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♂️ Xennial - Melancholic/Choleric
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Discussion Starter #1 (Edited)
In the IDR gender roles quiz, I score somewhere between the "feminine" and "undifferentiated" territories. Likewise I feel I get along better with female friends and relatives. I don't really like competing or facing danger.

But I also feel there is repressed masculinity within me. How can I embrace it? I don't mean embracing a macho stereotype, but getting in touch with my manhood and male sexual energy.

A therapist said, read Iron John but it's almost useless piece of garbage. The only thing I liked there is the idea of red knight (driven by anger), white knight (idealistic) and black knight (who fights only in self-defence like Miyagi). I'm a white knight, which means immature according to Robert Bly, but I don't care about maturity ;P
 

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Well, I see gender identity as the reappropriation of our body, and sometimes this process can activate some form of gender dysphoria. Some event, like body humiliation through sexual harrassment, isolation, fat-shaming, rape and abuse, systematic gender expectation being thrown at you. Those would be your priority zo fix as it would be very bad to enter trans territory from the get go when you had to endure those kind of things. Enby (non-binary territory) cannot be damaging, it's actually a gender identity which allow you to experiment everything. This process could require time if a lot has been destroyed by prior social experiences. If gender dysphoria stay for too long, it means that something is lacking in the reappriopriation of your body, either something feel off about your body directly, or about how you behave with your body or how you dress it.

The latter is the easier to change, then how you behave, but still require some learning, the last is the thing you want to be careful and/or will require a lot of time. Sometimes building some muscles, wether you're assigned male or female at birth, can alleviate this emotion of being kinda off with what's called gender and/or gendered expectations, or wearing cloth which embrass your form in a manner you find beautiful, or temporarly hide your form while you're working on it. Sometimes, to look at your childhood, trying to connect yourself with what you did desired before, can be helpful, wether it's to reject them or accept them again as your own.

Your judgement of who you're, when you enter "artificial" or authentic territory, is a key component. It's usually pretty hard, at start, to know what's feel close to a warm and cozy home, to close to being off the mark (what you're trying to alleviate, where you were before), or too far from home.

Because you want to turn yourself toward masculinity, you should define what would be an ideal masculinity. We have all gender expectations, but the lines are blurry and something that is usually expected from feminine people can be reappropriate to compose a masculinity, and you can play however you want, maybe just don't act like you have periods or something which is mostly experienced by afab people, but I think you didn't need to hear that haha ^^.

Now honestly you took a hard quest, cause when a man want to manifest how good they're in their masculinity, it often goes toward machismo and sexism, and people who want to be seen as men, but do not follow this path, seem a bit lost, cause it looks like an inexplored territory, or it's seen as "gay". If, on a whim, I wanted to achieve some masculinity, I don't really know the content I would give it, but what I wouldn't give is this distance with our emotions. If to connect yourself with your masculinity has this as a goal, this is bad, eveything but this, this can't end well. Your emotions is the most important thing when you want to reappropriate your body, when you feel good, that's the right direction, when you feel bad, try to look exactly what makes you feel bad, and so on, and so on. That's your guide to progress in any gender identity, wherever you end, this will be your guide and none can help you there. You're never alone if you have emotions, people around you can shed some light on them, but you're the one feeling them in the end.

I don't have better advices.



Cheers from a trans person.
 

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Discussion Starter #3 (Edited)
Some event, like body humiliation through sexual harrassment, isolation, fat-shaming, rape and abuse, systematic gender expectation being thrown at you. Those would be your priority zo fix as it would be very bad to enter trans territory from the get go when you had to endure those kind of things.
Stop assuming these things, I was never raped or harassed. Isolation yes, and I was "shamed" by other boys for not being fit enough. I had eczema and could not participate in sports, and at 8-12 it's probably the most important thing that builds a boy's self-esteem and his sense of being male.

Because you want to turn yourself toward masculinity, you should define what would be an ideal masculinity. We have all gender expectations, but the lines are blurry and something that is usually expected from feminine people can be reappropriate to compose a masculinity, and you can play however you want, maybe just don't act like you have periods or something which is mostly experienced by afab people, but I think you didn't need to hear that haha ^^.

