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This evening I find myself wondering what the hell is wrong with me. Anyway on Saturday I ended up asking a coworker out for Thursday. She ended up turning me down because she has school that day, and instead suggested we go to a party this Friday and gave me her number.

Here it is Tuesday and I find myself thinking I should text her but can't bring myself to do it. I just keep overthinking what I should say and not sending anything.

Obviously I just need to stop overthinking this shit. Having said that any advice on preventing overthinking these kind of situations would be appreciated.
 

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Listen to @Erbse
Very wise advice.
I call it the, "Fuck it, we'll do it live." Attitude.
Also, start with hey, hello, heyo, heya, hiya, hi, heyhey (pick one) "it's so and so."
AND
good luck man.
go get em.
 
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Get curious. Don't you want to know what's going to happen if you contact her? And don't pretend you're intuitive enough to know what is going to happen.
 

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Get curious. Don't you want to know what's going to happen if you contact her? And don't pretend you're intuitive enough to know what is going to happen.
Most ISTP's will not be curious, because whatever happens, happens.

'Just see what gives'-attitude is quite a chunk different than genuine curiosity.

The second sentence is just about the most ridiculous statement I've read here in a while (or just really badly phrased :tongue:). Quite a feat, given that recent weird thread created by urwhatuthink or something like that.

Pinning down people for what they are is one of our major feats :mellow:

This may also be the cause why we consider everyone else boring in the first place.

Shudders.
 

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I usually send them something funny to break the ice. Like an embarrassing story or something I found online. Bitches like funny stuff.

Or you could just ask a question. Google "best first date questions" and just pick one. Shit's easy, man.
Something like: "So, before we go out, have you ever murdered anyone? 'Cause murder is a deal breaker. I don't want to end up in the river on Friday."

If she continues the conversation, you're golden. If not, put down the phone and go furiously masturbate.

Either way, win-win.
 

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Be more "in the moment" then you usually are. Don't think too much about consequences.

Don't think "I shouldn't say this, it would probably backfire;" instead, think: "Fuck it, let's just see what happens." You can always expand upon what you've said before. By saying something really cool afterwards, you put less emphasis on the brainfarts you accidently let out.

Also, read the Mystery Method.
 

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Most ISTP's will not be curious, because whatever happens, happens.
'Just see what gives'-attitude is quite a chunk different than genuine curiosity.
Maybe it's adventurous then. Do you want to go on an adventure? Yes! Yes! Yes!
Or maybe it's efficiency: spending five minutes on something that will take five minutes. As opposed to spending five minutes doing the deed and 2 days and 6 hours thinking about it.
 

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Repeat to yourself: All things in life are fifty/fifty. Either a thing will happen or it won't. This is especially true with women.


As to the text, just give her a plan: "Looking forward to Friday. I'll pick you up at eight" She'll either agree or counter offer, either way, you're the one initiating and making it easy for her to just follow along. Short and to the point stops over thinking.
 

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What's the worst that can happen? Text her a corny joke. When she responds and says it was funny. Then tell her you thought she could use a smile and your job was done and you look forward to going to the party on Friday. Get out your head and into your life. Nothing ventured .... nothing gained.
 

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Look at it this way:

You like this girl and obviously she is at least interested in you.

BE YOURSELF. Yes, you like her, I get it. Seriously, be yourself. If she doesn't like you because you were YOU then she isn't meant for you. Stop worrying about doing the "right" thing and do your thing. Okay?
 

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As to the text, just give her a plan: "Looking forward to Friday. I'll pick you up at eight" She'll either agree or counter offer, either way, you're the one initiating and making it easy for her to just follow along. Short and to the point stops over thinking.
I like this. I'll have to remember it for next time
 

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Jung’s Portrait of the INTP / ISTP Types (Introverted Thinkers)
"... a vague dread of the other sex also belongs to this category."


Fucking dew it man, lol!! On behalf of all Ti-dominants who over-think when dealing with the opposite sex - you've got nothing to lose, stop thinking and dew itt! haha good luck man
 

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dude, you're not asking for her hand in marriage. worse case scenario she bails on you...big deal. call the girl ffs.

..btw don't listen to the "be yourself" advice...trust me, it never works lol
 
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