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Discussion Starter #1
First of all, this is my first post so hello :proud:

Well, since I was younger (am 14 now) I've always been interested in psychology. From what I've read about the Myers-Briggs, INFJ make excellent psychologists. What I don't understand though, is that I've also read that we are greatly affected (and, of course, "way" to interested) by other's problems.

What I'm asking is: Even though we would help the person with a problem a lot, wouldn't an INFJ eventually bottle up ALL those problems and "explode"?


Keep in mind I'm new to the personality type thing...this is just from a few posts I've read online.

Thanks


PS: Pardon grammar.
 

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It is possible to explode as you say and quit common. For instance an INFJ who takes in an situation from a overdriven Fe for someone may become extremely sensitive about the "subject' at hand. This may lead an INFJ to become paralyzed as to say towards a person till they become effected to the point that this can cause excess stress and dilemmas for them. Sometimes we come across toxic people that become of such a great drain for us and ini the end can cause us to implode.
Many more examples of this, really depends on the individual and how they balance out their functions.
 

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They say counsellors need to be counselled themselves so perhaps if you have a good outlet to recharge and relieve your stress, the job will become less draining. I find that meditation or going for a walk helps calm my emotions, so does confiding in a friend. If you were a therapist you'd probably have some sort of mentor you could go to in order to learn better coping strategies. Other things like art, sports, relaxation, personal development.. whatever you like to do in your downtime shouldn't be neglected if you were overextending yourself beyond emotional stability.

Bc of our empathy we may take on others' feelings as our own and feel stressfully responsible for them.. sometimes helping the patient figure out their problems can shed some insight on how it can be a personal lesson for us too (don't know about anyone else, but I am notoriously bad at taking my own advice...). Sometimes the patient's problems remind us overwhelmingly of our own, and in specific cases need to be referred to another therapist.

I tend to detach better when dealing with others' feelings, bottle up my own feelings more and have occasionally exploded.. that's probably bc I don't have a consistent confidant or faithful perspective to fall back on... I fit the stereotype of being overly interested in other people's problems :p
 

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In all jobs you tend to soak in work problems as your own. How many people go back home in bad mood each day because of something happening at their work? How many people will be thinking about these things tossing and turning in their beds at night? And any time you work with other people there is some kind of internal group politics going on. I don't think psychology is significantly different in this respect.

I think INFJ tertiary function helps out with this. When I was in teens I could not envision myself being a psychologist because I was very easily affected on emotional level by things that were going on around me & overly sensitive. But then in 20s and 30s INFJs start to develop introverted thinking. This function allows one to detach from personal element, think about things logically and clearly without becoming emotionally invested.

So I think INFJ can make a good psychologist but it is certainly not something obvious early on. We're kind of late bloomers in this respect, but I also think think that one needs some life experience before counseling others - it is not something you can easily do right after graduating college at age 22. My INFJ aunt was pretty much drifting through life working various jobs in her 20s and then in early 30s she decided that she will study to become a psychologist. This is what she works as now - seeing clients, giving them advice with their problems.

your avatar is very INTP-ish btw lol - just like I imagine a typical INTP to be like :p
 

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Discussion Starter #5 (Edited)
They say counsellors need to be counselled themselves so perhaps if you have a good outlet to recharge and relieve your stress, the job will become less draining. I find that meditation or going for a walk helps calm my emotions, so does confiding in a friend. If you were a therapist you'd probably have some sort of mentor you could go to in order to learn better coping strategies. Other things like art, sports, relaxation, personal development.. whatever you like to do in your downtime shouldn't be neglected if you were overextending yourself beyond emotional stability.

So in short, everyday sports, music, walking and all that + a counselor for myself should prevent an INFJ counselor having problems?



In all jobs you tend to soak in work problems as your own. How many people go back home in bad mood each day because of something happening at their work? How many people will be thinking about these things tossing and turning in their beds at night? And any time you work with other people there is some kind of internal group politics going on. I don't think psychology is significantly different in this respect.

