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Similarities and Differences between INTP's and INFP's

42475 Views 33 Replies 21 Participants Last post by  narawithherthought
This year I had a wild experience of rooming in college with a fellow INFP. When I first met her I thought we had crazy similarities, we loved the same music, enjoyed the same classes, shared the same major, both liked photography, and were into writing. However, I soon found that our the way we perceived things was completely different. She based her opinions and made decisions solely on feelings (Strong Feeler) and everything I did was revolved around my thinking analysis of things (Strong Thinker). Although these differences caused a cross in communication and understanding at some points, after some time we came to know and understand how the other functioned and became quite the dynamic duo. We became best friends and did everything together, the only time spent apart was when we had to go to classes. With this being said, we would have the same exact day which would lead to us ultimately thinking about the same things, so much sometimes it was almost creepy. One of us would bring up something on their mind that had occurred and the other would confess to thinking about the same thing.. the only difference was the way we interpreted those thoughts. It's as if we were on parallel train tracks, the only difference being the energy fueling our trains.

..I thought it would be interesting to get some feedback from other INFP's who have been friends with INTP's or vice versa. Input would be lovely! :)
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my best friend is an INFP. We clicked really well right off the bat. I was always amazed at how much she seemed like me. But later I realized the differences... I get along better with her than anyone else, but also clashed more with her than any other friend. But I've learned what her buttons are, and how not to push them, and things have improved.
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The OP describes my experience with INTPs well, except the trains went off the tracks & collided at some point :crazy:. The INTPs could be emotional clods with a belligerent side, which does not come across as intelligent nor logical to me, and my sensitivity was too much at times for them to navigate (probably because they could not pick up on the early signals that they'd gone too far, & so they kept digging the hole deeper...).
How young? I relate to that, but I've also gotten better at being more sensitive, learning the signals and not going too far. :) But I look back when I started dating, and am amazed at the mistakes I made. LOL
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Infp friend: I don't know why you think that girl in our class is pretty. I think she's far from it.
Me: But she is! She has big round eyes, proportionate features... (this is basically me trying to set the table for a discussion & to invite her to present her evidence~)
Infp friend: See, this is why I don't argue with you. You always do this.
Me: o_o (at that time having no idea what 'this' means)
maybe you should have asked why she thought that first, and then said something like "I see what you mean, but I think....

I'm still learning about this too, but I think with alot of feelers, if theiir point-of-view is just dismissed out of hand like that, they get upset. I guess they want it to at least be acknowledged
I wasn't dismissing her POV, I was honestly expecting her to respond to my first statement with a counter statement of her own, so we could start a friendly debate... but I notice that with NF's, or just anyone in general, wording makes a lot of difference. So I should've said what you suggested, instead of just 'But she is!'
It didn't look like you were doing that to me either. But I've been learning to see things as feelers do. It's not just NFs either, I'd get into trouble with an ISFJ for the same reason. "why do you always have to make me feel stupid?" I guess they want to feel acknowledged before you go and counter them.
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