Now honestly you took a hard quest, cause when a man want to manifest how good they're in their masculinity, it often goes toward machismo and sexism, and people who want to be seen as men, but do not follow this path, seem a bit lost, cause it looks like an inexplored territory, or it's seen as "gay". If, on a whim, I wanted to achieve some masculinity, I don't really know the content I would give it, but what I wouldn't give is this distance with our emotions. If to connect yourself with your masculinity has this as a goal, this is bad, eveything but this, this can't end well. Your emotions is the most important thing when you want to reappropriate your body, when you feel good, that's the right direction, when you feel bad, try to look exactly what makes you feel bad, and so on, and so on. That's your guide to progress in any gender identity, wherever you end, this will be your guide and none can help you there. You're never alone if you have emotions, people around you can shed some light on them, but you're the one feeling them in the end.
I fancied that I experience gender dysphoria in my early 20s (2007-9) but really I never wanted to be a girl I only didn't want to be like my robotic dad or animalistic chavs. Bad role models made me disconnect from my real self. When I overcame it I turned towards sexism and idealization of machismo before achieving a reasonable balance around 2013. Later, after liaison with a dangerous woman in 2017 the dysphoria started to revive, as I started associating being male with being vulnerable to manipulative seduction and slavery to the libido. Now I reject all those extremes, I just want to reconnect with primal masculine energy of my body.
 

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Stop assuming these things, I was never raped or harassed. Isolation yes, and I was "shamed" by other boys for not being fit enough. I had eczema and could not participate in sports, and at 8-12 it's probably the most important thing that builds a boy's self-esteem and his sense of being male.
Oh sorry, I'm so sorry, my bad, I didn't want to assume anything you went through :crying:, I formulated it so badly. I didn't went through a lot either, but I went still straight into a depression and a self-hate circle.

I fancied that I experience gender dysphoria in my early 20s (2007-9) but really I never wanted to be a girl I only didn't want to be like my robotic dad or animalistic chavs. Bad role models made me disconnect from my real self. When I overcame it I turned towards sexism and idealization of machismo before achieving a reasonable balance around 2013. Later, after liaison with a dangerous woman in 2017 the dysphoria started to revive, as I started associating being male with being vulnerable to manipulative seduction and slavery to the libido. Now I reject all those extremes, I just want to reconnect with primal masculine energy of my body.
Yeah, that's it you need to reconnect with yourself, but I fear that no model will really help you in the long term. I may be wrong, but I never had models, still I found myself.

How would you describe this "primal masculine energy" of your body? I may not believe in that, but if you can describe it as much as you can, it can definitely help you to express it.
 

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Perhaps you should try weight lifting, it will likely both improve your mood and body-image. You could try calisthenics if you don't wanna go to a gym. Perhaps it's less as a need to connect with your manhood and more a need to become healthier, fitter, and more confident in having control & mastery of yourself (body-mind). For some reason people interpret this as a masculine/feminine thing, but both genders go through similar transformations so I think the principle is the above I mentioned.

Anchoring the sense of man/womanhood to our 12 year old self, an age when everything is very confusing and we make tons of errors of judgment, is not the best idea. I've spent the better part of my 20s unraveling and re-configuring those things and believe most people are capable of that. Go against it and create the change you want, as hard as it seems. It only becomes like this because we make that decision on some level and consider it set in stone when it's not.
 

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Find a way to view those bad role models in a more positive light. Every trait has it's positive and negative aspects. Sometimes it's difficult to find a positive side, but there is usually something, somewhere, under some circumstances. Attempt to empathise and understand their motivations. You don't have to find out exactly why they behaved a certain way, you only need to find a good enough reason in in your own mind. It's not about excusing their behaviour if it was extreme, but finding a way to understand it from their pov.
Look at traits in people which trigger an emotional response in you, whether it be repulsion or admiration. Those emotions are your indicators, the stronger they are, the harder you need to try.
That will help you connect to parts of yourself which you're trying to repress and assign them the value which they're entitled to.
 

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Discussion Starter #7 (Edited)
How would you describe this "primal masculine energy" of your body? I may not believe in that, but if you can describe it as much as you can, it can definitely help you to express it.
Feeling strong and energized, and enjoying my libido without feeling enslaved by it. I've noticed that when I don't masturbate this primal energy becomes more available, as if masturbation squandered it.

@Red Panda
Some things admired by 12-year-olds, like sport and adventure, are good for people at any age. I'll probably try calisthenics since I don't like the idea of growing big bulky biceps.
@Kynx
So I should try at my dad and the chavs as "guys who wanted to be admirable but failed"? I can appreciate some things they did, e.g. my dad was an awesome swimmer and one of the chavs was always great on the pitch, now he is a football trainer.
 

