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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I just learned about what MBTI functions actually mean, and I noticed that mine are really screwed up, so I'm now going to try to personify them as characters. So basically, I'm going to give names and backstories to the voices in my head. You can try to do that with yours too if you'd like.

I'll talk about my Si first. While this wasn't my first function to develop, when it did, it took control of everything and screwed up all of my existing functions. Enter Jet Steel: The responsible ISFJ fatherly figure to the rest of my functions, which would be fine if he wasn't an oppressive bastard. Jet, in his early years, was a handsome practical boy. He was quiet and not particularly popular, but everybody generally got along with him, although his strong sense of paranoia always gave him the suspicion that his classmates were laughing at him rather than with him. Then one day, Jet grew up, went off to war, and returned home as a battle-scarred misanthropic nihilist with severe PTSD. After having seen the world and what it truly had to offer, he wanted nothing more to do with it. He began to hate every living human being and to want them all to die so that there could finally be peace in the world.

Then one day, Jet joined my other functions: My Ti and Ne. I'll talk about my Ti first. The INTP Eric Wallace, as a child, was considered a prodigy. He loved science, especially dinosaurs. But as he got older, he found it hard to take care of himself, but eventually, he didn't have to because Jet came along and became his caretaker. His oppressive paranoid caretaker with PTSD. Jet taught Eric to despise the academic system. Upon being brainwashed to realize just how bad it was, Eric gave up his interest in biology and became an alcoholic. As the line between reality and fantasy began to blur into nonexistence for Eric, he legally changed his name to Dragonflame Sunblade and became an occult magician. He now spends most of his time summoning elementals or at least believing that he is able to.

And then, there's my Ne. Jaymon Rivera was a hyperactive, creative, and generally fun ENTP of around the same age as Eric (or as he now prefers to be called without abbreviation, Dragonflame.). But since neither of the boys had parents, Jet (due to his unhealthy ISFJ instinct) became their foster father and really screwed them up. There was once a time when Jaymon wanted to make friends with everybody, but then Jet taught him that all people are inherently evil and that he can't trust anybody because they will always betray him because he knows from experience and Si always knows best. This caused Jaymon to become a rebellious anarchist, and while he didn't legally change his name, he now prefers to go by the nickname "Jag". Not because it starts with "Ja" like his original name. Not because it's short for "Jaguar", a Mexican animal, representing his heritage. But, because the name "Spike" is too mainstream. Jag now remains mostly under the oppressive control of Jet, but the more he is forced out, the more he will lash out and argue and be the middle finger in the face of society.

And then, there's my Fe. My poor screwed up Fe. The last to join the group. One day, Jet, Dragonflame, and Jag found a small abandoned ESFJ child. He didn't have a name, so Jet decided to name him X and train him to be an assassin. X's first word was "revenge" because Jet had brainwashed him to believe that the the entire world had wronged him and taught him to despise all of humanity and told him he existed to kill everybody. As an adult, X still has a one-tracked mind and seeks revenge without reason. He's also always crying and smiling at the same time: crying because Jet abuses him and brainwashes him to believe that every living human being hates him and smiling because he carved a smile into his own face with a knife.
 
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While this sounded like a fun game at first, you seem to be having quite a lot of problems. I wouldn't mind offering my ear (more like eyes but you get the point) if you need someone to talk to. Not that it is any of my business, but still.
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
While this sounded like a fun game at first, you seem to be having quite a lot of problems. I wouldn't mind offering my ear (more like eyes but you get the point) if you need someone to talk to. Not that it is any of my business, but still.
Basically, I'm autistic, and everybody picked on me in my childhood, and now I hate people and am afraid to socialize with them.
 

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Basically, I'm autistic, and everybody picked on me in my childhood, and now I hate people and am afraid to socialize with them.
I'm always surprised by how little effort the government makes to lessen bullying. How can it not see what an immense impact it has on people?

I feel your pain. I've always had difficulty socializing which led me to become a recluse. I've always been extremely strong which stopped anyone from physically bullying me, but the insulting was painful nonetheless. I too became antagonistic towards humanity, thinking everyone was selfish and only interested in their own enjoyment, no matter the damage to others.

My saviour was a group of people who were basically the nerds of the school. With them I found safety to be myself. I started playing videogames with them regularly and had a lot of fun. Simultaneously my rage disappeared and I became more relaxed. Those days where the first time after 5 years of highschool that I laughed, I'm not kidding.

Right now I'm alone again, but that experience made me more accepting towards the outside world. I no longer believe everyone to be an enemy, which is why I'm now constantly looking for people who I can share my interests with. I still have social anxiety, so I'll never be a high profile kind of person, but it atleast made me less paranoid (I still don't trust anyone fully though).

I guess the message in this all is that there are definitely people around who will accept you. All you need to do is be open to the chance of things getting better.
 

