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I should be asleep right now...

A long time ago I was on anti-depressants. I wrote a lot... a lot of poetry. It was easier for me sketch and draw and I felt much more inclined to be creative. Since I've been off the drugs for several years, I haven't written but one poem a year, usually when drunk. :/

I feel like something is missing because I never bothered to fully cultivate my creativity. If I didn't pick up an artistic skill immediately, I gave up. I have many artistic interests but not the will power to actually pursue them. I have also an obsession with getting the "right" materials to paint or sketch or what ever, and won't even bother to try until I've got them.

I have, also, really rotten handwriting... I've tried to improve it, but it feels like a lost cause.

In any case... advice... or commiseration would be appreciated. I don't really know where I want to go with this post... but thank you.
 
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Well, I'm not an INFP but, I used to have depression. I found that being depressed led me to be more creative sometimes. Do you think that maybe it had less to do with the drugs and more to do with the depression?
 

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Well, I'm not an INFP but, I used to have depression. I found that being depressed led me to be more creative sometimes. Do you think that maybe it had less to do with the drugs and more to do with the depression?
Yes, art is like an internal way of expressing your deepest unexpressed emotions.
 

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Oh god, I find I can be VERY creative when I am depressed, writing sylvia plath-like poetry, but it just makes me more depressed and I tend to not follow through. I found when on AD's, I still am creative, but not so dreary, and I don't go into debilitating depression. You can find some of my writing/lyrics on my tumblr for reference of how dark I can be sometimes, and I even kept the REAL dark off of it. I also have pretty, uplifting stuff too. It goes both ways. I'm sure a lot of infps can relate to this.

Artisdead.tumblr.com
 

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You think you are more creative when on anti-depressants? Try weed, that'll put you're creativity into hyper-drive.
 

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i used to take stuff for depression too, it motivated to write A LOT ... BUT after i got off the "creative high" if you will i reread what i wrote and looked back with disgust. it seemed dishonest cause the drug motivated the creativity not my emotions or deepest feelings.
i stopped taking anything for depression forever ago and i don't miss it, i utilize being sad for all its worth.
well... that wasn't helpful :crazy:
 

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Eh, but aren't your emotions and deepest feelings affected by the drugs your brain does or doesn't naturally produce? Yeah drugs will make you think and behave differently, but the ideas have to originate from somewhere.

Never taken prescription meds, but now I am interested to see what they would do. :p
 

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I just had my anti-dep dosage upped today. I'm hoping it doesn't get in the way of my creative side too much.
 

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i was actually worried that the anti-depressants that i was prescribed and taking were limiting my creativity... by putting me in a, "middle," sort of place away from emotional extremes...
 

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I actually wrote a lot more when I was depressed. Writing has always been one of my main lifelines, escape routes, and coping mechanisms. It's how I sort through things, it's how I avoid things, it's how I give back to others when others have given me so much. Now that I am no longer depressed, I usually don't feel especially motivated to write, unless I have a muse. Yeah, women are usually the source of my inspiration these days. Don't have one right now, and I'm not writing at all. Sigh.
 

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I know the feeling of having the artistic abilities but not the will to use them. For me I think it's because I need a reason to create something. When I was in a band, I wrote songs all the time. Now I don't do that so much anymore. But when I smoke weed I'm more able to create something solely for the sake of creating it, because I'm living more in the moment.. It's not a recommendation, merely a statement...
 
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I'm not very creative - well, not in a structured real way but I can definitely empathize. When I was having my first bout of major depression (from when I was like 11 till 14), I just felt more, so so much more. It was really wonderful in some ways and I miss some of that emotional intensity. If I were a creatively inclined person, that would have been my peak period of production for sure.
 

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I took fluphenazine for most of middle and high school, if you consider apathy and being passed out all of my 8-11 grade years creativity then I was Da Vinci.
 
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