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In the IDR gender roles quiz, I score somewhere between the "feminine" and "undifferentiated" territories. Likewise I feel I get along better with female friends and relatives. I don't really like competing or facing danger.

But I also feel there is repressed masculinity within me. How can I embrace it? I don't mean embracing a macho stereotype, but getting in touch with my manhood and male sexual energy.

A therapist said, read Iron John but it's almost useless piece of garbage. The only thing I liked there is the idea of red knight (driven by anger), white knight (idealistic) and black knight (who fights only in self-defence like Miyagi). I'm a white knight, which means immature according to Robert Bly, but I don't care about maturity ;P
You might try reading some Joseph Campbell? I think he explored masculinity a little bit.

The Hero's Journey by Joseph Campbell:

 

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Feeling strong and energized, and enjoying my libido without feeling enslaved by it. I've noticed that when I don't masturbate this primal energy becomes more available, as if masturbation squandered it.
Hum, I don't see that as particularly masculine, neither feminine, just human. I'm not doing much of my days, and I don't feel as strong and as energized as when I was working. But I love that feeling and it happened when I was one with myself and the environnement I was working in. So you have to really connect yourself with a desired projection of yourself, for the moment, love yourself as man, so you can love other afterwards.

Also, I have tamed my libido, while still being under my "natural" androgenes (testosterone), it was triggering dysphoria, so had to figure out something. The libido is definitely different if you're under oestrogens, but that isn't my case for now, so consider we kinda have the same sort of libido. Maybe, if you tend to do that often and fast, just to release your libido, try the next time more preliminaries, even just when you want to masturbate yourself, take your time, do that in the most soothing way possible. It fits more the libido of women tend to get, from what I heard of my trans sisters, but everyone is different, so women who a libido more like men exist, and maybe you just need that, try a different cycle. I really feel in control of my body now, it's almost like I could be man, but meh... I'm not one. :)

I'm sorry to bring my trans stuff in there, but the goals we have, awkwardly fit. Don't see that in any way as trying to think you're more feminine, you're who you're, but I don't see why you should require a barrier between the gender and their expectations. You're a man, you project yourself as man, do with that, it's only speech, the important is that how you behave pleases you... and that you don't oppress people while achieving this, you know how men can act badly towars women and men alike.
 

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Thats more down to the correct modern society. Where the ideal male model is being controling, hypocritical douchebag. I mean the amount of Jocks, bullies and toxic, overly controling Fathers are so common nowadays and many males use this as the main role model, it is also down to eugenics such as genepool elitism, so ofcourse there is large precentage of males who dont feel comfortable in their skin and felt like losers for most of their life by said toxic male enviroments.
 
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Once you toss out gender roles from your psyche, life will make more sense to you since you'll spend less time trying to 'fit' and more time towards, improving what you wish, and what you enjoy the most out of life.
 

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In the IDR gender roles quiz, I score somewhere between the "feminine" and "undifferentiated" territories. Likewise I feel I get along better with female friends and relatives. I don't really like competing or facing danger.

But I also feel there is repressed masculinity within me. How can I embrace it? I don't mean embracing a macho stereotype, but getting in touch with my manhood and male sexual energy.

A therapist said, read Iron John but it's almost useless piece of garbage. The only thing I liked there is the idea of red knight (driven by anger), white knight (idealistic) and black knight (who fights only in self-defence like Miyagi). I'm a white knight, which means immature according to Robert Bly, but I don't care about maturity ;P
Sports? That oughta do the trick. Usually people associate masculinity with adrenaline rushes, competition and physical exertion.
Stuff like laser tag, escape rooms or airsoft/paintballing would probs be a good outlet too.
Also FPS or RTS videogames, but a sport provides more benefits.
 

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In the IDR gender roles quiz, I score somewhere between the "feminine" and "undifferentiated" territories. Likewise I feel I get along better with female friends and relatives. I don't really like competing or facing danger.
Yeah I can completely relate. That same test also gives me average masculine and very low feminine scores. It’s also bothersome that people love calling me “male brained” or “manly” as if I’m not a proper woman and some freak, despite always wearing female clothes (but no make-up). I’m mostly into commonly male interests (cars, hunting, violent media etc). Was also a tomboy as a kid.

