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I feel like my boyfriend can never prioritize me. I am not certain if he's ambitious enough for me. And I'm not sure he really loves me or just the convenience of having a partner.

I'm not sure he's good for me. I love him and I don't know if I should stop doing so.

Just today, I tried spicing up the day by trying to get to know him in a deeper level. I gave him philosophical questions and he said he'll do it but expressed how much of a headache the activity is. I just told him to not do it if he can't. He complied.

I feel like there's nothing developing here. I'm quite tired of trying to fight for the possibility of us. So what I will do is go here in this thread and speak my mind so I can start detaching from him. I'm tired of asking for more time.
 

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I'm getting annoyed, which really sucks. Because I told him I loved him just the other day and he said it back, and now I'm getting annoyed by stuff I don't think he'll respond kindly to if I bring it up. Yet I fully feel I meant it when I expressed my feelings.

For one:

-He didn't take kindly to me telling him I was annoyed that he barely left me any of the beers I paid for. I was more than happy to share. But because it's his house, he started going on how I was messing up this "communal fridge" system, and saying he didn't like my tone (I was being as calm as I possibly could.) It seemed so hard for him to simply understand where I was coming from but I let it go once I told him he should just buy all the beers from now on if he wanted to drink them all.

-He has massive OCD and criticizes every move I make. I don't need a second mother. Especially not one who's a dude.

-All he ever wants to do is stay in the house and play video games or watch TV. Now we HAVE to do that because of this fucking virus. He says, "This is what I usually do." Ok and? We don't need to sit around ALL the time. That's not healthy for anyone. We were friends a while before dating so I get why there wasn't really a courting type of period. Still, there's so much we can do and you just wanna sit and be complacent all the time.

I feel I'm being taken for granted, honestly. I'm far from perfect but I'm always open to being politely told how I can change.
I feel the same way--being taken for granted. :( They probably don't mean to hurt us. Does this mean we're better off with another person? I hate how life doesn't come with manuals.
 

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I feel the same way--being taken for granted. :( They probably don't mean to hurt us. Does this mean we're better off with another person? I hate how life doesn't come with manuals.
I would never wanna give unwanted advice. But I'll say that in regards to my own experience, I did end up breaking up with him and have no remorse over it whatsoever. For me it wasn't so much a matter of, is another person gonna be better, because I never know if I'll even meet someone else honestly. It seems you saw my post about wanting to settle down? I still feel that way but I guess it's a matter of priorities; I would rather risk being alone forever and making myself happy than spend what little time I have on Earth with someone I don't get along with. Which in the end is why I dumped him.
 

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I feel like my boyfriend can never prioritize me. I am not certain if he's ambitious enough for me. And I'm not sure he really loves me or just the convenience of having a partner.

I'm not sure he's good for me. I love him and I don't know if I should stop doing so.

Just today, I tried spicing up the day by trying to get to know him in a deeper level. I gave him philosophical questions and he said he'll do it but expressed how much of a headache the activity is. I just told him to not do it if he can't. He complied.

I feel like there's nothing developing here. I'm quite tired of trying to fight for the possibility of us. So what I will do is go here in this thread and speak my mind so I can start detaching from him. I'm tired of asking for more time.
Ugh, I hate it when I'm with someone who doesn't want to dig deeper.

Sometimes I miss her so much. Her mind would dig up just about anything... Like a daym archaeologist at a historical site. Except the soil is your poor little brain.

Is that really so unusual? Are people usually so... shallow? Ugh, I can feel myself getting dumber and shallower by the day. Or maybe that was all there is to me. Hah...
 

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Ugh, I hate it when I'm with someone who doesn't want to dig deeper.

Sometimes I miss her so much. Her mind would dig up just about anything... Like a daym archaeologist at a historical site. Except the soil is your poor little brain.

Is that really so unusual? Are people usually so... shallow? Ugh, I can feel myself getting dumber and shallower by the day. Or maybe that was all there is to me. Hah...
life itself is pretty damn shallow, there really isnt much to it once youve "figured it out" even the philopshical eventually loops back on itself and ends up being the same thing over and over again. kinda like "new movies" they are all rehashes of the same thing.

The end path of "deeper exploration" is eventually reaching nihilism and see that nothing has an point etc.
 

