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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
:happy: On Friday, it was confirmed that this guy in my class likes me. Yay, feeling is mutual. He has decided he doesn't want to get into a relationship right now because he is working through some trust issues from a previous relationship. Anyway, we are communicating with one another (and it is deep and wonderfully meaningful).

Here are my most recent scores based on the humanmetrics jung typology test

Your Type is
ENFJ
Extraverted Intuitive Feeling Judging
Strength of the preferences %
22 62 50 56

His preferences are
E - 33
N - 50
F - 50
P - 22

I was very surprised he tested as a an extrovert.

Based on these, what do you think the possibility difficulties might be? successes?

I thought to post on the INFP forum because you all are so insightful and I am usually around here & have made some strong relationships with you folks.

Thanks!
 

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Don't base too much on the tests. Forced choiced tests (ie. Choose A or B type tests) are not highly regarded for accuracy. That's why people get so different answers when they take it, because it depends on their current emotional state and their current values at that moment that strongly affect how they answer. I prefer questions like: please give directions from Point A in your town to Point B in your town? Or please describe your room, what's the most important item in it, where do you place it? Those are the questions aren't less prone to mood swings.

Back to your question, all your problems at first will be values and expectation problems and those are related to personality type. If you don't know his values demonstrated values (what his life shows as important to him by what he surrounds himself with and where he spends his time and energy) instead of his stated values (what he tells you is important to him) then you'll wonder why he says one thing and does something else.

Also, I find that shared problems build stronger more lasting bonds then shared interests. People who are trying to solve the same life problems tend to connect more than people who have the same taste in movies and books.
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
I prefer questions like: please give directions from Point A in your town to Point B in your town? Or please describe your room, what's the most important item in it, where do you place it? Those are the questions aren't less prone to mood swings.
Me too. They are far more context specific.

Back to your question, all your problems at first will be values and expectation problems and those are related to personality type. If you don't know his values demonstrated values (what his life shows as important to him by what he surrounds himself with and where he spends his time and energy) instead of his stated values (what he tells you is important to him) then you'll wonder why he says one thing and does something else.
I agree with this wholeheartedly. I find that this is what I am "looking for" / "spotting" through conversation patterns, are the decisions,choices, experiences, outlooks, those things that are shared/ not shared (or shared to some degree). It is all sort of subtly done without total directness. We feel comfy with each other so far. Though, much more is to come.... It is difficult because we have known each other a very short time (had classes together last semester, but only started talking this semester). Things are deep and wonderful so far (even at a friendship level - which I think all great, meaningful romantic relationships evolve from)... though I am cautious that nothing more than friendship may come out of it -- which time will tell.
 
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