Questions About Connecting and Interacting With ENTJs

I think the correct answer to all your questions is "Don't be an idiot".

Scelerat said:

I think the correct answer to all your questions is "Don't be an idiot".

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:laughing:

/end thread.

Scelerat said:

I think the correct answer to all your questions is "Don't be an idiot".

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LOL DEAD! :laughing:

Scelerat's response was the same as mine, albeit more streamlined, in the ESTJ subforum. I never really understand these people that post in every subforum with questions like these. Oh well, intellectuals will be intellectuals.

Scelerat said:

I think the correct answer to all your questions is "Don't be an idiot".

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I tried to think of a more specific response, but I think this is about it.

Close this up. All's been said now.

I always wonder how these questions can have any meaning if they don't have immediate applicability. Otherwise, this info is readily searched in the interwebs.

Comment: Seems like our INTJ brethren are more likely to answer and enjoy questionnaires compared to us. Now that's interesting.

;-;

Scelerat said:

I think the correct answer to all your questions is "Don't be an idiot".

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Surely there's more to it than "don't be an idiot"? But then again, how do you define idiocy? And is this definition held by ENTJs in general, or is it more specific to your own personal perceptions? Not being an idiot might lead to a detached sense of respect for another person, and even towards the building of casual friendships; but does it lead to attachment as well? Do you grow very fond of every person you meet who happens to not be an idiot? And I'm genuinely interested in understanding here.

Surely there's more to it than "don't be an idiot"? But then again, how do you define idiocy? And is this definition held by ENTJs in general, or is it more specific to your own personal perceptions? Not being an idiot might lead to a detached sense of respect for another person, and even towards the building of casual friendships; but does it lead to attachment as well? Do you grow very fond of every person you meet who happens to not be an idiot? And I'm genuinely interested in understanding here.

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You're overthinking it. It's really simple. ENTJ's live by that one rule. Don't be an idiot. ENTJ's love competence. If you are good at your job, or you are talented at what you do, I think it's stupid not to give you kudos. If you suck at your job, I have the right to tell you you do. We also love efficiency. Don't waste.

Pendit76 said:

You're overthinking it. It's really simple. ENTJ's live by that one rule. Don't be an idiot. ENTJ's love competence. If you are good at your job, or you are talented at what you do, I think it's stupid not to give you kudos. If you suck at your job, I have the right to tell you you do. We also love efficiency. Don't waste.

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Again, I can see how someone being competent would cause you to respect them. I too easily respect people I feel are competent, and I'm very attracted to these same individuals as well. But my question is, does competence itself cause ENTJs to let people into their personal space? Would it lower the ENTJ's wall so that the other person has an opportunity to explore their more authentic side? Is that all it takes?

KINGoftheAMAZONS said:

Surely there's more to it than "don't be an idiot"? But then again, how do you define idiocy? And is this definition held by ENTJs in general, or is it more specific to your own personal perceptions? Not being an idiot might lead to a detached sense of respect for another person, and even towards the building of casual friendships; but does it lead to attachment as well? Do you grow very fond of every person you meet who happens to not be an idiot? And I'm genuinely interested in understanding here.

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Just speaking for myself here:

I'm pretty patient if someone genuinely doesn't understand something. I would never hold someone's ignorance on a topic against them. There's plenty of stuff I don't know, either - there is no shame in not knowing something, but I have a low threshold for bullshit and little patience for fucknuttery --> willful ingorance.

The second part of your question - does it lead to attachments? I treat people as individuals, and I've learned how to get along with people I don't have much in common with, but in general, I prefer to be in the company of people who can carry on an interesting conversation that sparks my interest.

For me, there are different levels of friendship. There are some friends that I can meet with for lunch every once in a while and chat amiably about casual subjects (an occasional lunch hour is more than enough), and others whom I find engaging and love to sit around and talk with about topics that are a bit more abstract and that interest me.