I think INFJ tertiary function helps out with this. When I was in teens I could not envision myself being a psychologist because I was very easily affected on emotional level by things that were going on around me & overly sensitive. But then in 20s and 30s INFJs start to develop introverted thinking. This function allows one to detach from personal element, think about things logically and clearly without becoming emotionally invested.
Well I'm kind of the same...but what interests me is (I know it will sound "cheesy") how I could improve other's lives. And most of the time when I have a problem myself I don't need help solving/dealing with it...just need someone to hear it and I feel better.



your avatar is very INTP-ish btw lol - just like I imagine a typical INTP to be like :p
Well who knows; I've only taken online tests and I doubt those are 100% accurate...from what I read the only thing I *think* I have in common with INTP's is over analyzing things. But I'm 2000% sure, if the character House is INTP, I'm far from one. I just like his character in a "this guy would be sad IRL but is funny on TV" way

But I've taken about 5 online tests and in all 5 there are about 3 questions I have to look up word meanings online, so that might change something. Who knows, I guess I'll just keep reading into it



Thanks to everyone for the answers, really helpful :)


Edit: just read this (can't post link, its a thread about what INFJ's struggle with) now I'm 100% sure I'm INFJ
 

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THe only really hard difficulties for me when I go out into the world, is when I feel like I have failed my enviornment. sometimes I need appreciation for what I am trying to "give" everyone.

I can imagine being a counselor and thinking it would be a really fufilling job for myself. Mainly because once you hear someone's problem or issue in their life, pushing them into that positive dirrection and pressing their emotions into a positive direction would leave me very very satisfied. Now, If I couldn't affect the others emotions I would feel like a failure. If I can't get people to laugh about their problems at the end of the day and see the good in life than i feel I have failed.

The world hurts me to much when people are not positive or are being fun, or just living on that "bright" side of life. I feel like I have failed as an empathetic person and it puts a lot of strain on my own emotions.
typically I love positive group atmoshpere so I often feel a job in an area like that would be great, but where I really excel is getting others to feel good about the future.

and that energizes me a lot and makes me feel really great. so why not do it for a living. I don't really see a problem. :)
 

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Discussion Starter #7
THe only really hard difficulties for me when I go out into the world, is when I feel like I have failed my enviornment. sometimes I need appreciation for what I am trying to "give" everyone.

I can imagine being a counselor and thinking it would be a really fufilling job for myself. Mainly because once you hear someone's problem or issue in their life, pushing them into that positive dirrection and pressing their emotions into a positive direction would leave me very very satisfied. Now, If I couldn't affect the others emotions I would feel like a failure. If I can't get people to laugh about their problems at the end of the day and see the good in life than i feel I have failed.

The world hurts me to much when people are not positive or are being fun, or just living on that "bright" side of life. I feel like I have failed as an empathetic person and it puts a lot of strain on my own emotions.
typically I love positive group atmoshpere so I often feel a job in an area like that would be great, but where I really excel is getting others to feel good about the future.

and that energizes me a lot and makes me feel really great. so why not do it for a living. I don't really see a problem. :)
Oh yea yea. If you are a psychologist and you don't get affected by other problems, you shouldn't be one (thats just my opinion) What I meant was that if INFJ's are...well "over-affected" by them.

And I agree, I can't be in sad atmosphere without thinking how to fix it. And yea, now that I read the responses about how you could deal with being affected by other's problems just the same way you would as it was your own problem, I think being affected by other's problems wouldn't be much of a ....problem (hehe) if you know how to deal with it.
 
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I'm a psychology major, but counseling or therapy is not my main focus. There are many branches of psychology that an INFJ would be interested in, for me, it's neuropsychology. Yeah, I would not do well being a psychologist hearing other people's problems all day. I would most likely become emotionally invested in them and then I would later be the one in need of a shrink lol
 

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Oh yea yea. If you are a psychologist and you don't get affected by other problems, you shouldn't be one (thats just my opinion).
Really? I always thought it was the opposite. Psychologist should not be affected by other people's problems. There should be a degree of empathy from the psychologist to the patient, but I personally don't think it would be a good idea to let your patients problems get in the way of an objective analysis of how to help them get better.

Psychologists aren't your friends, they are professionals who are knowledgeable in the human mind and can give you insight as to how to get well.
 

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For me, it got to the point as you described and, overwhelmed by my own attempts to help people, I started using discretion to weed out those worth helping from those who would just falter again.

But I'm not the best example out there. ;)
 

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If you want to be a psychologist then be one. Either you or you don't, do your self a favor and do not bottle up your emotion's or feeling's. This is not good for anybody no matter what there MBTI type is.
There is many INFJ's that are Psychologist or Therapist but if you are already concerned about this question you asked maybe thats not a good idea for you. If you still want to be one when you get older then work on not taking stuff to personal or allowing others to affect you to much. Outlets work amazing by the way.


If people didn't want Therapist that didn't care then we would create robots for the job.....
 
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Therapy does not always involve big drama and problems that would make anyone cry. Sometimes people just need someone to help them see a bigger picture or clarify their inner visions, and for that I think infj's may have an advantage. The trick is to help people solve their problems, not you offering the solution - after all, it is their problem, and they must live with the solution, so it will be countereffective for the client to just make your evaluation and solution their own. This is probably why it sometimes takes a long time before change comes as a result of therapy.