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I’ve never fallen in love. I’ve dated and felt infatuation but never love and it’s always been extremely easy for me to get over break-ups. I wonder if people call liking someone “love” or I’m just dead inside.
There are a few different types of infatuation though... and love... the way I experienced some aspects:
With like or love, when you see the person you love nothing else exists around them. Your brain suddenly filters everything out and perfectly concentrates on the object of your desire. It even filters sounds. It's like warm waves in your heart/chest area. I don't remember if I had the "butterfly" feelings, but it definitely felt good, even without physical contact. Just proximity and talking, lol. I'm not even able to recall if I was acting strangely, weird or dumb, because my anesthetized brain didn't feel shame or anything. It's a feeling that also gives you a lot more courage and the desire to try new things. To do crazy things to meet that person. I've only felt that once in my life and I was young, it never became a relationship because, although the guy was feeling similar, it did not feel right to make it a 1.5 months-only relationship as it was the city where I was spending my summer at only (grandparents) and otherwise I was busy with school. My parents were very over protective and it did not occur to me I could travel to meet this person (train services not very good). truth is I probably wouldn't have been able to and the idea of distance really irked me. I chose to not start anything because I feared the pain that would come afterwards and I sensed it. I was young but interestingly wise I'd say. A big part of me regretted for years for not taking the step in at least telling this boy what I felt. He tried to and I kept it very rational. My defense or coping system/mechanism was turning to rationalism and shutting emotions when I thought a situation was getting too heated. Eh but I still made it obvious through my behavior that I liked that guy. Anyways... we were both young and stupid and day dreaming and no kissing seemed good enough and safer. We were friends. People would call this a crush. I think it was more. A sort of mutual compatibility, but inexperience. We happened to meet accidentally 8 years later and we stared at each other and talked as if we were mystified, despite him actually being with another girl where I met him. I realized the feelings for him never went away; his for me either, perhaps, but because we (I) never game them course to manifest, well... I suppose, no pain. We were both physically very changed... yet we recognized each other instantly. A powerful surge of emotions, good ones. It's a damn long time to keep something like that inside you. I think I let them go past that moment though. If it had been a relationship and then a break-up perhaps the feelings would have stung a little. I did regret we couldn't be together though but that is different.

Attachment to someone you've accepted around yourself as a partner can be very strong too.

Then there is sexual attraction, where touching a part of the other person's body sends tingles in both people. Say you touch hands, the tingles run through your arm and create sensual feelings. Say they touch your face, or kiss your shoulder... this one I think is the most common. It comes from desire and seeing the person in a positive light, from desire of "unification" even if momentary. I consider it frugal though, so I always wait and do the time test see if it persists or is just lust.
 

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I'm an energetic and ambitious person so I seem to attract guys that either have no ambition in life - at all - or they are so ambitious that we have no time together. Is there such thing as a happy medium??
 

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I want to reconnect...I honestly miss you and I have for months, but I'm afraid of going back to that state, and my awareness of how little you care hurts my pride quite a bit. And that's something I can't have.

It hurts.
 

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Can't you just reply like a normal person? Then again I like you because you aren't. But it really breaks me to pieces waiting for your answer knowing fully well it'll never come... It is not about the answer it is about talking to you in general. It makes me so happy to simply talk to you.
 

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Distance is an illusion. It's a cop out for people who don't want to be close.

If I pushed you away, it means that I love you and I believe that you deserve better. Better than me.
Because your happiness matters more than mine.

Remember that somebody loves you. Take care.
 

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I think I’m finally over being single.

I’ve noticed an unpleasant tendency in myself to section myself off for others. People in my life know me as a reserved academic, or a slightly-crazy party girl, or a fairly normal, affectionate girl who’s probably eager to settle down eventually. To the point where I will at times mention something about myself that seems totally normal, but is incongruent with what the other person knows of me so far, and they’ll be stunned and baffled. E.g. I described my night out clubbing to someone with whom I had mainly had conversations about history so far with and he was initially disbelieving and thought I was joking.

Romantically, this is a problem because deep down I feel whoever falls in love with me will only love one part of me, not the whole person. I have no intention of settling and that means I’m likely to reject anyone who comes my way for the foreseeable future. Love for me is equatable to compromise.

But this year has been changing that. I’ve met a few people who are in some ways like me. And my tendency to only reveal myself in bits and pieces, and to assume other people are less complex than I am, has made connection with them harder than it need be. But I’m now beginning to see a way forward. Even though I claim to not want to settle, I’ve in truth never felt myself capable of doing anything else. I think, however, that this is a deeply-held conviction which I'm at last losing, and I’m pleased and excited to see what that means for me moving forward.
 

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does someone want to psychoanalyze my seemingly endless cycle of giving love advice to guys that i accidentally end up liking

this time he likes my best friend lmaooo
 

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I want my SO to be my bestie first lover second. Lucky for me my SO feels the same way <3. I feel romantic relationships are more fulfilling if you are best friends too.
 

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Have feelings for a friend of mine. It's possible she has feelings too but I'm not going to risk it because I don't want to make the friendship awkward or anything. Just leave things be.

Sent from my SM-G960U using Tapatalk
 

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Just seeing a picture of an Asian couple reminds me of him and makes me want to run into his arms... I am not sure if he will ever take me back, though. I meet none of his requirements, and might never. But he definitely has a special place in my heart. If only he would come pick me up (and hammer me into the kind of woman he wants).
 

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does someone want to psychoanalyze my seemingly endless cycle of giving love advice to guys that i accidentally end up liking

this time he likes my best friend lmaooo
Oh certainly, I love love-and-relationship psychoanalysis.

Do you think you feel more attracted to them and/or able to approach them when they are open emotionally, and/or focused on someone other than you?
 

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I feel caught between two places, with one person who I am no longer in love with, and will not let go. Another who is like a shiny star, that is often distance but has me twinkling every time we are together.
 
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