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After marriage there is an assumption that spouses sleep together in one bed. It creates closiness.
Personally, I hate sharing bed with anybody. I need space. It is more mental need, than physical one because bed may be huge but it is still uncomfortable. Even sleeping in the same room is invasive.
Is there any person here who feels the same? Any thoughts, experiences about it?
 

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I don't like sleeping with anyone I'm not emotionally attached to... asked my husband to sleep in the guest room when sharing a bed with him became closer than I wanted to be. I needed the space, as you said, and I wanted my privacy back. But it was not a happy thing.
 

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I don't like sleeping with anyone I'm not emotionally attached to... asked my husband to sleep in the guest room when sharing a bed with him became closer than I wanted to be. I needed the space, as you said, and I wanted my privacy back. But it was not a happy thing.

As I understood, you sleep seperately now?
How did it effectect your marriage? I do not want invade, so if you don't want, don't answer to it.
 

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I don't mind sleeping in the same bed but I just wish it was a larger-sized bed because it's always so cramped. We have a full-sized bed now and I wish we had a queen instead. I get sleep paralysis sometimes and I need room to spread out in order to reduce the chance of that happening.

However I wouldn't want to sleep in an entirely different bed from my partner. That would get kind of lonely.
 

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Years of sleeping in tiny narrow dorm beds has meant that I sleep best when there's somebody to take up some of the space in my queen sized bed and I also feel a lot safer sleeping with someone because I have a lot of nightmares and am still, at 22, mostly afraid of the dark and what undoubtedly hides in my closet and under my bed.

I don't think I could sleep with my partner in anything less than a king sized bed long-term, though, because we both like to sleep wrapped around giant, fluffy, person-width pillows and that gets kind of cramped in anything smaller. God help our children; we'll probably make them sleep on a cot in the corner if they get scared at night and come rushing to mommy and daddy for comfort.
 

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Okay husband, here's the deal, your house is next-door to mine. Your own property is your own liability. You punch a hole in the wall while playing video games, you're responsible for the property damage >_>

I'm kidding I'm kidding. I can understand this, I find people talking to me or trying to keep me awake as I'm falling asleep very invasive, and puts my mind out of where I want it to be. "What's wrong, dear? You look weird." "That's because I'm falling asleep love!" *Stops falling asleep*
 

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As I understood, you sleep seperately now?
How did it effectect your marriage? I do not want invade, so if you don't want, don't answer to it.
Yes, we've been sleeping separately for two years now (and he's moving out soon.)

My side of the marriage was already dead, so for me it was an improvement. It aligned physical reality with the mental reality that we were only room mates, not lovers.
 

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I wouldn't mind too much, I don't really care. I do kind of get annoyed when people have meticulous preferences though, I don't know, it makes them seem kind of spoiled or like a brat. Not saying that you guys necessarily are, just it seems rather innocuous.
 

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I find some "meticulous" preferences to be rather adorable, but it depends on what. Anyways, as for sharing a bed - on my own, I very much value my personal sleeping space and I'll take the privacy and space I can get because I have been sharing a room with my friend for the past (almost) four years. Before that, I've shared a room with two other people for about two. So, for six years, besides maybe a stretch of a few months, I have not had my own room. I do get this room to myself a lot a great deal of the time lately due to my friend's work/school schedule, but night time is always the same. I've slept alone 2-3 weeks (adding up times she's been away) in the past 4 years. So, yeah, I greatly value the fact that I have my own bed and I don't like to share it with anyone.

I am in a relationship (though it is long distance right now) and if we were together, I would immensely enjoy sharing a bed with my SO. However, I can get hot quickly and I'm not one to cuddle throughout the night, even if it is an ideal. XD That's been my experience with super warm bodied boys (nearly twice my size), so we'll have to see how it is in the future. I'm quite snuggly so I would enjoy it. I just need a bit of room for myself to do my mid-sleep acrobatics. :p If we have a big bed, even better!
 
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I have a similar preference...

and additional private space.

and at least some separation

or tagging in our libraries.
 

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Same bed, separate blankets so when she rips them off in the middle of the night I don't transform into an icicle. Why would I want to sleep elsewhere? If I have an SO she provides comfort, a sense of security, I know she's alright in the night and she can do the same for me. Plus it's someone to warm my feet on. :)
 

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I prefer to be alone with everything I do, not just sleeping. Though when I was in love I did want to sleep by her. But that was the love wanting it, not me.
 
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Me and my husband are sharing the same bed, along with our dog. :p Dog can be annoying as he's more and less big and likes to sleep on us sometimes.

I liked sleeping alone when it comes to having my own bed, no noise or movement, but then I'm used to sleeping with my husband now, and sleeping alone is a bit scary and lonely. Thought I need to have enough space and I prefer to sleep on my own side. I also roll a lot so that cuddling during sleeping is uncomfortable for me.
 

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My body temperature drops during the night and I get much colder than I was the first few hours. I usually cuddle up to him for heat during the night. If I'm pissed off, I put my cold feet on his legs. He says they're like blocks of ice. When we go camping or somewhere without AC during the summer, he likes to cuddle up to me because I'm cold when I sleep, even on a hot sticky night.

He's a heater and I'm an AC. If one of us are away, I stuck having to wear pj's and socks and extra blankets. That's no way to sleep man. Naked is the only good way to sleep.

He snores when he's on his back and sleeps heavy. The only way to get him to turn over is to hit him with a pillow. His younger brother used to throw tennis balls at his head to get him to turn over. He doesn't hear anyone yelling at him. His ex used to put ice down his back when he was snoring. Being hit with a pillow is mild.

I think I'd feel a little hurt if my spouse didn't want to sleep in the same bed. We're not talking about FWB's or ONS or low key relationship here. This is the person I'm planning to spend the rest of my life with.
 
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