Personality Cafe banner

1 - 13 of 13 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
806 Posts
Discussion Starter #1
You know something I've noticed? People keep on bringing up the idea of a shy extrovert, but what about shy introverts? Surely if there are shy extroverts, there *must* be shy introverts as well? Also, what do you think the differences between a shy introvert and a shy extrovert would be?
 

·
Subterranean Homesick Alien
Joined
·
11,928 Posts
People keep on bringing up the idea of a shy extrovert, but what about shy introverts?
That's because people typically associate introversion with being reserved and extroversion with being outgoing. So if there's an extrovert who happens to be quiet or socially anxious, it's something that's thought of as odd.

Surely if there are shy extroverts, there *must* be shy introverts as well?
There are shy people of every type.

Also, what do you think the differences between a shy introvert and a shy extrovert would be?
First of all, the nature of extroversion and introversion are dependent on the cognitive functions of the particular type. So keep in mind that extroversion and introversion themselves will vary.
Second of all, shy is shy...I don't think there will be much of a difference. Actually, there may be. But I don't think it could be accounted for by any difference between introversion and extroversion. I'm not sure what the differences would be, but it could vary by type. I dunno.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,006 Posts
I bet a shy extrovert would suffer alot more than a shy introvert, although reserved vs social is a little different than being stimulated by the external world vs the internal, subjective state. Being extroverted does not mean you have to even like being around people, there are alot of other things in the external world that could stimulate an extrovert. Like I can imagine a Se dominant being stimulated by many exciting experiences in the wild away from people, peolpe just happen to be a good constant stimulation for alot of extroverts.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,678 Posts
I bet a shy extrovert would suffer alot more than a shy introvert, although reserved vs social is a little different than being stimulated by the external world vs the internal, subjective state. Being extroverted does not mean you have to even like being around people, there are alot of other things in the external world that could stimulate an extrovert. Like I can imagine a Se dominant being stimulated by many exciting experiences in the wild away from people, peolpe just happen to be a good constant stimulation for alot of extroverts.
This is why I'm always jealous of my introverted husband. He's not shy and he's comfortable in a group and even more comfortable by himself. I'm frustrated by myself and feel self conscious and often times uncomfortable and awkward in a group.
 
Joined
·
4,757 Posts
I find it interesting that when I lived with a shy extrovert, she and I had a lot the same behaviours - except I would be a lot more talkative and outgoing when I was in a small group/comfortable/talking in small seminar.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
26 Posts
This is why I'm always jealous of my introverted husband. He's not shy and he's comfortable in a group and even more comfortable by himself. I'm frustrated by myself and feel self conscious and often times uncomfortable and awkward in a group.
I'm an outgoing and appear very comfortable in groups, but I only appear it.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,728 Posts
a shy extravert is more likely to tell you that they are shy or feeling nervous imo

that's the only difference. there are different flavors of shyness, but introversion and extraversion play no role in how shy a person is.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
715 Posts
I'm really shy when I first meet someone...so I just tend to smile at the person and try to convey with my eyes, "I AM FRICKIN SCARED TO DEATH RIGHT NOW." :crying:
 

·
PerC Waiter
Joined
·
2,398 Posts
A shy Extravert would probably stress theirselves to open up around people than a shy Introvert. A shy Introvert would wear theirselves out trying to make themselves interact with other people, then just retreat into their minds. A shy Extravert would wear theirselves out, but keep trying because they really want it.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,977 Posts
Shy extroverts are probably more likely to feel bored and lonely when they're alone.

I've also met introverts who act really sociable, but feel drained after prolonged social interaction and need to recharge.

I feel bad for both kinds of people...
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
170 Posts
Let's get the basic difference out of the way: Extroverts need interaction with an energy source outside of themselves, usually in the form of socializing. Introverts spend energy when interacting with others will need a break, some sooner than others. This doesn't inherently make either group shy or not. It just means that two different ways of getting energy. It does not mean that an extrovert is necessarily a people person or that an introvert has no desire to be with people.

Now let's talk about the two different types of shy people, starting with the extroverts. I'm an extrovert, and there were periods in my life when I had some social anxiety, because I know that I was very weird and that I tended to talk too much. I was afraid that people might feel uncomfortable with my energy levels, and other such things that could go wrong. It's not that I didn't enjoy being around people, since they energized me. It's that I had low self-esteem and not a lot of social skills to begin with. This is especially true is an extrovert has Asperger's Syndrome, since they're neurologically handicapped when it comes to reading social queues, and it takes a lot of extra time to develop those skills. Many people with Asperger's Syndrome aren't shy and they plow ahead with their foot-in-mouth conversations, but others are more self-aware and don't want to put their handicap out on display, so because of all of that self-doubt they avoid contact with others, or getting too involved in group conversations. This is incredibly draining for them, and can lead to depression.

I would also say that it's possible for an extrovert to not be shy, but nonetheless be anti-social. The prime example that comes to my mind is Dean Winchester, an obvious extrovert who doesn't want a lot of people in his life. It's obvious that he's an extrovert, because he'll hang out with other people when he has to wind down, but due to his line of business, he's a bit hostile to most folk, and finds some rather extroverted ways of warding them off. I can also think of some ENTJs who get energy from the pursuit of something, and not from aimless social interaction. That is to say, they don't have time for meaningless relationships and only care about working with people with whom they can get things done. So there are many different types of introversion.

As for introverts, I think that this is much more intuitively obvious to grasp. They're often shy for the same reasons: they don't feel adequate enough to deserve socializing with others. It's simple social anxiety. Except you add on top of it that they have to spend energy to interact with other people, and it compounds the problem. The good news is that when they're alone, they do get a lot of energy. It's just that they don't have an easy time finding ways to channel that energy.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
489 Posts
I read on the internet that shyness is more common in introverts than extroverts. Whether this is true or not, I don't know. I used to be extremely shy but not so much anymore. It's sometimes hard for me to tell whether my actions are based on shyness or introversion.

Here are the differences I notice between my shy extroverted friend and I: When she is feeling shy, she will have a lot of nervous habits, such as: laughing awkwardly, telling people how shy she is, darting her eyes like a crazed squirrel. She just appears very anxious. Whereas when I'm feeling shy, I become like a statue. I don't talk, or move. I'm very stoic and robotic.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
5,301 Posts
I'm a shy introvert... Was VERY shy when I was a kid. Not as shy as I used to be now, of course. I am extremely shy in romantic relationships/going on a date with someone.
 
1 - 13 of 13 Posts
Top