I just want to say I love this forum its like I can actually talk with like minded people
I might go on for a bit with this post .
Im one of those people who almost never gets angry I usually take the crap people give me and think myself out of confrontation(damn imagination) and it builds up, I have always been a prime target for bullies because of this but physical bullying never really phased me in some respects it taught me you have to be able o defend yourself hence I do train in mixed martial arts now. But back to the point, I do sometimes just tick and go absolutely berserk sometimes at the wrong people.
Now ive had a two week break from 6th form Its 5:37 I have been up all night doing maths and now I am taking a break and thinking. I have noticed I think I am getting bullied but in a very new way and it really annoys me I have lots of groups but the one who I associate with the most the science people(Around 6-10 guys, Same lessons etc.) enjoy telling me to shut up all the time. Granted I am very annoying at times but its getting out hand now and its usually the other extroverts who do this sadly I rarely confront them for reasons aforementioned, but later on I postulate why I take that crap. Now these are not people I dislike, most of them are lovely people at times but when around all of them in a group environment everything turns nasty, If I want to elaborate on things in class its like shut up or I try and talk about something its shut up.
I never reply straight away but I do remember however whenever I get round to dishing out dirt myself I go soft because the guy I don't know did something friendly. I think this is really my Fi function screwing me I get stressed a lot.
You might be thinking so whats the problem well I really really don't want to go crazy sometime soon and lash out because I nearly did last year but came to my senses and laughed it off. It will just end up with me looking like a prick. I like hanging with introverts since they are usually more accepting of me and I can have deep 1on1 talks with em but I have very few of those people in my classes so its annoying. There is this one girl who always wants to stick up for me but I never let her I really dont know why I tell her everything and she gets really angry, and I hate making scenes.
Its funny because I think the fact I am so I dont know nice? is always abused and it makes me colder and more bitter every day. I just hope one day I dont snap. Its funny because Im so selfless I always help out my brother in fights no matter what but I rarely want to risk hurting someone to protect my peace of mind. I just come home and kick craters into my heavy bag.
BTW: please dont tell me to tell a teacher I'm 17 thee should be some other way of dealing with this.
and I dont really need a solution I just wanted an excuse to type my heart out.
I might go on for a bit with this post .
Im one of those people who almost never gets angry I usually take the crap people give me and think myself out of confrontation(damn imagination) and it builds up, I have always been a prime target for bullies because of this but physical bullying never really phased me in some respects it taught me you have to be able o defend yourself hence I do train in mixed martial arts now. But back to the point, I do sometimes just tick and go absolutely berserk sometimes at the wrong people.
Now ive had a two week break from 6th form Its 5:37 I have been up all night doing maths and now I am taking a break and thinking. I have noticed I think I am getting bullied but in a very new way and it really annoys me I have lots of groups but the one who I associate with the most the science people(Around 6-10 guys, Same lessons etc.) enjoy telling me to shut up all the time. Granted I am very annoying at times but its getting out hand now and its usually the other extroverts who do this sadly I rarely confront them for reasons aforementioned, but later on I postulate why I take that crap. Now these are not people I dislike, most of them are lovely people at times but when around all of them in a group environment everything turns nasty, If I want to elaborate on things in class its like shut up or I try and talk about something its shut up.
I never reply straight away but I do remember however whenever I get round to dishing out dirt myself I go soft because the guy I don't know did something friendly. I think this is really my Fi function screwing me I get stressed a lot.
You might be thinking so whats the problem well I really really don't want to go crazy sometime soon and lash out because I nearly did last year but came to my senses and laughed it off. It will just end up with me looking like a prick. I like hanging with introverts since they are usually more accepting of me and I can have deep 1on1 talks with em but I have very few of those people in my classes so its annoying. There is this one girl who always wants to stick up for me but I never let her I really dont know why I tell her everything and she gets really angry, and I hate making scenes.
Its funny because I think the fact I am so I dont know nice? is always abused and it makes me colder and more bitter every day. I just hope one day I dont snap. Its funny because Im so selfless I always help out my brother in fights no matter what but I rarely want to risk hurting someone to protect my peace of mind. I just come home and kick craters into my heavy bag.
BTW: please dont tell me to tell a teacher I'm 17 thee should be some other way of dealing with this.
and I dont really need a solution I just wanted an excuse to type my heart out.