I believe that the real culprit here is our Big 5 scores here. I score low in agreeableness and extroversion which is more common for men while you seem to have high agreeableness, commonly found in women.

I’ve read some article online that said how much testesterone you’ve received in utero affects your finger length and brain structure; that females have longer index fingers while males have longer ring fingers. Well it mostly seems to be accurate except for the fact that my ring finger is much longer than my index. I’m curious about yours.

Also what’s your sexual orientation? I’m %80 more attracted to women than I am to men, never romantically pursued women though.

I’m asking these because I’m curious whether all that stuff is related and my brain got fucked up in utero.
 

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I’m asking these because I’m curious whether all that stuff is related and my brain got fucked up in utero.
Why would you care? The causes, if they're causes, can't change, we have to deal with what we get. There's probably something different about LBGT+ people, but it's a "curse" and something "bad" only because of society, that's the cause of our problems. The society fucked up, my brain didn't, it is fine.

Yeah I can completely relate. That same test also gives me average masculine and very low feminine scores. It’s also bothersome that people love calling me “male brained” or “manly” as if I’m not a proper woman and some freak, despite always wearing female clothes (but no make-up). I’m mostly into commonly male interests (cars, hunting, violent media etc). Was also a tomboy as a kid.

I believe that the real culprit here is our Big 5 scores here. I score low in agreeableness and extroversion which is more common for men while you seem to have high agreeableness, commonly found in women.
What's funny about those tests, is that we test differently depending of the event we get through. I would have scored more with masculine associated traits some years before, and now I score more in feminine associated traits. And gender complementarity is bullshit, I had to say it ^^.

Everything changes our brain structure, everytime, there're no "male brain" and "female brain". Our brain is influenced by social interactions, depending of what you've been taught, your brain will change. So all those things with gender and sex, are just social expectations which we either reject or assimilate. Find your path.

What you heard about testosterone is right, but it doesn't affect, or very very very very slightly, our gender identity, and our romantic and/or sexual attractions.

I have ring finger longer, probably XY chromosomes, my physiology is functional like expected, but I'm definitely a more reliable and a happy person now than when I was seen as a man, or worse, a male... ugh. To be reduced to my biology is the worse.
 

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Why would you care? The causes, if they're causes, can't change, we have to deal with what we get. There's probably something different about LBGT+ people, but it's a "curse" and something "bad" only because of society, that's the cause of our problems. The society fucked up, my brain didn't, it is fine.



What's funny about those tests, is that we test differently depending of the event we get through. I would have scored more with masculine associated traits some years before, and now I score more in feminine associated traits. And gender complementarity is bullshit, I had to say it ^^.

Everything changes our brain structure, everytime, there're no "male brain" and "female brain". Our brain is influenced by social interactions, depending of what you've been taught, your brain will change. So all those things with gender and sex, are just social expectations which we either reject or assimilate. Find your path.

What you heard about testosterone is right, but it doesn't affect, or very very very very slightly, our gender identity, and our romantic and/or sexual attractions.

I have ring finger longer, probably XY chromosomes, my physiology is functional like expected, but I'm definitely a more reliable and a happy person now than when I was seen as a man, or worse, a male... ugh. To be reduced to my biology is the worse.
And why did you get so agressive and touchy when I wasn’t even talking about you or your brain. But even so you yourself said that you had gender dysmorphia, a mental disorder; your solution was transitioning so please don’t pretend like it’s some issue I’ve just made up. Society is the way it is because I’m outside the norms (how majority are). I care because it affects my social life so I’d like to find out the reason.
 

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And why did you get so agressive and touchy when I wasn’t even talking about you or your brain. But even so you yourself said that you had gender dysmorphia, a mental disorder; your solution was transitioning so please don’t pretend like it’s some issue I’ve just made up. Society is the way it is because I’m outside the norms (how majority are). I care because it affects my social life so I’d like to find out the reason.
Ew, what? Sorry, I didn't wanted to sound aggressive, why everyone think I'm being aggressive? I didn't felt threatened by anything you said, I found your comment interesting with a lot of things I could relate to, that's why I responded to you. I would also like to know why I'm like that, but we haven't an answer yet and that wouldn't change our conditions, and when I speak of conditions, I speak of all those behaviour we have regarding romance, love and sex.