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Discussion Starter · #5 ·
I'm always surprised by how little effort the government makes to lessen bullying. How can it not see what an immense impact it has on people?

I feel your pain. I've always had difficulty socializing which led me to become a recluse. I've always been extremely strong which stopped anyone from physically bullying me, but the insulting was painful nonetheless. I too became antagonistic towards humanity, thinking everyone was selfish and only interested in their own enjoyment, no matter the damage to others.

My saviour was a group of people who were basically the nerds of the school. With them I found safety to be myself. I started playing videogames with them regularly and had a lot of fun. Simultaneously my rage disappeared and I became more relaxed. Those days where the first time after 5 years of highschool that I laughed, I'm not kidding.

Right now I'm alone again, but that experience made me more accepting towards the outside world. I no longer believe everyone to be an enemy, which is why I'm now constantly looking for people who I can share my interests with. I still have social anxiety, so I'll never be a high profile kind of person, but it atleast made me less paranoid (I still don't trust anyone fully though).

I guess the message in this all is that there are definitely people around who will accept you. All you need to do is be open to the chance of things getting better.
Most of the people who accept me are INFPs just because they're basically the nicest people in the world, but they're no fun because they don't usually talk. What doesn't help is that I tend to be idolized by people who are even more mentally challenged than me (like low-functioning autistic people), and it hurts because everybody else starts to group me with those people when I am way more intelligent and self-conscious than them.
 

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Most of the people who accept me are INFPs just because they're basically the nicest people in the world, but they're no fun because they don't usually talk. What doesn't help is that I tend to be idolized by people who are even more mentally challenged than me (like low-functioning autistic people), and it hurts because everybody else starts to group me with those people when I am way more intelligent and self-conscious than them.
Now you yourself are looking down on others. So basically you want to be accepted by the 'normal' kids, and don't like being associated with people of lower social ranking.

Who cares what 'everyone else' thinks? As long as you are comfortable, nothing else matters. I get the feeling you are simply too picky. It sounds like there are quite a few people who have no problem with you, yet you feel they are not good enough for you (the INFPs are not 'fun' enough and the the mentally challenged ones are not intelligent enough).

Considering you yourself (like everyone else) are not perfect, have you ever thought about lowering your standards? I'm sure an autistic person isn't the easiest to deal with (I can relate to a lot of symptoms related to autism and my mother says I'm quite a difficult child), so perhaps you are not giving enough credit to the people who are willing to be with you.
 

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Discussion Starter · #7 ·
Now you yourself are looking down on others. So basically you want to be accepted by the 'normal' kids, and don't like being associated with people of lower social ranking.

Who cares what 'everyone else' thinks? As long as you are comfortable, nothing else matters. I get the feeling you are simply too picky. It sounds like there are quite a few people who have no problem with you, yet you feel they are not good enough for you (the INFPs are not 'fun' enough and the the mentally challenged ones are not intelligent enough).

Considering you yourself (like everyone else) are not perfect, have you ever thought about lowering your standards? I'm sure an autistic person isn't the easiest to deal with (I can relate to a lot of symptoms related to autism and my mother says I'm quite a difficult child), so perhaps you are not giving enough credit to the people who are willing to be with you.
Most people are actually nice to me now because I'm in college and everybody's mature now, but I'm still depressed because my Si retains the memories of when people weren't nice to me. And sometimes, when people are nice to me, I feel like their condescending me.
 

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Most people are actually nice to me now because I'm in college and everybody's mature now, but I'm still depressed because my Si retains the memories of when people weren't nice to me. And sometimes, when people are nice to me, I feel like their condescending me.
You need to let it go, otherwise it will just start eating away at you. If things are better now, remember the moments you have with your new friends. Don't give the people you used to know the pleasure that you are still being affected by them. Think of it as starting over. Forget everything that happened to you before college and act like you have been reborn. It worked for me.
 

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Discussion Starter · #9 ·
You need to let it go, otherwise it will just start eating away at you. If things are better now, remember the moments you have with your new friends. Don't give the people you used to know the pleasure that you are still being affected by them. Think of it as starting over. Forget everything that happened to you before college and act like you have been reborn. It worked for me.
I can't forget all that I know.
 

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I can't forget all that I know.
Then you will carry around this depression for the rest of your life. I wish there was an easier way to say this, but there isn't.
Instead of thinking about the dark past, think about the bright future. The past is gone, think about what has yet to come instead.
 

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@Xahhakatar bumping in because I think you need a little cheer up!

Sweetie, I completely agree with @Ninjaws - You can't keep on carrying this pain for your whole life! Even if it means "unlearning everything you know", it's better than living your life feeling like everyone hates you, especially when this is not the truth at all. You're gonna have to learn to let things go, to get over the obstacles. Like you've said, people are mature now and I think it will make a difference- people have troubles accepting people who're slightly different, but as they grow up they learn to accept each other, just like they'd accept you.

