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Discussion Starter #1
My post in the Confessions of an INTP thread inspired me to start this topic.

Do you sabotage yourself? Every time I get close to success (in anything), I seem to sabotage myself. I'm not sure if it is fear of failure, fear of success, or something else that is causing me to get in my own way.
 

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I always do this. It's like learning a subject learning it is good enough. I do not need to master the subject. I guessing it's the same with success for some of us. The last time I self sabbotaged myself management was constantly gloating about a average employee's merits in regards to sales, effieciency, productivity, customer retention and other areas the company tracked. With minimal effort I exceeded the hotshot's numbers and then attention turned to me. I was being asked "how did you do it" in front of everyone, and being introduced to corporate pukes constantly. I despised the attention and quickly retreated back to mediocrity to evade the spotlights shining on me. I simply wanted wanted to see for myself how I or the system could improve.

If success causes me to become a public spectacle, I suspect I will always implode.
 

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Discussion Starter #5
It's like learning a subject learning it is good enough. I do not need to master the subject.

If success causes me to become a public spectacle, I suspect I will always implode.
Yes - it is the INTP "jack-of-all-trades, master-of-none" thing.

Ha! I do the same. I like to stay under the radar.
 

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Discussion Starter #6
Snakecharmer, will you give your examples of self sabbotage?
I'm not sure this site has enough bandwidth...

But, here are some examples:
*Procrastinate to the point that I lose a deal, miss a deadline, etc
*Decided I didn't want to finish a masters program when I only had a few classes left to complete
*Stopped practicing hypnotherapy right around the time I started building a solid base of clients
*Changed my mind about going to nursing school after successfully completing all of the pre-reqs

I could go on and on...

When I was a kid, I'd spend lots of time on homework assignments, only to procrastinate and turn them in late, or not turn them in at all. This baffled my parents. I understand why. I remember them asking me "WHY?" and not having answers for them.
 

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Discussion Starter #8
Multidisciplined degree are the future. You're already successful and dont' even know it. haha
I do have a BS in Health and am a class or two away from one in Marketing. I'm still shocked that I managed to complete that much. I'd like to get a masters or a PhD, but I lose interest in things too quickly to complete things that require that kind of time commitment. lol
 

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I'm not sure this site has enough bandwidth...
When I was a kid, I'd spend lots of time on homework assignments, only to procrastinate and turn them in late, or not turn them in at all. This baffled my parents. I understand why. I remember them asking me "WHY?" and not having answers for them.

Oh man, I used to do that all the time....
 
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I didnt pursue the education route because of my idealism when I was younger. Im smart can learn anything and will succeed with my own natural abilities. I'll prove myself without relying upon an expensive credential which only shows you did the all that work. Little did I know then that my personality would be my worst enemy. My career experiance has taken me from construction, aircraft maintenance, real estate, investigations, entrepreneur, to pest control. Whats next? Marketing!
 

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I wish I didn't know about things before they happened. The boring stuff, like work, obligations, planned events. If I woke up every day and was faced with new and random challenges, that would be the life for me. For example I have somewhere to be in a few hours but I haven't slept yet and I know I'm going to be half retarded when I get there. You would think knowing this about myself, that I can't sleep before planned events, would prevent the self-destruction but nope. I welcome it.
 

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Discussion Starter #12
My career experiance has taken me from construction, aircraft maintenance, real estate, investigations, entrepreneur, to pest control. Whats next? Marketing!
I own a residential and commercial cleaning company, and some days it takes me a MASSIVE amount of effort to push myself to work on my business. lol
 

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I'm incredibly lazy to finish stuff. I doesn't help that I have so many things to do, and I end up finishing them at the last minute.

Then it doesn't look as good as it should, but now I don't have time to repair it.

And when I don't have a deadline, don't expect it to be done in less than the production time of Chinese Democracy or Duke Nukem Forever.
 

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Discussion Starter #14
Oh man, I used to do that all the time....
Did your parents (and teachers) say, "You are SO smart...why don't you show it?" etc etc etc...?
 
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I've never sabotaged myself.
 

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Did your parents (and teachers) say, "You are SO smart...why don't you show it?" etc etc etc...?
Parents teachers when I was younger and now that Im older. employers and new friends wonder "why dont you live up to your full potential". I dont have an answer. Im I lazy? Does forcing myself to succeed stress me out? Have I associated my definition being becomming sucessfull with being a self promoting and greedy? I do not know or won't admit I'm lazy because I'm not if Im doing something Im passionate about.
 

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Besides being lazy and doing things last minute, I don't think so.
 

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Sometimes I slave over essays but I just can't bring myself to compose that last paragraph.

And whenever that happens, I'm always hoping that my teacher won't allow me to turn it in late so that I can just forget about it. I don't like that feeling in the back of my mind that's say "you still could get half credit if you spent just fifteen minutes..."

Once I"ve decided I'm not going to complete an assignment, I see it as a lost cause. I can't bring myself to type another word.
 

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this speaks to me.

Junior high - could not bring myself to apply for prefect-ship. I had all the required qualifications, and more. But the moment I saw one of my least favorite people filling out the application form; I just didn't want in anymore. (and got yelled at by parent persons when they found out it was past application deadline and I hadn't)

Highschool - read above.

Last summer - was sharing a dishwashing shift with a friend. Apparently I was doing such a swell job that the staff and management decided to kick out the friend and hire me full time. I ... didn't want in after that so we both left. Some people laughed at me for being naive and all that, but it's not how I roll.

First 3 Semesters in college - kept getting 79s and 78s as GPAs; while knowing very well that I could be an honors student if I pushed a bit more. Couldn't be bothered.

Same could be said for countless women who I knew back then. But it's high time I shut up. Or shutted up, as my little cousin would say.
 
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