It affects my social life too, I have never been told before to go in a psychiatric hospital or to kill myself and to pray to be born again a woman. I was merely willing to point that the problem is who decide what is the norm, you're normal, I'm normal, everyone is normal. The problem are the people who are pissing us off, because they embody the "norm" and we don't.

If you're looking at the biological reasons why people are homosexual, the answer will be biological. What do we do when we have biological answers while having an homophobic society? Eugenics. I don't want that, neither do you. I can't imagine that what you're going through pushed you to think that we should control birth, so no homosexuals are born, and thus don't suffer. That's why I asked you: "Why do you care?" It's because nothing will be better if you look into biology, there're no medication for that, cause it's not a sickness.

I'm really sorry you took that badly my intervention. I just wanted to point out that your struggles won't be solved there, or maybe they will. Do you think you'll live better if you know the why of your condition? How do you think you'll do that? I'm genuinly interested, cause I found nothing there. We can help eachother, or so I think.





And it's gender dysphoria, and it isn't a mental disorder by the way as far as I'm concern. There's body dysmorphia too, but I don't have that.
 

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Ew, what? Sorry, I didn't wanted to sound aggressive, why everyone think I'm being aggressive? I didn't felt threatened by anything you said, I found your comment interesting with a lot of things I could relate to, that's why I responded to you. I would also like to know why I'm like that, but we haven't an answer yet and that wouldn't change our conditions, and when I speak of conditions, I speak of all those behaviour we have regarding romance, love and sex.

It affects my social life too, I have never been told before to go in a psychiatric hospital or to kill myself and to pray to be born again a woman. I was merely willing to point that the problem is who decide what is the norm, you're normal, I'm normal, everyone is normal. The problem are the people who are pissing us off, because they embody the "norm" and we don't.

If you're looking at the biological reasons why people are homosexual, the answer will be biological. What do we do when we have biological answers while having an homophobic society? Eugenics. I don't want that, neither do you. I can't imagine that what you're going through pushed you to think that we should control birth, so no homosexuals are born, and thus don't suffer. That's why I asked you: "Why do you care?" It's because nothing will be better if you look into biology, there're no medication for that, cause it's not a sickness.

I'm really sorry you took that badly my intervention. I just wanted to point out that your struggles won't be solved there, or maybe they will. Do you think you'll live better if you know the why of your condition? How do you think you'll do that? I'm genuinly interested, cause I found nothing there. We can help eachother, or so I think.





And it's gender dysphoria, and it isn't a mental disorder by the way as far as I'm concern. There's body dysmorphia too, but I don't have that.
I’m sorry that I misunderstood your post. I’d also like it if we helped each other, I can’t exactly talk to anyone in real life. That forum is the first place I’ve ever written that.

I’m not a native speaker so I messed up the term but Gender Dysphoria is in DSM-5 so it’s a mental disorder.

I want to understand the reason so that I can stop feeling like a mentally fucked up weirdo and find out whether there is an actual biological underlying mechanism. In real life I’ve only ever told two people how I feel and both told me that only hedonistic perverts can feel any attraction to the same sex and since I’m a chaste person I must be simply confused. It’s like depression, only after the chemical imbalances in the brain was shown that people started to take it seriously instead of saying to stop whinging.

If it has to do with in utero hormonal imbalances then that would make it an enviromental factor, nothing to do with eugenics. I’ve also read somewhere that men with older brothers tend to be gay due to that reason.
 

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Thread Reminder

Please stay on the topic which the OP wishes to discuss and avoid derailing advice threads.
Members are encouraged to take any off topic discussion to pm or create their own thread.

Thank you
 

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Oops, I'm guilty of off-topic, I'll edit my comment.

I’m sorry that I misunderstood your post. I’d also like it if we helped each other, I can’t exactly talk to anyone in real life. That forum is the first place I’ve ever written that.
No problem, I didn't took times to try to convey my mood or emotions through the text. It's definitely harder to convey this in text, but I could have done the effort.

I’m not a native speaker so I messed up the term but Gender Dysphoria is in DSM-5 so it’s a mental disorder.
We can say so, my point is just that if I'm accepted for who I'm, I'm not hurting people or myself. While someone with body dysmorphia will constantly hate their body or their face and no level of acceptance coming from people around them can really alleviate their pain. To make it short.

I want to understand the reason so that I can stop feeling like a mentally fucked up weirdo and find out whether there is an actual biological underlying mechanism. In real life I’ve only ever told two people how I feel and both told me that only hedonistic perverts can feel any attraction to the same sex and since I’m a chaste person I must be simply confused. It’s like depression, only after the chemical imbalances in the brain was shown that people started to take it seriously instead of saying to stop whinging.


