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#1 ·
what’s a possible different trait that would make you biased about being interested in an unattractive man

Does emotional intelligence, or intelligence or humor or passion or mystery etc.. compensate their physical appearance to you to the point you want to see where things might go, and what is the most favorable trait of all
 
#2 ·
what’s a possible different trait that would make you biased about being interested in an unattractive man

Does emotional intelligence, or intelligence or humor or passion or mystery etc.. compensate their physical appearance to you to the point you want to see where things might go, and what is the most favorable trait of all
Attraction goes way beyond physical attributes. What looks visually appealing to one person, may not be the same for the other. The only exception would be a typical 'shallow Hal' type which we all stay clear of.
Personally, sense of humor is huge and logical thinking with a twist of fun does it for me. Of course there must be a physical connection but that doesn't mean the guy must be drop dead gorgeous, in fact, I would prefer he wasn't.
I read your other post...I know you are trying to make sense of things. Hope this helps.
 
#4 ·
He swings his big dick around the room.That's the only way I'd consider him to be honest. I don't mean literally. Just a very sexually confident energy. Yeah, he's unattractive but he feels he can force me to change my mind. He does not care if I find him ugly or not, he thinks he can convince me otherwise, lul. "Fuck your opinion lady, I'm sexy anyway.." and his friends back him up in the social circle.

Too bad most unattractive dudes bring that weird nerd energy or that social energy that's like they haven't seen a human in weeks. So it rarely works.
 
#5 ·
He swings his big dick around the room.That's the only way I'd consider him to be honest. I don't mean literally. Just a very sexually confident energy. Yeah, he's unattractive but he feels he can force me to change my mind. He does not care if I find him ugly or not, he thinks he can convince me otherwise, lul. "Fuck your opinion lady, I'm sexy anyway.." and his friends back him up in the social circle.

Too bad most unattractive dudes bring that weird nerd energy or that social energy that's like they haven't seen a human in weeks. So it rarely works.

I noticed many of em settling with the nerdy loner who can’t connect with people and has girl problems which is an overplayed stereotype, it gets annoying to see someone clearly putting himself in that role knowing there are different approaches to gaining social status
 
#8 ·
I like guys that don't talk (much). I like the guy I have. I like guys who don't interrupt me when I'm arguing w/them. How rude of them, learn some fookin manners. I like guys that put the lotion in the basket, as told, and don't give me a lot of jibber -jabber. Or opinions.
 
#11 ·
Have enough humor that we can easily/naturally banter.
 
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#12 ·
Already liking them might be the first thing. If my spouse would get a disease that made him look hideous I would still love him.

Other than that... a lot of things really. Unless we are talking really hideously bad looking, I don't think it would be much of a problem for me, if other things were there. Pretty looks could be a treat, but not necessary. Once loving someone different aspects become dear anyways, that would perhaps not have registered as attractive before. (And for me often the traits of those I have been into before remain things I find attractive in others later, even if the general consensus might see it as a flaw).

Empathy and caring is very important to me, kindness. Intelligence not far below mine, but I think not far above either, it is about being in sync, able to understand each other and communicate somewhat easily. Imagination is also very attractive. Oh, and voices! sometimes overlooked, likely because you can't see them :) . An attractive voice can be of more importance than looks I think. Two of the people I had long time secret crushes on in my life, I felt attracted to the first time I heard them, when sitting with my back to them, so not seeing what they looked like until later. Had they been ugly... not sure, but I think the interest already sparked would have lasted. But they weren't, one was probably considered neutral and the other looked good.

I think more than looks, hygiene might be something to put me off when it comes to the physical. I imagine I would find it much easier to be with an ugly person than a very smelly and dirty person.
 
#19 ·
Already liking them might be the first thing. If my spouse would get a disease that made him look hideous I would still love him.

Other than that... a lot of things really. Unless we are talking really hideously bad looking, I don't think it would be much of a problem for me, if other things were there. Pretty looks could be a treat, but not necessary. Once loving someone different aspects become dear anyways, that would perhaps not have registered as attractive before. (And for me often the traits of those I have been into before remain things I find attractive in others later, even if the general consensus might see it as a flaw).

