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I have always had the feeling that something was wrong with my family even though everything seemed to be perfect. The last month I have had an insight that it has to do with narcissism. My parents doesn´t have any diagnoses but I have always known that my mother is selfcentered, naive, always wants to be good and can´t stand being criticized. My father has been emotionally distant and self-absorbed.

I wonder if this is where my fierce Fi stems from? Having to stand up emotionally for myself and not having healthy boundaries in the family. I have had to figure out my own values of what is right and wrong when it comes to relationships...

I don´t mean that everybody with a similar background would turn out to be an INFP. I was probably born an INFP and because of that I was more sensitive to the narcissistic behaviour, was aware of it to some extent and tried to fight it... Being so aware also made me prone to absorbing all the negative feelings, feeling the darkness and being masochistic...

Has anyone else had these kind of thoughts? It´s like being Alice in wonderland running around down below after finding the rabbit hole... How to deal with the mighty Queen is the problem for me now that I have realized that I was probably worse off than I have imagined...
 
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