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Do you have an INTP advice hotline? How much do you charge per minute?

I'll have to hit you up for some brief words of wisdom moments before the next time I decide to jump out a perfectly functional airplane as an anxiety buster.
The line would probably just be a soothing lady's voice hooked up to an answering machine which repeats "It'll all be okay. The fear is only in your mind," (or something) constantly until the caller hangs up.

It would probably save millions of lives.
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