Again, I can see how someone being competent would cause you to respect them. I too easily respect people I feel are competent, and I'm very attracted to these same individuals as well. But my question is, does competence itself cause ENTJs to let people into their personal space? Would it lower the ENTJ's wall so that the other person has an opportunity to explore their more authentic side? Is that all it takes?

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Competence isn't the only thing required to be let into an ENTJ's personal space. I'd say it varies a lot from person to person depending on their morals. I don't want to make a hasty generalizations.

Got any examples from other types?

MsBossyPants said:

For me, there are different levels of friendship. There are some friends that I can meet with for lunch every once in a while and chat amiably about casual subjects (an occasional lunch hour is more than enough), and others whom I find engaging and love to sit around and talk with about topics that are a bit more abstract and that interest me.

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Yes, I think I understand a bit better now. Let me ask you this. When it comes to this latter group of people that you like to discuss abstract topics with, are they also divided into separate categories? Perhaps some of them are more closer to you on an emotional level than others? If so, then what specific qualities do these people closest to you possess?

From the various things I've seen Te-doms write on this website, it doesn't appear that you lot are the "wear your heart on your sleeve" type. So are there any other characteristics besides intelligence that would make you decide that it was safe enough to give someone a peek into your hopes, your fears, your insecurities, your aspirations... you know, those things that, when exposed, might make you feel more vulnerable?

KINGoftheAMAZONS said:

Yes, I think I understand a bit better now. Let me ask you this. When it comes to this latter group of people that you like to discuss abstract topics with, are they also divided into separate categories? Perhaps some of them are more closer to you on an emotional level than others? If so, then what specific qualities do these people closest to you possess?

From the various things I've seen Te-doms write on this website, it doesn't appear that you lot are the "wear your heart on your sleeve" type. So are there any other characteristics besides intelligence that would make you decide that it was safe enough to give someone a peek into your hopes, your fears, your insecurities, your aspirations... you know, those things that, when exposed, might make you feel more vulnerable?

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:dry: Excellent observation.

MsBossyPants said:

:dry: Excellent observation.

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Is my observation inaccurate? Obvious? Offensive? It's been a long day and I can't tell whether you're being sarcastic, or not. Though my intentions were not to offend anyone. I just wanted to know if it took more than mere competence and good conversation to build a genuinely closer relationship with an ENTJ?

@KINGoftheAMAZONS, some people are more private than others, buddy.

You cannot have a formula for making friends, everyone is fucking different. Even ENTJs are different from other ENTJs, focus less on the type (don't focus on the type) and focus on them.

KINGoftheAMAZONS said:

Surely there's more to it than "don't be an idiot"? But then again, how do you define idiocy? And is this definition held by ENTJs in general, or is it more specific to your own personal perceptions? Not being an idiot might lead to a detached sense of respect for another person, and even towards the building of casual friendships; but does it lead to attachment as well? Do you grow very fond of every person you meet who happens to not be an idiot? And I'm genuinely interested in understanding here.

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I don't grow fond on anyone I first meet. I test them for idiocy. if they pass, (after several years) they have a lifelong friend and resource. they don't pass, no more contact.

Idiot: things that go against my moral compass, that are viewed by society to be heinous, hurting the downtrodden or weak, whining about shit but never fixing it (shut up already), big dreams but no skills, saying things you think I'll like instead of finding out what I really like. there's more I'm sure.

Lazy Bear said:

@KINGoftheAMAZONS, some people are more private than others, buddy.

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Agreed. And I respect anyone's right not to answer me. I just didn't know if I was being unintentionally offensive, or not. And while in most situations on perc, I could care less if I'm offending others, this subject matter is a bit more personal, and so I'm a bit more aware of trying not to be rude. So thanks for the heads up. If anyone would like to give their opinion on the questions I've asked, I'd welcome it.

You cannot have a formula for making friends, everyone is fucking different. Even ENTJs are different from other ENTJs, focus less on the type (don't focus on the type) and focus on them.

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Thanks. I'll keep this in mind.