me, opposites do not attract, even for friendship.

 

[Seralya]

- I am very strongly introverted, and I do think E:s are interesting. I would like to have a good extroverted friend who would drag me out to the society.
- I consider Ne and Fi kinda sexy, I guess, but I'm totally baffled by Ni and Fe. I seem to have communication problems with people that use introverted perceiving functions - our world views seem to be very different.
- NT-types are sort of interesting but in the end they'll bore me with their neverending stories.
- I find J-types annoying. Somehow I always end up feeling defensive. If it is also someone that reasons totally differently from me, I will start feeling attacked and frustrated, sooner or later.

 

[n2freedom]

Not at all for me.

However, I'm waiting for n2freedom to come out for a visit. She claims that it's because I've never encountered an ENTJ on this level. I am doubtful she will change my mind. But we will see...

There .... I fixed your post for you. LMAO! :wink::wink::laughing::laughing::tongue::tongue:

 

[Benja]

There .... I fixed your post for you. LMAO! :wink::wink::laughing::laughing::tongue::tongue:

Lol. Still waiting..., you E's are all talk, no do!

 

[n2freedom]

Lol. Still waiting..., you E's are all talk, no do!

LOL! Shhhh! You're not suppose to let the cat out the bag.

 

[Eliza. Peace to you.]

I wonder if anyone has had this experience in longer term J/P relationships:

"...the difference in Judging-Perceiving causes a great deal of friction in close relationships. The irrational behaviour of Perceiving types may be unexpected and unpredictable for Judging types, creating more obstacles. In return, the rational behaviour of Judging types forces Perceiving types to follow rules, plans and schedules which will most likely make their life miserable."

Because that has been my experience in the past. I am so used to adjusting to J ways in my personal and work life. Now I find being with my ISTP extremely easy! I have entertained concerns on how my ISTP and I will get things done, being both P's, but so far we do things together quite well. I remind myself of the times J's weren't running my life, and realize I did accomplish plenty, in my own way and time. Absence of psychological stress increases productivity...

@DustyDrill, my ISTP's young adult daughter is ESFP. According to Socionics that is an "Illusionary" relationship, and that description describes their relationship perfectly! Of these it is said:

These are relations of growing laziness. There are no other intertype relations that can deactivate partners so much as Illusionary relations. Illusionary partners find it comfortable being relaxed together, discussing different subjects. What one partner is talking about is always interesting, but in order to understand the partner better the other partner needs to force themselves. This difficulty in making an effort also makes achieving goals together almost impossible...

Here is the full text: Illusionary relations between psychological ("personality") types I wonder if that relationship description seems to fits the one you are in?

 

[DustyDrill]

@DustyDrill, my ISTP's young adult daughter is ESFP. According to Socionics that is an "Illusionary" relationship, and that description describes their relationship perfectly! Of these it is said:

These are relations of growing laziness. There are no other intertype relations that can deactivate partners so much as Illusionary relations. Illusionary partners find it comfortable being relaxed together, discussing different subjects. What one partner is talking about is always interesting, but in order to understand the partner better the other partner needs to force themselves. This difficulty in making an effort also makes achieving goals together almost impossible...

Here is the full text: Illusionary relations between psychological ("personality") types I wonder if that relationship description seems to fits the one you are in?

The trick is to stay independent of each other in your goals. Which both types have no problem with. We come together at the end of the day and have fun, but we don't need to be attached at the hip to be content. We play to our strengths, which is a mutual respect for independence and good times.

Because I understand functions to an extent, it's really easy to keep things harmonious. I'm sure her end is harder, because I'm ISTP and complicated in terms of relationships. And she has little patience for such things as MBTI. So it's on me to be more open and healthier in general.

I think laziness has happened with us in the past, when we both thought we needed to be attached at the hip to be considered a couple. Now, the second time around, we both realize that's bullshit.

 

[Benja]

I wonder if anyone has had this experience in longer term J/P relationships:

"...the difference in Judging-Perceiving causes a great deal of friction in close relationships. The irrational behaviour of Perceiving types may be unexpected and unpredictable for Judging types, creating more obstacles. In return, the rational behaviour of Judging types forces Perceiving types to follow rules, plans and schedules which will most likely make their life miserable."

Both my parents are likely J's, ISTJ dad and ISFJ mom. It's really frustrating, my brother, sister, and I are all P's. My parents always want things done very specifically and think there's only one way to go about doing things. Really by the book, never experimenting or getting too creative and always shooting down my great ideas.

 

[JamieBond]

Both my parents are likely J's, ISTJ dad and ISFJ mom. It's really frustrating, my brother, sister, and I are all P's. My parents always want things done very specifically and think there's only one way to go about doing things. Really by the book, never experimenting or getting too creative and always shooting down my great ideas.

My mom and my little sister are J's, and my dad and I are P's. Guess who gets along with who, lol. But there's definitely friction between my mom and my dad when he does things off the cuff and she can't plan for them, or when she wants to plan for, say four months ahead and he can't plan for what shirt he's going to wear tomorrow...