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Although I have accomplished many things, I've never really had the courage to 'launch myself' with dedication into my passions - against the 'better' judgement of friend/family expectations, and outside of standard disciplinary-frameworks external to myself (i.e. university etc.) and so on; I feel this pining, a need to have someone really close, to *cough cough* complete me, and hold me up through my struggles, before I engage in those struggles.

I see these struggles as immense tasks requiring long-term dedications. Things which use my talents, and which I can achieve easily I can do fine, but when contemplating the big things, I sorta feel over-awed and can barely begin them --collapsing out of breath, I put them away for later (as ideas) never to be completed. I really want someone to be there with me through that struggle.

One problem is that, I think, my lack of faith in myself (?), and my inability(?) to dedicate myself with discipline to life-project esque tasks is an impediment to me finding someone to be my support, to "complete me", because to others it may seem that I am an empty vessel without accomplishments.

Now, I am sure there are many INFP on here who can relate (of course there are!). But I really want to know what the solutions are? How have you solved this issue? Do I simply need a kick up the ass or something i.e. just GET STARTED?

I'm getting older (28) and it's really silly.

P.S. I want to write novels (part time vocation).


I feel that way too, and I recently made the mistake of asking a prof I like to be my mentor, but what I hadn't considered dangerous was we are incompatible. So, now we are in an awkward place not being able to move away from the commitment.

I want to be a writer too. But hey here's the deal. When I feel incomplete or ill-equipped than people I know, I remind myself that this is one chance we get at living. And we can't afford to sit back and decide "why" we aren't able to do things that we need to be doing. This struck me when I was watching Tim Burton's Alice in Wonderland. Seriously, if a man could actually write stuff like that, and years later somebody with an excellent imagination is able to recreate it for us- I mean, we are allowed to what we want.

In my case, my barriers are my own frameworks and expectations. I have images of what I want to be and I drive myself crazy trying to get there- but nothing happens because I believe I haven't got enough of experience.

I think if you tried harder or maybe took it lightly it might work out. DOn't make it sacred or ideal in your head, then it would work. I painted a broken egg shell this evening- for fun- but people actually loved it and said some amazing things about it. Maybe you should give yourself some rope and enjoy things you are doing. It might work out you know. :)

Happy living!
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