I'm not saying you should become a friendly, social and trusting individual because that's not you, and you shouldn't unlearn everything you know. But you do need to learn new things, to know people and make amends with them.
 

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Everything is temporary. The whole world is in a state of constant evolution. It's like a seed, that is growing into a tree.

In this life, we have to learn, improve, and be a better person, no matter how we started.

It's good to remember the past. But don't forget that the past has good sides, and not only bad ones.
 

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Actually, I think it's okay to learn from the past and to remember it, but keep your eyes up for the future! If you'll be optimistic about people, they'll give you the same treatment ;)
 

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Discussion Starter · #16 ·
Then you will carry around this depression for the rest of your life. I wish there was an easier way to say this, but there isn't.
Instead of thinking about the dark past, think about the bright future. The past is gone, think about what has yet to come instead.
But, the past is my fuel.
 

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I think Jaymond and Eric should unite and laugh at X and Jets poor use of their function... Jaymond and Eric shouldnt speak to X and jet, let x and Jet follow and learn the uniting powers of Jay and Eric. You know what, Jaymond and Eric should enslave X and Jet, make them do what Jay and Eric dont care to do, if X and Jet disobey they get temporarily exiled. They will learn how to behave eventually, Jet needs to understand what he did...
 

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I dont know much about cognitive functions but when my Ni came into being and it resorted in the full awakening of my schizophrenia and hypnagogia i was exposed to this vast amount of creativeness which I now use as a tool to get through life, its like I dont know any other method anymore besides my creativity, if I want to do the practical way of things I have to resort to my Te and Ti which is evenly matched you can see below in my signature, I then take a slow approach to everything and become more focused but thats the time I always win which makes things more boring, I honestly find it more awesome to take risks like getting myself depressed, or blitzing in a 90 minute chess game etc. to make life seem more appealing, its all good and well if you win but it appeals more when Ive done it via instinct which is my Ni ,only my Ni is about way above average and it leads me astray more than on the "right" path

my Fi and Si comes into play when I'm with others or around others, couple those two with my Ni and then I start to feel out things and use my own subconscious to deliver sound judgement on things around me,if I couple that action with my creativity my imagination sparks to life as if everything just clicked into motion from a dead still stand and clock starts to move, my speech becomes rigidity but my motion is fluid as if guided by the source itself , in those moments, i know what I want and i keep it real

my minor functions Se, Ne and Fe, I dont know how they work in my life but yeah mahn, this is a life worth living, although I have schizophrenia and a creative genius thats still about halfway dormant I feel its time to let the beast come out and play , the power to combat the conventional with the unconventional with your whole being is an ecstasy beyond reason

damn I know how to forge silver out of words though ;)

btw E4w5 here :D

rarity has its perks but uniqueness evens more so

my Ni is like a black shadow thats expanding through life, my shadow, thats slowly becoming 3D, it takes the form of a bird and then i extend my arm, as I do this my shadows wings moves in sync behind my back ,and I click my fingers above my head and then I take off through the crimson night skies full of shining stars
 

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Once you leave college, schoolyard bullies will look like fluffy bunnies compared to the people you encounter.
Disagreed.
It's one of those popular sayings from those who undermine bullying and scarring at a young age.

Not saying that her memories should prevent her from living or that the world isn't a ruthless place but bullying can be the cause of various disorders, traumas as well as leading to suicide.

I feel like this thread is being swayed out of topic far too much. @Ninjaws' comment was genuine concern but this bandwagon of pseudo sympathy is probably quite bothersome for the op.
They never asked for any feedback on their private life anyway.

^ This is my Fi
She's quite the lunatic but sort of charming in her sturdy, weird ways.
Ne is the absentminded one that will daydream of everything while accidentally leaving pots on fire for hours
Si is a bit old fashioned, she lives in her own memories and hoards pets. Always trying to clean up Ne's act.
Te is organized, structured and logical. She tries to operate at her best but gets frustrated by the lack of attention her three sisters give her, to the point that she blows up into dictator mode under stress.
 

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Ni is my guardian angel, always protecting me, anticipating, and giving me insights. Thanks to her, I have the strength to control my life through time and planification. She gives me random information about things, and give me their pattern so I understand them easily.

Fe is the peacock, pretty and colorful. Thanks to this peacock, people like me and I can reach their heart easily. I can cheer them up and make them laugh with my jokes. It makes the world a bit more colorful and beautiful.


Ti is the bookworm. His job is to gather as much knowledge as possible, and structure them into the library. I really need it to conceptualize accurate plans.

Se is a dark monster that is stuck in a cage. It is so powerful and fearful, but it's too dangerous to let him go out alone. He would probably kill my guardian angel, and it will not be a good idea. Maybe someday I will control him, and he will help me succeed in my life.
 
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