Empathy and caring is very important to me, kindness. Intelligence not far below mine, but I think not far above either, it is about being in sync, able to understand each other and communicate somewhat easily. Imagination is also very attractive. Oh, and voices! sometimes overlooked, likely because you can't see them :) . An attractive voice can be of more importance than looks I think. Two of the people I had long time secret crushes on in my life, I felt attracted to the first time I heard them, when sitting with my back to them, so not seeing what they looked like until later. Had they been ugly... not sure, but I think the interest already sparked would have lasted. But they weren't, one was probably considered neutral and the other looked good.

I think more than looks, hygiene might be something to put me off when it comes to the physical. I imagine I would find it much easier to be with an ugly person than a very smelly and dirty person.
This. Is. So. Beyond. Crushing.

To me, what calls in a game is flirts. If the other person insist with flirts after being blocked off repeatedly, like the person would know that being a player is ok if it is just own, that confidence will change the tune. Also, if one cant get rid of the other is interesting, as it sort of conveys the orbiter isnt in for just a laugh. Timing, too. And game quality in general, f.e. if frustrations are being displayed for the demand of delayed gratification, then the players dating options are limited and Im feeling like being his best ever, which kills the vibe as well. Also general richeness in all action and thought as well as dialog instead of either sided monologs or interregations or process based unorganic learned manipulation counts in too.

I do have to admit, that, penis circumference matters. Perhaps Im loose, or perhaps it just must feel different than a finger with a ring on it.

Bottom line, honesty and equipment.

Another story for longer term ideal.
 
#13 ·
Someone who is genuine will always be more attractive to me than someone who is not. The person I am with is probably the most genuine person I've ever met. He's direct with his needs, doesn't tiptoe around my feelings, and doesn't play games. I cannot stand not being able to tell if someone is being serious!
 
#14 ·
Most unattractive trait is insecurity. Guys with soft skills (people skills) are generally more attractive. Being physically attractive can help guys develop soft skills, but I've worked with a few guys in theatre who developed soft skills and not what I would think of as being very physically attractive. They're just the kind of people who make you feel good to be around! They're confident but don't try to be the center of attention. Usually they're funniest because they aren't trying to be funny, but zero in on when someone says something or does something funny. They aren't mocking them but act naturally.

I guess an example would be Gene Wilder. He's long before my time but noticed him when people said to watch his version of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. Not an attractive guy but he's just really good with people. He never upstages the people around him but gives them openings to shine. I'd say he's an example of an unattractive guy with excellent soft skills that overshadow his appearances. Someone you'd want to be around.
 
#15 ·
As many people have already mentioned, I am a slave to intelligence. A beautiful, vast, enigmatic mind captures me and I fall hopelessly enamored. There have been so many times that, despite feeling physically unattracted to a person, they slowly tug at my heart I witness how much knowledge they hold, their passion for learning, their intrigue in the world. There was a boy in my freshman year of high school, we were in chemistry class together. He absolutely spellbound me with his intelligence. Glimpsing his mind and the tantalizing knowledge he held was like peeking at the universe and feeling overwhelmed by the millions of stars. I was overwhelmed. Intelligence, an intriguing heart, or something beneath the surface that pulls me- a secret interest, knowledge, a distinct compassion, that is what captures me. Although maybe I am just picky and strange :(
 
#16 ·
what’s a possible different trait that would make you biased about being interested in an unattractive man

Does emotional intelligence, or intelligence or humor or passion or mystery etc.. compensate their physical appearance to you to the point you want to see where things might go, and what is the most favorable trait of all
I'm not gonna lie as shallow as I can be I base my relationships with people on how they make me feel around them and our conversations. Even if your the hottest guy in the world I wouldn't date you if you were boring. I'm sorry it the truth but if I can't watch my favorite cartoon or tv show with you and debate over which characters are the best or something like that it doesn't feel fun. If I don't have a genuinely great time with you and love spending time with you even doing nothing I'm probably not going to like you, whether your the most beautiful man or not I need to know I'm gonna have an adventure with you even if it's just watching tv.
 
#17 ·
I have poor vision to begin with, so looks really don't matter as much to me (except if a guy is really buff- that's just gross). I think it's his overall vibe. It's not one thing per se, it's who he is as a person as a whole, and how we mesh together. Ever been in a room with someone, and it feels as though time just freezes, and it feels like the two of you are the only two people are in the room? And everything else easily fades into the background? Ever met someone who you could walk anywhere, drive anywhere to, engage in the most mundane things, and felt like life was a party? It's that indescribeable feeling you can't describe, and bond is the closest word that comes to mind. It's that chemistry (emotional, intellectual, spiritual)/ vibrational energy about a person that 'clicks.' It's as if you two knew each other for lifetimes... your heart feels so light and full of life!

