[Nezumi]

I was wondering if personality type had any bearing on someones preference for either the dominant or submissive role.
The stereotypical female submissive (think the girl in "Secretary") seems like an NF to me, while the stereotypical Dominant seems rather NT-ish. This would explain the attraction they have for each other, anyway
So can you all help me by listing your type and preference? With explanation, if you like!

 

[Whimsy]

I'm an INTX and I prefer to be more submissive. I don't like to lead but neither will I follow an abuser or idiot. My partner needs to be intelligent and strong in his own identity and able to show compassion and warmth. If he can do that, then he is worthy of being followed. If he isn't strong I will stomp all over him. If he isn't warm and compassionate (towards me, at least), he won't be able to win my heart and trust.

You can think of me as a wild cat, tamed for the circus -- willing to submit for the right motivation and to a strong handler but always looking for a weakness I can exploit. Treat me with respect and affection and I will do as you ask. Bully me or neglect me and I'll eat you alive.

 

[Arioche]

An ENFP, and I'm usually in the dominant role.

This is due to my naturally assertive/active/domineering personality, however, and is not a case exclusively limited to romantic relationships. I consider my partner as my equal, and see no reason to hold them down or force them into submissive role (I find over dependence, lack of self confidence, and 'selling short' to be unattractive, especially if they're "acting the part" on purpose). Optimally, I prefer relationship in which both parties can be independent and authentic, and hold mutual respect for each other and their competencies. If this requirement is met, assignment of sub/dom "role" is of little consequences. I just let things proceed naturally, and as I tend to end up in the "dom" role, I am fine with it as long as my partner feels comfortable with it as well.

As for type preference, I usually go for the INTJs (my current partner being one,) there's something about the complementary Ne-Ni and matching judging function that takes the connection to a whole another level. That being said, there are too many individual differences within the group to definitely place favouritism on a certain type. I do know that I'm usually not too good with someone with high Si or Fe, though.

 

[Neon Knight]

ESFP I like to trade roles but I think I'm more dominant, but I've mentioned elsewhere how much I'd like to be thrown down once in a while...

 

[SyndiCat]

I'm no masochist, but I want to have my way with you, then pull your wings off so you won't escape.

 

[Nezumi]

I'm no masochist, but I want to have my way with you, then pull your wings off so you won't escape.

*smirks* Well Masochists usually aren't dominant, that's Sadists, dear. And your personality, Sir?

 

[Harley]

I've always considered myself just sort of "there". Preferably I would like to have the dominant/submissive roles in a relationship interchangeable so that when I'm up she's down, and when she's down I'm up. Sort of a constantly changing yin-yang things. If I feel like I'm constantly taking charge, or that I'm constantly being babied, you betcha I will end it. I like the power struggle, and the competition that comes with one trying to outdo the other, it just makes everything more fun and guarantees the relationship will never be boring.

 

[Malovane]

INFJ.

I do enjoy being dominant, but also being submissive at times.

Life's full of variety. Learn and enjoy.

I suppose I was like Harley for a long time... the constant power struggles were fun. After a couple love-hate relationships, I suppose even that has gotten a little bit boring. Maybe I'm just getting old, but see stability and growth to be more important.

 

[SyndiCat]

*smirks* Well Masochists usually aren't dominant, that's Sadists, dear. And your personality, Sir?

Six with Five-Wing

 

[midnightblonde]

INTJ, dominant.

 

[Nezumi]

INTJ, dominant.

*laughs* trust an NT to be the first one to actually give me the information i was looking for in the first place. Thank you, Sir.

 

[White Flame]

INTP female and I tend to be dominant.

It is only with an incredibly strong relationship, with an intense level of trust that I will allow myself to be submissive. And even then, it is only for brief periods because that dominant side wants to take over.

 

[Tkae]

INFP, Submissive :blushed:

 

[Vanitas]

ENTJ, dominant.

 

[LostInMyOwnMind]

Allow me to throw a wrench in the works here. In a true Ds relationship it's the s who is in control. Being s requires the s to give something of themselves, to surrender to the D. The D just takes.

 

[scarygirl]

INFP, very submissive. xD. I'm serious you guys xD

 

[Vanitas]

Allow me to throw a wrench in the works here. In a true Ds relationship it's the s who is in control. Being s requires the s to give something of themselves, to surrender to the D. The D just takes.

In D/s scene setting, I realize this seems to be the case (and thus why I don't like the whole 'roles' thing, feels too fake). I answer mostly in the sense of .. relationship dynamics.

Someone bound to wear the pants anyway.

 

[fractal life]

INFP, submissive. Sometimes I am dominant but that's only if my partner hints that she'd like me to be so rather than out of personal preference. So I guess that just shows how submissive and eager to please I am...

 

[Nezumi]

Allow me to throw a wrench in the works here. In a true Ds relationship it's the s who is in control. Being s requires the s to give something of themselves, to surrender to the D. The D just takes.

I actually think this is why I have met so many NT dominants. NT's generally are not interested in control for its own sake. I have found them to be button pushers, however, and the dominant role lets them push the buttons of someone who wants their buttons pushed. its win-win.

While someone is bound to wear the pants in any relationship, I find that in my experience, both NT's and NF's dislike the pretending that goes on in hiding this fact, and would rather tackle the issue deliberately. With the intense need to please felt by most NF's and the NT fluency at both planning and button pushing, it just seems to work well. however this is just my experience and observation, your mileage may vary.

 

[topgun31]

ENTJ, dominant

Although I like taking a break from being the dominant one once in a while, out of my own choice. So, in a subtle way, I'm still dominant