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Just reading through an old'ish thread and saw the comment;
~ I have a serious crush on someone here* ~
(*here meaning = PerC)

Is this a thing?
Crushing on a PerC member we don't know irl?

Sure, I can understand being caught up in people who have similar attributes we connect with, but that's just common interest, isn't it?
Are the PerC interactions in threads and via PM being conflated with emotional connection?
I'm sure many of the members establish friendships in PerC and often communicate privately, but is that truly a sign of a 'Crush' though?

Me?
Sure, I get excited by members who intellectually stimulate me, especially if they have clever wit!
Conversely, i'm also drawn to the 'feelers', they tend to convey a sense of peace and security for me (my weakness).
But do I crush on them? Probably! But in terms of needing more interaction with them in PerC!
Maybe deep down I have a desire to know them better, know their 'real world' as such.
Although, so far, I haven't developed a crush on anyone (that I know of lol .....).

Which takes me back to the orignal question.
Are we really crushing on each other?

(As opposed to friendships.)
 

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My first thread was about this topic itself
:embarass: And even now i am not over him. But here ,i don't think, i have a crush because i recently joined it but still if people continue to be so kind and polite to me, I'll probably develop a crush :D

Canis Lupas /##/
 

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I crushed on a woman on social media several years ago when I had hardly been on social media for very long. But I've learned that imo text relationships aren't real relationships. I don't look for women online, and I don't even look for friends online. If by chance a text friendship develops into a lot more than text, then then, and only then will I consider it a real friendship or a romantic thing. Real life friendships and relationships have proven to be much more emotionally fulfilling for me. I did meet my last gf online, but we developed into much more than texts before we became a couple, and now we're still friends that often talk to each other on the phone and hear each other's voice. We met in person once too. We were an ldr. I've also learned from that that I won't do the ldr thing again with anyone.
 

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Are the PerC interactions in threads and via PM being conflated with emotional connection?
Yeah I think people can crush on other people on the internet, though I have yet to verify what a crush is (just going off Wikipedia here). We can definitely have emotional connections.
 

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I crushed on someone here without looking for it. We got married and are waiting a baby boy. It is possible to crush on someone on PerC! Like you said you start by getting mentally interested/stimulated by maybe one specific person and then you message privately and you just "connect" and keep chatting, and just upgrade the interactions with time etc... ;)
 

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Also, a lot of PerCers might not only have intersected on Perc. I know I’ve been in chats with other Percers several places over the years. Also met some IRL.

So they might have interacted elsewhere as well. Which might make it even easier to establish a connection. (Chat, PMs phonecalls, video chat etc).


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
 

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It's real, but it's not real--the feels and vibes are real. But online crushes are just online, they don't always transfer to rl, they're different universes. I've met several people irl that I connected to on forums, some crushes, some not, that's how I met my partner. I like to pretend that when I meet somebody in person that I met online, crush-or-not, even if I've PMed/chatted/texted/voiced them a lot, that I'm meeting them for the first time.
 

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Keep it simple:

People usually connect best when there's shared interests, hobbies, and so on. PerC is not dating platform but a shared interest/hobby. People have specifically looked for this website and invested their quality time and energy into it.

Knowing this, the connections with people you make on here are mostly of higher quality, it forms a great basis (especially since this is so personal, self-growth-emphasised and psychology-like) for deeper and stronger connections, when meeting new people. It makes all the sense that friendships, relationships, etc- come from it.

That's basically it.
 
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