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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I hear alot (be it in the media, real life, etc) that many (heterosexual) women (specifically) give oral sex as a special treat ONLY on their significant other's birthday.

Do you do this? does your significant other do this? why do you think this is the case?
 

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Ace of Spades
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I hope people don't do this. The poor souls.
 

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Never really understood this myself. I suppose I can see why a woman who really disliked giving oral would do such a thing... but otherwise, it seems odd. (Also, if someone really hated doing it, like they were absolutely disgusted and/or traumatisd by it, they shouldn't have to do it any day of the year.)

Anyway, no, I don't do this. Despite not being a very sexual person at all (I could easily go the rest of my life without having full-on sexual intercourse and without receiving any sort of sexual pleasure myself), I actually do really enjoy giving oral. I'd be rather disappointed if I only got to do it once a year, hahaha. On the flip side though, (yeah, I know this is mostly about hetero women giving oral to their partners, but still), having to receive it even just once a year would be awful. I've tried to like it numerous times, I really have... but it's one of the most unpleasant activities I've ever endured in my life. It's not that it feels bad, nor that I'm worried about, er, taste or smell (I'm rather neurotically clean), it's just so damn creepy. My crotch is not a place I want anyone's head, thankyouverymuch. It's about as appealing to me as another person attempting to pick my nose. I think I'd grow to dread my birthday if I was required to receive this, er, "gift".
 

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This is a weird concept indeed...I'm going to lock this memory (along with the other stuff) in the secret compartment of my brain that will never get out.
 

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If you partner hates doing it so much that they only do it once a year as a "present"....it seems it would be rather hard to enjoy it.

I think i'd be thinking the whole time "He hates doing this....he is not enjoying this....I am the only one enjoying this.."

yeah it would not be fun.
 

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Discussion Starter · #9 ·
Never really understood this myself. I suppose I can see why a woman who really disliked giving oral would do such a thing... but otherwise, it seems odd. (Also, if someone really hated doing it, like they were absolutely disgusted and/or traumatisd by it, they shouldn't have to do it any day of the year.)

Anyway, no, I don't do this. Despite not being a very sexual person at all (I could easily go the rest of my life without having full-on sexual intercourse and without receiving any sort of sexual pleasure myself), I actually do really enjoy giving oral. I'd be rather disappointed if I only got to do it once a year, hahaha. On the flip side though, (yeah, I know this is mostly about hetero women giving oral to their partners, but still), having to receive it even just once a year would be awful. I've tried to like it numerous times, I really have... but it's one of the most unpleasant activities I've ever endured in my life. It's not that it feels bad, nor that I'm worried about, er, taste or smell (I'm rather neurotically clean), it's just so damn creepy. My crotch is not a place I want anyone's head, thankyouverymuch. It's about as appealing to me as another person attempting to pick my nose. I think I'd grow to dread my birthday if I was required to receive this, er, "gift".
wow, im surprised that anyone wouldnt enjoy oral sex, or that you couldl go without sex for the rest of your life without missing it. I guess people are just different. Do you ever wonder if maybe you have only had partners that werent very good in bed?
 

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As a guy, I would actually percieve this as something out of sympathy / pity .... in any case it's not 'special' if it's a one time thing especially if my partner doesn't like it and 'gives' it as a 'gift'. Not to me anyways.

But I'm not judging. Sex is something where both people derivr pleasure and if I know my wife/SO is giving me something not out of free will or love and has to make a 'special ocassion' out of it like a birthday or whatever and wouldn't do it 'normally' ... i don't want it.

I probably wouldn't even be able to get aroused by it because of all that emotional disconnect.
 

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Wow, I wouldn't stay with any guy who'd only go down on me on my birthday, and no guy should be with a woman who won't give him regular oral, if that's what he really loves.

If it's not something either party enjoys doing - seriously enjoys - they should at least be upfront about it.

Sexual compatibility is way important.
 

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wow, im surprised that anyone wouldnt enjoy oral sex, or that you couldl go without sex for the rest of your life without missing it. I guess people are just different. Do you ever wonder if maybe you have only had partners that werent very good in bed?
Nah. Actually I've had only one partner (my husband), and he's certainly not bad in bed at all. We're just both... different, haha. We actually met on an asexual discussion forum and both still identify as somewhere in that range of things. (Asexuality doesn't mean you can't still enjoy sex -- we both do very occasionally -- just that you don't experience sexual attraction. [Which is not the same thing as romantic attraction.] We've done a fair amount of experimenting, mostly out of curiosity.) But anyway, it doesn't matter to me how awesome someone might be in bed... I'm just not really interested too much in sex in general, even if it feels good, and I'm fairly repulsed by receiving oral. My girly bits are just a no-go zone as far as anyone's head/mouth. A good example would be that it's kinda like if you take someone who's 100% straight and suggest that maybe they just haven't found the right same-sex partner who's great in bed, and that if they did, they'd be gay after all. Just isn't gonna work, haha.