If it has to do with in utero hormonal imbalances then that would make it an enviromental factor, nothing to do with eugenics. I’ve also read somewhere that men with older brothers tend to be gay due to that reason.
Oh, I see. Effectively, usually, people, when they hear that there's a biological origin, it means that you aren't at fault. And there's definitely a biological origin, we're biological beings, so even the content of our thoughts is biological, or maybe you think that it is in your spirit? I don't have a problem if you think it so. But to be treated of perverts has nothing to do with biology, and yeah we cannot change people mind. This feel of powerlessness when you're treated badly for something you didn't choose is present in the everyday life of many of us.

I can propose something, you don't need to approve, and this can work too for the OP maybe. I'll put in bold what was supposed to concern the OP too, even if the context can help.

You said you can't stop feeling... bad, let's say, about yourself for who you are. I never really could say to myself and believe that this was just something that "normal" people are telling me, to be a "bad" person, it's like in your flesh. But actually, in reality, it's something that people have told you, we aren't "bad" people.

Maybe there's something wrong with me, but I firmly believe that there's nothing more beautiful and where love can be materialized to its fullest through making love, me as woman, with the body of one, with another woman. I feel a bit sick, more than a bit actually, more like a monster, that I can come to this belief while not being able to experience this for the next two years to come, and to never have lived that before. But I have that in mind since young. I didn't thought it was for me, I just thought abstractly that, there's nothing more beautiful and which embodies love more than a couple of women, that's how I felt, and I didn't thought about sex at all, just a kiss for example.

But I was actually accused of being gay, cause everyone was seeing me, me included, as being a guy who struggle with women. So I was humiliated cause I didn't act manly enough, thus I didn't grow with bad ideas about being lesbian, but about being gay. I would had grown as sick as you of myself if it would have turn out I was gay.

So I've been told what it's to be a "normal" man, and I struggled with it, but I didn't learn what it is to be a normal woman thus I've never been able to judge badly women for anything they were doing. And I imagine that because I wasn't concerned for a long time, by everything women, hetero, homo or bi, had to endure. I can fancy much more a loving couple of women than, for example, a romance about a man and a woman in a film, I never could stand this for my whole life, still cannot. There's a freedom to not have been aimed, through most of my life, by insults and harassment which would now concerns me. I could say I'm lucky.

So, my question would be that: Can you fancy being with a woman (or any partner) as you are now? And would you feel good about it?

I mean, we are who we are, any understanding of the biological "why", won't change us, it will change the perception the people have of us, and it may be good enough. And we will be who we want to be, if our dream isn't completely absurd and out of reach. If there's a world where women can't love eachother, and men alike, the world is fucked up, not us. Same for people who doesn't follow the "normal" pass of their assigned gender at birth, they have the same rights.

It's not just other people who can be loved, we can too, everyone deserve to live that, we're also subject of love, and if we feel like we deserve it now, for who we're now, then we're ready, and if we have to prepare ourself a bit more, then we'll be ready later. :)
 

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Feeling strong and energized, and enjoying my libido without feeling enslaved by it.
You also have another thread asking for advice on how to get more energy. If that’s the main problem you should definitely have your blood levels and hormones checked. It could also be a symptom of depression or caused by the changing weather.

You say you don’t like danger but maybe you could try exposing yourself to non-dangerous adrenaline sources like amusement parks or bungee jumping. Maybe try board games for competitiveness. Swimming is an excellent sport, you could look into that if you don’t want to get too bulky or immediately lose whatever you’ve gained after skipping it for a couple of days.

Self-reliance is also a big thing that is usually expected from men. You could try to learn practical everyday skills and save enough money to not require help from outside.

Nothing I can say about libido, you’ll have to control that through your willpower.

So, my question would be that: Can you fancy being with a woman (or any partner) as you are now? And would you feel good about it?
Not really, that was my point. I’d like to be either a feminine woman or an actual guy. It’s like if I was born a man I’d be perfectly normal, even admired; life would be much easier too. I’m not a butch lesbian, I look like a normal woman but my actions and words are off and people can tell. Due to religious reasons I can’t ever be with women, that’s why I’ve never pursued them. That being said I think we should take any further discussion on this to PM as the mod said.
 
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