There is a marked difference between working in the high security wing of a psychiatric ward, and working with children with learning disabilities. If you study psychology there is a wide range of work opportunities!

I don't think an infj teraphist will find it easy to deal with real psychopats, though...
 

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I LOVE PSYCHOLOGY SO MUCH!

It's my passion.


but to answer your question, It's good your thinking about the effects of being a phycologist. Once you get older you can find a balance with helping people and learning to express your own problems elsewhere. I say go after what you love because all other stuff in between (difficult or not) will not matter because you will be fulling your true desire in life and thats the whole point living.
 

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First of all, this is my first post so hello :proud:

Well, since I was younger (am 14 now) I've always been interested in psychology. From what I've read about the Myers-Briggs, INFJ make excellent psychologists. What I don't understand though, is that I've also read that we are greatly affected (and, of course, "way" to interested) by other's problems.

What I'm asking is: Even though we would help the person with a problem a lot, wouldn't an INFJ eventually bottle up ALL those problems and "explode"?


Keep in mind I'm new to the personality type thing...this is just from a few posts I've read online.

Thanks


PS: Pardon grammar.
Wow. I wish I knew about Myers-Briggs when I was 14. I thought I was crazy when I was your age.

Anyway, I'm going back to school to get my masters in psychology soon. Unfortunatley, I'm having trouble finding a job right now. This makes me spend too much time in the house- though I try to get out as much as circumstances allow. I definatley end up spending too much time on this forum. :crazy:

Good luck to you!
 

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First of all, this is my first post so hello :proud:

Well, since I was younger (am 14 now) I've always been interested in psychology. From what I've read about the Myers-Briggs, INFJ make excellent psychologists. What I don't understand though, is that I've also read that we are greatly affected (and, of course, "way" to interested) by other's problems.

What I'm asking is: Even though we would help the person with a problem a lot, wouldn't an INFJ eventually bottle up ALL those problems and "explode"?


Keep in mind I'm new to the personality type thing...this is just from a few posts I've read online.

Thanks


PS: Pardon grammar.
This reminds me of when I was a teenager. First of all, your grammar is very good. I even remember using bold, italics, etc quite often years back, but the older you get the more you just don't give a shit about those things. I wish I still did though. lol Anyway, my advice to you would be to keep this stuff in the back of your mind. Live your life and plan it out, but don't let your plans overrule your current life. Looking back, my first 18 years were my favorite because I had a set structure; I knew what was required of me. Now, I have to set my own life and achieve it.

Back to the topic at hand though (the older we get, the more tangents we explore it seems :tongue:), the best way to cope would be having someone around who you can vent to. Taking home job stress without finding a good source to let it out will burn you out. Quickly. Learning to take in and dish out will be a necessary skill. I find great solace in music, communication, and pot. You can wait 'til you're living in your own house for that last one. I didn't start until I turned 21. Anyway, I should probably just stop here before I am thrown in jail for encouraging a 14 year-old to use illegal substances. :unsure:
 

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Of course you have plenty of time to think about whether it's best for you or not. It was a serious consideration of mine for many years, but I am still greatly affected by people. I don't know if that is from a lack on my part- a refusal to mature in that regard, or from a refusal to go back to deadening myself so I don't feel the hurt around me, or even a lack of understanding how to go between the two depending on the circumstances. I *truly* do not know the answer to that.

I just know that for me as an individual, I would not be able to do the job as an actual Psychologist, therapist, counselor. When someone shares their pain with me, it's no different than my own. But, it's the same with all things. When someone shares their joy with me, it's no different than my own joy. I might as well have gotten the job, promotion, award as far as how I feel it. But I can play that role with a few individuals who wander into my life in whatever job I do.

I was originally frustrated when trying to decided what I wanted to be when I grew up (verdict is still out btw), that I seemed perfect as the role of counselor, but I couldn't imagine actually lasting in it without burnout. I love the whole subject of psychology, I devour everything I can learn about it. I people watch so I can understand better why people do what they do. But what's the point of it all if I can't do it as a profession? I look like a race car, I drive like a race car, I love everything about race cars, so why don't I want to go be in the race? (or a duck, or whatever imagery works for you :tongue: ).