I'm honestly surprised I like giving oral so much -- I sure as hell didn't expect to. I do though, and my husband enjoys receiving (he was actually very turned off by the idea until I convinced him to let me try and that I didn't find it degrading or weird), so there's not really a downside. :ninja: Haha. That said, the part that I enjoy best is simply that I get to do what essentially feels like playing a game with someone else's body. It's fun to watch the reactions, kind of like having a tickle fight. I don't especially see it as sexual, if I'm honest... but whatever, as long as I like doing it, I'll keep doing it. Besides, I get the impression that my husband enjoys receiving oral more than being mercilessly tickled, haha.
 

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Nah. Actually I've had only one partner (my husband), and he's certainly not bad in bed at all. We're just both... different, haha. We actually met on an asexual discussion forum and both still identify as somewhere in that range of things. (Asexuality doesn't mean you can't still enjoy sex -- we both do very occasionally -- just that you don't experience sexual attraction. [Which is not the same thing as romantic attraction.] We've done a fair amount of experimenting, mostly out of curiosity.) But anyway, it doesn't matter to me how awesome someone might be in bed... I'm just not really interested too much in sex in general, even if it feels good, and I'm fairly repulsed by receiving oral. My girly bits are just a no-go zone as far as anyone's head/mouth. A good example would be that it's kinda like if you take someone who's 100% straight and suggest that maybe they just haven't found the right same-sex partner who's great in bed, and that if they did, they'd be gay after all. Just isn't gonna work, haha.

I'm honestly surprised I like giving oral so much -- I sure as hell didn't expect to. I do though, and my husband enjoys receiving (he was actually very turned off by the idea until I convinced him to let me try and that I didn't find it degrading or weird), so there's not really a downside. :ninja: Haha. That said, the part that I enjoy best is simply that I get to do what essentially feels like playing a game with someone else's body. It's fun to watch the reactions, kind of like having a tickle fight. I don't especially see it as sexual, if I'm honest... but whatever, as long as I like doing it, I'll keep doing it. Besides, I get the impression that my husband enjoys receiving oral more than being mercilessly tickled, haha.
Maybe your Husband feels the same about doing it for you, no?
 

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I highly doubt that is the majority. Some of us are lucky enough to celebrate birthday's everyday ;)
 
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Discussion Starter · #15 ·
Nah. Actually I've had only one partner (my husband), and he's certainly not bad in bed at all. We're just both... different, haha. We actually met on an asexual discussion forum and both still identify as somewhere in that range of things. (Asexuality doesn't mean you can't still enjoy sex -- we both do very occasionally -- just that you don't experience sexual attraction. [Which is not the same thing as romantic attraction.] We've done a fair amount of experimenting, mostly out of curiosity.) But anyway, it doesn't matter to me how awesome someone might be in bed... I'm just not really interested too much in sex in general, even if it feels good, and I'm fairly repulsed by receiving oral. My girly bits are just a no-go zone as far as anyone's head/mouth. A good example would be that it's kinda like if you take someone who's 100% straight and suggest that maybe they just haven't found the right same-sex partner who's great in bed, and that if they did, they'd be gay after all. Just isn't gonna work, haha.

I'm honestly surprised I like giving oral so much -- I sure as hell didn't expect to. I do though, and my husband enjoys receiving (he was actually very turned off by the idea until I convinced him to let me try and that I didn't find it degrading or weird), so there's not really a downside. :ninja: Haha. That said, the part that I enjoy best is simply that I get to do what essentially feels like playing a game with someone else's body. It's fun to watch the reactions, kind of like having a tickle fight. I don't especially see it as sexual, if I'm honest... but whatever, as long as I like doing it, I'll keep doing it. Besides, I get the impression that my husband enjoys receiving oral more than being mercilessly tickled, haha.
huh, so theres an asexual website? this is interesting.
 

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Maybe your Husband feels the same about doing it for you, no?
He does say that he enjoys it, yeah, but it's not a huge drive such that it bothers him not to do it either -- and he knows I find it almost traumatising to receive (I've reacted very badly at times, including lots of crying, repulsion and regret), so he's fine not doing it. Knowing that it's something I don't like makes it more or less a turn-off for him. We've pretty much left it such that if I ever change my mind, he'll be happy to try it again.

And @Mendi the ISFJ, yep, there's an asexual site -- The Asexual Visibilty and Education Network (aka AVEN).

And I'll stop derailing this thread now, haha.
 

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I can't imagine only wanting to give someone oral on their birthday, I enjoy it too much. However, I can imagine my partner only wanting it that often, sex isn't her favorite activity anyway and it took some coaxing to get her to let me try it at first. Thankfully it's something that she does enjoy on occasion, but I wouldn't be surprised if she changed her mind for whatever reason and didn't want it anymore. Oral is not something I demand from her, she doesn't enjoy giving it at all and I can live without it. There are other sexual acts that I enjoy being on the receiving end of much more.
 

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Whyyyy? haha... I feel like the problem with oral sex is more that people are afraid that the man wont reciprocate. I know many girls whose boyfriends refuse to go down on them because "its gross" and expect the girl to perform regularly. That doesnt fly in my book, but I could see how a complex could develop
 

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People enjoy this somehow? :dry:

"You can only rape my mouth on your birthday. That's the only day I won't file charges."

Yeah. No thanks, ma'am. I'd rather it never happen. Ever.
 
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