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I'm not sure if this is going to get much of a response or not, but I've noticed that ENFPs, of both genders, tend to go for introverts, so i thought i'd ask this question.

What do think the differences are between getting a shy person to respond to your interest vs a non-shy person? being overwhelmingly likely to be the type to be assertive and to lead an interaction, when we meet a person whom we are interested in, and who is shy, we end up being "in charge" of the interaction- even more so as a guy.

I often find that instead of the interaction being an even split with the woman sometimes being aggressive, or at most 60-40% male-female, sometimes you can get it between 70/80-20/30% male-female; or even vice versa where ENFP females end up leading the interaction with introverted males. apart from one confident INFJ i've met, who could match me for people-intuition, i've always felt like the leader and decider in romantic interactions early on. Anyway, what are some differences between the "regular" interaction and the "extrovert-> introvert interaction"?

One thing i've noticed is that extroverts tend to "test" your behaviour far more than introverts- they want to know whether you are someone who will make them feel valued for hanging out with you. introverts can be more concerned with their shared values and common experiences with you because they are less concerned with shallow concepts about social perspectives.

Interesting insights on the same wavelength as this thread represents are well appreciated.
 

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One thing i've noticed is that extroverts tend to "test" your behaviour far more than introverts- they want to know whether you are someone who will make them feel valued for hanging out with you. introverts can be more concerned with their shared values and common experiences with you because they are less concerned with shallow concepts about social perspectives.
I think this is incredibly true. From my observation, ENFPs can easily friend introverts because it becomes a cooperative relationship of the extrovert being able to count on having a meaningful friend and the introvert being able to count on having alone time b/c the extrovert tends to have many friends. At the same time, an introvert will give the majority of their focus on those few friends or SO, which the ENFP craves (can't get enough attention, can you?) LOL
 
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Introverts are not necessarily shy, same goes for extroverts being (non-shy).

I don't like leading or being led, i admire harmony in interaction, if there's something that i want to know or get at i've learned that the most honorable / dignifying way is the most direct way. If the ratio is too askew - in an unbalanced situation, then the side who has a need or a want is the one who pushes, and i'm no pusher, i'll be direct and clear as i can possibly be, but not pushy.
 

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The few Extroverts I've dated I found really annoying! They were all E*T* and I know now, avoid E*T* missus, it's not going to work, for me at least.

I have always found shy, quiet people intriguing because I want to know what is going on in there. Sometimes (and not often) it's nothing and I'm like 'meh' and flutter off to the next person. Often there's this rich, intricate treasure box to explore, regardless of whether its a romantic interest or just a human interest in another person.

The people I have had the most interesting and fulfilling relationships with in my life have all been Is. They are a challenge. To win them over excites me. Their opinion is not often as readily given, so more of a reward to achieve. For them to open up to you is something special, because they don't just open up to everyone. In fact, the more private the I person is, the more fascinating I find them, especially if there is an obvious connection of values and interests.

As I have got older I have got a lot better at developing patience. I am stronger and surer in myself and I am much, Much better at not just running up to people and being all "Hey! I like you! I think you like me! Let's go!' which bowled over a few poor unsuspecting Is in my younger life and ended in road crashes for us both. I am happy to wait now for the I person to warm up enough to make the move if they want to. I create opportunities, but I am never initiating 'the talk' again. I am simply creating open, happy, comfortable spaces to share time with these people that I care about, and who I draw great joy and strength from knowing care about and make time for me. @Shale has the nail smacked right on the head there :)

And Is do take the initiative if the Es will just shut up, calm down and let them :) We just can get so insistent in our desire for attention we don't allow enough space, and then get all judge-y and naggy at the poor I for not responding to us on our schedule. No wonder Is then back off ;) I wouldn't want to spend time with me when I'm in paranoid, organising, bossy me me me mode either.

And Is do test us, all the time :) If they've backed off and are not meting you half way you failed the test perhaps....
 
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