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So I had a fight with my mom at the beginning of the new year. My Mom and I didn't speak for a couple days and I snapped because she says I don't appreciate anything she does when I more or less do anything and everything she's ever asked me to do. I guess part of the reason my temper went off wasn't just because of this argument but because the realization that I'm twenty six well almost twenty six and I live with my mother has finally hit me.

What really made me mad and made me unwilling to make any form of apology is that she accused me of wanting to move out because I don't like doing chores or something which is crazy right? I mean I was sleep deprived but I'm pretty sure that's what she said. My mind spent the next few days racing making plans and I was little surprised at the level of initiative I had been taking even gave thought to becoming an actor it was completely random at that point of my breakdown or whatever I was thinking I wanted to do something anything with my life.

I feel like no one has ever taken me seriously or respected me. I hate it and I want to change that or at least try and change it. I mean I'm going to be 40 in 14 years I want to married and on my own by then. I feel like for all my mom's occasional talk about wanting me to get a license all she really wants is to keep me under her thumb and the more I pull away the angrier she gets.

Perhaps all it was, was a mental breakdown or maybe I was just waking up all I know is I don't want to have her be the center of my life.
 

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I don't really know what your life plan situation is like, but it seems to me that she wants to assure that you will have a stable future. That usually includes having an income, being able to handle life on your own, and preferably knowing what you want to be doing with your life. It can also be especially hard for mothers to part with their children. Push you away to make you realize that you have to take charge of things, and at the same time pull you in because they doubt if you're ready to fend for yourself out there. I guess it's nature's way of driving us nuts so that we'll finally leave.
 
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Totally normal to be having these feelings at 26. I moved out of home at 18 so yeah I know what it's like to want to be independant. We're supposed to separate from our parents at some point so this isn't a breakdown its the natural feeling of wanting to flee the nest. I doubt your mother wants to keep you under her thumb but it's just as hard for her to see you as anything other than her child. My mother still sees me that way and I'm over 40 and have been out of the best for a long, long time. Lol. It's parents, you'll always be their child to them. But for your own sanity yeah you probably need to move out soon if you are able.
 

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If it's troubling you, think about this way:

Do you want to leave or stay? Assuming you want to leave, your mother's argument will likely be that you are egoistic and don't take her feelings into account.

From her perspective then, leaving = egoistic and staying = taking her feelings into account.
But how does it look from your perspective? Isn't she wanting you to stay egoistic and her allowing you to leave taking your feelings into account?

Regardless of what you do, one egoistic will will win. Will the will to win be your mother's or yours? But I read in another post of yours to live the way you want to live. To listen to yourself and not be ashamed of making your own decisions.

Then don't worry about leaving. It's only natural. She's the one being egoistic for wanting you to stay. Keep that in mind and call your own shots.
 

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Be thankful that you are waking up to this early in life. There are definitely certain benefits to you living at home, or else you would not be living at home. When the drawbacks outweigh the benefits, you will move out. If you want more respect, I really suggest moving out. As long as you live under her roof, she views you as her property and because the house is technically her property you have to abide by her rules, which sucks when you are 26 and trying to individuate. Moving out and paying your own bills are a fast way to gain respect from parents...good luck!
 
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