But, I realized that the people that have helped me most in life, weren't counselors. They were incognito, in my everyday life. So, at the very least, maybe I'm suppose to use those skills in whatever it is I do or end up doing. I figure there is a reason for it. So if you find, as you get older, that you would like to play that role but you can't seem get past being so affected by others...it's ok. It doesn't mean that your can't, or won't, or haven't already helped others. Or if you find that you have no problem with that, & you're all on board to bring on the masses (or a few clients) then that's cool too. You'll know. :proud:
 
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Well I'm kind of the same...but what interests me is (I know it will sound "cheesy") how I could improve other's lives. And most of the time when I have a problem myself I don't need help solving/dealing with it...just need someone to hear it and I feel better.
By empathizing, providing sympathy - showing a person that there is somebody who understands him or her or at least is trying to understand and is concerned for his or her problems. Then coming up with solutions that person can try.

There are basically two ways to solve other people's problems - 1) prompt them to change their internal outlook, internal responses to the problem 2) prompt them to change something in their outside environment. So either you change yourself to adapt to your environment - or you adapt environment to yourself. Generally different personalities will struggle in different areas. INFJs for example are masters of changing internal outlook on things, but not strong at influencing their environment. On the other hand ENFPs are great at working with their outside environment but may experience problems changing their internal outlook on things. All personalities have certain blind-spots - things that they don't have a good grasp on but that a person who does evaluation from outside can point out to them.

If you would like to see how counselors function I would recommend you read a few books published by the people in practice. In these books there are usually descriptions of different cases that the psychologist had to deal with and how he or she handled them. You can also visit real psychologists to see how they work - some school and college campuses offer free counseling services. Then of course there are various support groups.
 

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So in short, everyday sports, music, walking and all that + a counselor for myself should prevent an INFJ counselor having problems?
I never said prevent, but they can help you cope and not lose your sense of balance in the process of internally solving your problems. My aunty is a psychologist who works in a hospital, so she deals with mental illness, criminals, intense conditions and said her mentors helped, having a degree of work-life balance helped but I suppose that is relative to how much emotional stability and perspective you already have.

The only reason I mentioned it is I know some people who are so focused on taking care of others' needs that they neglect their own without paying attention to how they can't effectively help people if they don't simultaneously make time for themselves to recharge and detach. A large part of it is ofc internal dialogue, training the mind to be more resilient in general. I don't know about you, but whenever you feel shit, how can make it go away? I've been in counselling myself, there is no magic cure. I just let the feelings naturally pass, I don't even try to distract myself and eventually they don't seem that scary or real anymore. Too much is considered dwelling for some, and their preference is to consciously take their mind off something they've done all they can to solve for the time being through not just hobbies but various mind-body relaxation techniques, which seem like mere escapist tendencies but aren't necessarily if you use them in tandem with continuously realigning mental and emotional perspectives with your ultimate goals. I was speaking in generalities bc I'm not sure there's a one size fits all formula to adopting such a super resilient perspective. You can call it Ti development if you want, it's all the same to me, finding outlets and perspectives to help you cope. I'm obviously not qualified to get anymore specific than this sorry. I truly hate giving advice, no sarcasm at all intended. hahah..
 

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Discussion Starter #20
I say go after what you love because all other stuff in between (difficult or not) will not matter because you will be fulling your true desire in life and thats the whole point living.
Yep, thats what makes me want to be a psychologist either way.


Wow. I wish I knew about Myers-Briggs when I was 14. I thought I was crazy when I was your age.
Haha I always did too....well that always isn't that long but y'know... I never thought I was crazy (as in different), I knew I was :)

Good luck to you too


This reminds me of when I was a teenager. First of all, your grammar is very good. I even remember using bold, italics, etc quite often years back, but the older you get the more you just don't give a shit about those things. I wish I still did though. lol Anyway, my advice to you would be to keep this stuff in the back of your mind. Live your life and plan it out, but don't let your plans overrule your current life. Looking back, my first 18 years were my favorite because I had a set structure; I knew what was required of me. Now, I have to set my own life and achieve it.

Learning to take in and dish out will be a necessary skill. I find great solace in music, communication, and pot. You can wait 'til you're living in your own house for that last one. I didn't start until I turned 21. Anyway, I should probably just stop here before I am thrown in jail for encouraging a 14 year-old to use illegal substances. :unsure:
Yea; since my English isn't the best I try very hard for it to be near perfect ...the bold/italic thing is just a habit I have and I don't want it :p.

Thanks for the "don't let your plans overrule your current life." , its kinda that phrase that wakes me up...

PS: I'm Puerto Rican, illegal drugs are inevitable for me..... gwad I'm JK



Again , Thanks for all the responses, very very helpful. (and sorry I can't respond to all of em, GTG sleep)
 
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