The whole package compensates for whatever supposed lack of ____ (fill in the blank) that person may have, according to conventional standards.
 
#20 ·
what’s a possible different trait that would make you biased about being interested in an unattractive man
What's the trait called for "brings me venison from the deer he killed and cleaned himself" and "is willing to fight a bear for me (and win)" ?

"unattractive" cavemen > "attractive" nerds/metrosexuals
 
#21 · (Edited)
Yes. Things like passion and humor can make someone who would otherwise be considered sub par in the attractiveness department by most people, very attractive to me. The face doesn't need to be conventionally attractive. I'm not into very overweight men, but you don't need to be ripped. A pretty boy with chiseled abs is nice to look at, but if he has no magnetic quality to him, then I'm not interested in a relationship. Any sense of a crush would die off as soon as I start to notice how dull he really is.

My family at one point was urging me to date this guy because he is handsome, has a job that impresses people, and is predicted to make a lot of money. This man had to be one of the emptiest people on the planet, could not hold a conversation at all, and had no interest in anything. It seemed like he wasn't a real person. Also, being provided for by someone financially doesn't appeal to me at all because I can take care of myself. I'd rather not financially tie myself up with a man at all, the connection is what matters. We can spoil each other once in a while, but I focus on fairness. So, looks don't do most of the work. For some it can though.

I would try to have someone on the same level as me in nearly all aspects because I don't want to be the type of person with unrealistic standards. I'd look for someone around the same level of intelligence, and I think that it would be ideal for us to think in ways that are similar yet different enough to keep conversations interesting and to encourage growth. The willingness to resolve conflict is also up on my list, can't stand passive-aggressive or snide people. They do nothing for the relationship. I could list other a few other things, but I think curiosity is my favorite trait.
 
#22 ·
Nothing compensates the lack of physical attraction.
Someone can be ugly but sexually attractive to me; some other one classically beautiful and not sexually attractive.

Anyway if I don't find him attractive I don't and won't. That's all.
 
#23 ·
what’s a possible different trait that would make you biased about being interested in an unattractive man

Does emotional intelligence, or intelligence or humor or passion or mystery etc.. compensate their physical appearance to you to the point you want to see where things might go, and what is the most favorable trait of all
Yes, A combo of all of them. Emotional intelligence/intelligence would cover humor/mystery. Without those two their humor would not match up with mine and I would think they are stupid. Passion as in for something or sexual?

My dad gifted me a shirt for Christmas one time that had a cartoon zombie chick on it that said ~ I like my men with brains and a key chain one time that said~ I refuse to have a battle of wits with an unarmed person. So, I guess that answers that lol

If someone is hot with low intelligence, I will be way less attracted. While I could appreciate looking at them, that is as far as it would go.
 
#24 ·
what’s a possible different trait that would make you biased about being interested in an unattractive man

Does emotional intelligence, or intelligence or humor or passion or mystery etc.. compensate their physical appearance to you to the point you want to see where things might go, and what is the most favorable trait of all
I'd say if I found a man physically unattractive he wouldn't have that much of a chance with me, but you might be surprised in what I find attractive. like a previous poster said she didnt find the actor Gene Wilder attractive. I remember thinking once I thought him strikingly good looking. (Not a fan of his hair in Willie Wonka though.) But definitely unattractive features can be tolerated if they are made up with things like wit or attitude. Like if you think they are cool or if they act like a hot shit or something and you dig the vibe they give off. So even if you don't think you are handsome, there are probbaly people who would find you that way. Maybe you remind them of their father or someone they admire.. You never know. They might have to pursue a little harder or be more persisitent in trying to win a girl over, but I'd say there's definitely hope. It just may take longer for her to warm up to you. So, I guess basically it's good or agreeable to you personality. Emotional intelligence, humor, passion, or mystery would not be any that I would consider any single traits that would suffice though. Remember people are a total package. Humor is definitely a good trait, but not enough to me to overcome unattractive-to-me looks, but if humor was part of their overall great attitude then perhaps it would make a difference.
 
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