Personality Cafe banner
Status
Not open for further replies.
1 - 7 of 7 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
257 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Not exactly sure how to open this thread, in the context of what to write for the introduction, but here goes anyways:

As much as it would be nice if everyone were accepting of peoples' differences in relationships and love and didn't bother them regarding their preferences, it's not always that simple. Plenty of people are still persecuted for reasons such as a large age gap, being homosexual or bisexual, or for interracial or interfaith dating.

I don't have a particular question, but thought it would be nice to have an open discussion thread for people having dealt with these issues or their thoughts, fears, and hopes, regarding this subject.

Although here are some questions anyways:
1. Have you ever been subjected to any of this unfair treatment?
2. If so, were you able to get through to your family/friends/target group with the issue? Did they grow to accept it?
OR simply... What are your thoughts and/or feelings on this issue.

I'll start:

I feel I've been pretty lucky in regards to this issue. I never had any of these issues with my first two boyfriends, however, any shred of this that I dealt with started with my current boyfriend. My past boyfriends were both Christian, one was Filipino and the second one was Italian/Puerto-Rican. As I said, not an issue. My parents liked them, and they were extremely close to my age so there was no issue from anyone (except for one of my ex's emotional issues later, but that is besides the fact). After said emotional issues caused a break-up, I met my third, and current boyfriend, whom I am very serious about. I fell hard and fast for him, but tried to keep things in perspective. During a chat with him, he revealed himself to be Agnostic, and having been raised in a Christian family, it took me a little time to sit and think things through (although not that long, because I felt pretty strongly for him). My parents, being very open-minded, feel that he is a great guy, and although they aren't pleased (but they're not "mad", persay) that he isn't Christian, they understand I am old enough to make those sorts of choices. However, here is where my problem came in:

My boyfriend is black, and my Grandmother is a Southern-raised, devout Christian (although she does an awful lot of condemning...). Ever since my Grandfather passed away a few years ago, she has become a lot more open regarding those whom she condemns, and sometimes it seems as if she doesn't realize exactly what she's saying. When she and her husband came over to visit during the first Christmas my S.O. and I were dating, I was scared to death that she would inadvertently say something racist towards him (more in an "ignorant" sense, if that makes sense. Having been raised to say/think something but not realize the depth of it) or would bring up the question of his spirituality. Extremely thankfully for me, she didn't bring it up and the meeting of the two turned out to be a lot more normal than I expected it would. However, I have had to keep my mouth shut about the subject to my Grandmother, and I fear that if the time come that I move in with him, if she were to find out, that she'd cut me off emotionally or something, and the thought kind of bothers me.

I know I probably don't have it nearly as bad as other people, but it makes me curious to see how other people have dealt with this issue, or how they feel about it.
 
  • Like
Reactions: SaraBell

·
Registered
Joined
·
5,730 Posts
#1: A bit, but most people didn't care.
#2: Most people didn't care, and I simply let the relationship bloom to prove them wrong.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,064 Posts
The fact that I'm an atheist has kept me from having a serious relationship. I've had a couple relationships but once it started getting even semi serious they find out I'm an atheist and either their parents shut it down or they do. Ironic the parents would do that because me, as an atheist am so cold and unforgiving and heartless.....do you see the irony?
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
685 Posts
The fact that I'm an atheist has kept me from having a serious relationship. I've had a couple relationships but once it started getting even semi serious they find out I'm an atheist and either their parents shut it down or they do. Ironic the parents would do that because me, as an atheist am so cold and unforgiving and heartless.....do you see the irony?
You're joking, right? Where d'you live?
Here in France you have a better chance of having a serious relationship if you're an atheist than if you're not. Well no, I'm exaggerating a wee bit. But most people here are atheist or agnostic (I'm not, but almost all my friends are) so obviously it doesn't pose any problem whatsoever.

I'm shocked that you've had that problem just because you're a freethinker. I really am.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,544 Posts
Oh, jeez. Considering I like to date psychotic weirdos and dance on the other side of normality, yes, I've experienced this.

My first boyfriend was six years older than me, and when you're only sixteen hat's no good. Obviously, my parents weren't happy, but we did it anyway. Lasted for about a year.

My current boyfriend is a very white, Aryan-looking dude who is atheist ( I'm agnostic, parents hate it, but they'll get over it ) whereas I'm black. A black male with a white female is perfectly okay around here, but for some reason, it's crazy for a white male and a black female to get together.

I was going to continue typing, but I completely lost my train of thought.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
314 Posts
:laughing:Funny story: When I was in beauty school a couple years back, I was doing one of my regular client's hair. She was very old (in her 80s). She asked me if I had a boyfriend or a husband. I told her that yes, I do have a boyfriend. Then she asked "what is his name?"...Well I wasn't going to lie of course, so I told her "His name is Pedro". There was a long pause and then she turns to me, takes my hand, and says "Well, that's ok!".
 
1 - 7 of 7 Posts
This is an older thread, you may not receive a response, and could be reviving an old thread. Please consider creating a new thread.
Status
Not open for further replies.
Top