I'm always at a loss on how to start off what I want to say so I may as well just plunge into it and sort it out from there.
I notice that sometimes, not all the time, but sometimes, there are moments when I'm feeling frisky but don't really want to have sex. Not that sex isn't great, because it very well can be. But sometimes it's just better to fantasize and masturbate vs. having sex, or sometimes, just fantasize and leave it at that. O_-
It isn't about being selfish or not wanting to get the other person revved up either. It isn't about just wanting to get off and being done with it. When I fantasize, I'm going through a small script of whatever is in my head that's sexually exciting and I can rewind, replay, slow down or speed up whatever I'm thinking about.
I find you can't really do that during sex. You can't just stop in the middle of something and look into his eyes, "Hey, do that again, just like before. Okay, good, one more time because it was really hot."
You know? I'd almost be willing to say the fantasy is more satisfying at times because it lets you watch instead of being wrapped up in the moment. Having sex gets me out of my head and so I can't focus or drift at will. Fantasy for me is mental while sex is primarily focused on the physical and what's happening to me and not whatever it is I'm thinking.
Maybe it's just because I've got a crazy imagination? Maybe because my boyfriend is just very tame for the most part and I'm not? Although, sometimes I even end up fantasizing about regular sex so perhaps that isn't it...
But don't get me wrong. There's times I do want to get into the moment, feel everything happening at once, the overwhelming rush of the whole experience. But those other times, I'd rather just relax and "watch the show" and feel my body's response to it.
Do other people get like this? My boyfriend doesn't really. He's more of the mind of "if you're going to fantasize or tease, sex should happen at the end." lol -.- So, I'm wondering if its just a female thing, a type thing, or something else, maybe?
I hope I'm explaining this well enough. /facepalm :blushed:
I notice that sometimes, not all the time, but sometimes, there are moments when I'm feeling frisky but don't really want to have sex. Not that sex isn't great, because it very well can be. But sometimes it's just better to fantasize and masturbate vs. having sex, or sometimes, just fantasize and leave it at that. O_-
It isn't about being selfish or not wanting to get the other person revved up either. It isn't about just wanting to get off and being done with it. When I fantasize, I'm going through a small script of whatever is in my head that's sexually exciting and I can rewind, replay, slow down or speed up whatever I'm thinking about.
I find you can't really do that during sex. You can't just stop in the middle of something and look into his eyes, "Hey, do that again, just like before. Okay, good, one more time because it was really hot."
You know? I'd almost be willing to say the fantasy is more satisfying at times because it lets you watch instead of being wrapped up in the moment. Having sex gets me out of my head and so I can't focus or drift at will. Fantasy for me is mental while sex is primarily focused on the physical and what's happening to me and not whatever it is I'm thinking.
Maybe it's just because I've got a crazy imagination? Maybe because my boyfriend is just very tame for the most part and I'm not? Although, sometimes I even end up fantasizing about regular sex so perhaps that isn't it...
But don't get me wrong. There's times I do want to get into the moment, feel everything happening at once, the overwhelming rush of the whole experience. But those other times, I'd rather just relax and "watch the show" and feel my body's response to it.
Do other people get like this? My boyfriend doesn't really. He's more of the mind of "if you're going to fantasize or tease, sex should happen at the end." lol -.- So, I'm wondering if its just a female thing, a type thing, or something else, maybe?
I hope I'm explaining this well enough. /facepalm :blushed: