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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Greetings All! :happy:

For some time now, I can't really recall how long, I've been feeling kinda strange and I can't seem to pin down the cause. Most days, I feel as if I'm on the outside looking in at my life. I don't really feel like myself..or, at least, I don't feel like the "normal" me I remember from a few years ago. I feel like I'm inside my mind and my body, but it doesn't feel like *me* for some reason. I wish I could think of a more eloquent way to describe the sensation, but words are failing me at the moment. I've been struggling with self-esteem and self-confidence issues for quite a while...maybe years of doubt and negativity directed toward myself have finally snapped something loose inside my mind.

Thought / opinions? Any and all will be greatly appreciated! Thanks in advance
 

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21 Posts
Discussion Starter · #6 ·
A thousand apologies for the delay in my response; been quite busy and emotionally drained as of late. Thanks to everyone for their responses! :happy:

what's important to you? what do you feel is most relevant in your life moment to moment?
are you living your life in a way that prioritizes those things?

think of your absolutely ideal lifestyle... what you would do if there were no practical/material boundaries to attaining it. now what about your current lifestyle is most suppressing your ideals? what can you change right now that will bring you closer to an experience that's relevant for you?
I think my ideal lifestyle at this point in my life would be one where I could be completely open about my sexuality; a life where everyone important to me knew exactly who I was so I didn't have to maintain this charade all of the time. I suppose the only thing really holding me back from actually doing this is my parents. I'm really afraid coming out to them will only do more harm than good. The last thing I would ever want to do to them is intentionally inflict pain, and I can only surmise that telling them the truth about who I am will do more harm than good. So, for now, I have chosen to bear the burden myself while I try to figure out what I want to do. I really think this is the source of much of the emotional baggage I carry...it is absolutely exhausting to wear my "public face" all of the time. I really feel like two different people sometimes...and my "real" self has more fun and is more confident than my "straight" self.
 
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