Personality Cafe banner

3081 - 3100 of 7804 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
5,991 Posts
In any case, I think it's the other person's social obligation to make any rejection gentle in effort to preserve relations (and delicate egos), because this is something natural, I think. So the fact that the miscommunication exists isn't actually all that bad, imo. Casualties will happen.
And I think that social obligation aspect is only attempted by a small amount of people. Not that it isn't a nice, but because it isn't easy for people who aren't so hot at finding the balance between gtfo of my face and gentle in the hopes of maintaining something. The INTP was pissed, the INFJ was gentle, and I'm sure ENFJs are even more so. I tend to just ignore women who I think like me and play dumb because I'd be terrible at telling them I wasn't interested.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
753 Posts
Curious though, even though we sit here and read things about these personality types and "well INTP men won't make the first move normally" and "ENFP girls are very forward", it makes me really think.

Men, whatever personality type, like to be chased. They like the ungettable girl and they want to "WIN" in the end. So, it makes me wonder, even if you are an INTP or whatever, and you won't generally make the first move, do you still like to try to chase? You still make the effort because you're men. And you don't want things just handed to you. And in a relationship, you will most likely want control of the situation and want to make the calls even though you're laid back about it. Am I right?

I'm outspoken because of my type. But, I like to be chased because, well I'm a woman.

The only thing MBTI shows us is patterns of how people may behave and what cognitive functions they have and how it affects decisions.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
93 Posts
Curious though, even though we sit here and read things about these personality types and "well INTP men won't make the first move normally" and "ENFP girls are very forward", it makes me really think.

Men, whatever personality type, like to be chased. They like the ungettable girl and they want to "WIN" in the end. So, it makes me wonder, even if you are an INTP or whatever, and you won't generally make the first move, do you still like to try to chase? You still make the effort because you're men. And you don't want things just handed to you. And in a relationship, you will most likely want control of the situation and want to make the calls even though you're laid back about it. Am I right?

I'm outspoken because of my type. But, I like to be chased because, well I'm a woman.

The only thing MBTI shows us is patterns of how people may behave and what cognitive functions they have and how it affects decisions.
I'm not in complete harmony with you here on "men like to be chased" I don't think this is a true observation/assumption. I like to make the first move and I'm an INTP. I will only make the first move if what I've digested in my mind is making sense to make sure I'm not going to make a fool of myself.


So you say ENFP girls are very forward? Interesting I must say.

I think I'd enjoy talking to a girl who is quite forward.

Sent from my GT-N7100 using Tapatalk
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
855 Posts
I'm not in complete harmony with you here on "men like to be chased" I don't think this is a true observation/assumption. I like to make the first move and I'm an INTP. I will only make the first move if what I've digested in my mind is making sense to make sure I'm not going to make a fool of myself.


So you say ENFP girls are very forward? Interesting I must say.

I think I'd enjoy talking to a girl who is quite forward.

Sent from my GT-N7100 using Tapatalk
I agree with you. I think that is a fair assessment of male INTPs. I'm an ENFP. And my male INTP says straight forward is one of my best qualities.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
5,991 Posts
Chasing is 90% of the fun, as long as there are subtle hints of interest- especially if they're really subtle because then you know they are in on the fun too. Unless you're completely off . . . which massively sucks.

I can only think of one or two girls who showed blatant interest first. One looked like she could take me in a fight, and the other had a bf.

Making decisions on small details isn't something I'm interested in and overall I like give and take.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
93 Posts
Chasing is 90% of the fun, as long as there are subtle hints of interest- especially if they're really subtle because then you know they are in on the fun too. Unless you're completely off . . . which massively sucks.

I can only think of one or two girls who showed blatant interest first. One looked like she could take me in a fight, and the other had a bf.

Making decisions on small details isn't something I'm interested in and overall I like give and take.

Explaining it like that makes it sound appealing to me. I think I'd enjoy chasing a girl In those circumstances.

Sent from my GT-N7100 using Tapatalk
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
916 Posts
Extrovert - Introvert paring seems best to me , at least on paper.
I think I'm kind of attracted to Extroverts but it could just be they are easier to get to know. I think Introverts are better for me. I become more extroverted when dating another introvert and when I need to withdrawal from people I get zero stress for doing it.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
4,165 Posts
I think I'm kind of attracted to Extroverts but it could just be they are easier to get to know. I think Introverts are better for me. I become more extroverted when dating another introvert and when I need to withdrawal from people I get zero stress for doing it.
I think this is what attracts me to introverts. Sometimes we Extros go 'too fast' and they can slow us down to a decent pace. In introverts I see beautiful souls ( I see that in all good people no matter what letter combo - eh weird for an ENTP to notice eh :p) so they are more grounded and trustworthy perhaps. In us I guess you see charisma and excitement but maybe a little mistrust or uncertainty ? Just kind of reflecting off my own conversations with Intros I've been with or interested in. I still don't get your logical connection on why you think Introverts are better for you. Care to elaborate more? Are you saying an extrovert doesn't allow you to be extroverted?
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
916 Posts
I think this is what attracts me to introverts. Sometimes we Extros go 'too fast' and they can slow us down to a decent pace. In introverts I see beautiful souls ( I see that in all good people no matter what letter combo - eh weird for an ENTP to notice eh :p) so they are more grounded and trustworthy perhaps.
Well, hey...I'm going to argue with that. ;)

In us I guess you see charisma and excitement but maybe a little mistrust or uncertainty ? Just kind of reflecting off my own conversations with Intros I've been with or interested in.
Yes...especially ENFs. ESTs and ESFs can't fool me as easily as ENFs.

I still don't get your logical connection on why you think Introverts are better for you. Care to elaborate more? Are you saying an extrovert doesn't allow you to be extroverted?
It's a combination of factors I think:
1. I don't have to be extroverted because they do all that work. I can be pretty outgoing so I'll often take up the extrovert torch if my partner is more introverted than me. My Ne really helps with this.
2. I see how important it is to them so take a step back so they can soak it in and I don't interfere or compete with them
3. I'm too busy trying to find time to be an introvert to focus on being an extrovert
4. I dated an INTJ for 7 years and it was the most relaxed I ever was in a relationship...I don't like drama and there was very little drama with an INTJ. What he lacked in passion he made up in other ways.
5. I reserve a lot of things for my spouse only so it's a little unsettling for me seeing an Extrovert display these things to other people.
6. It can be a fight to get an Extrovert to spend some nice quiet time home alone.
7.They don't understand my need to do tasks in solitary. I don't always like being drug everywhere because they can't do much alone.
8. Their idea of "friend" and my idea differs greatly. I've had extroverts who thought I have no friends when they don't realize that time apart between me and my closest friends is the norm. My best friend is another INTP female. We go months sometimes without talking but are very dear to each other. She is in a timezone ahead of me but for more than a decade calls me every New Year's Eve loaded to let me know an apocalypse never happened. It hurts a bit to be so misunderstood by people who are closest to you.
 
3081 - 3100 of 7804 Posts
Top