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So, my cousin(infp) is coming to the states to do a year of college. As we've been looking at housing options, my boyfriend (INTJ) recommended that I move into his new place (1000sq ft 2 bedroom) that way when she gets here she moves into the new room. Now, we all get along. I've been with him for almost 5 years and the infp and i (entp) habe always been very close. I'm just wondering what everyone elses thoughts are. Accident waiting to happen? Good solution? It would cut living costs dramatically, and then she'd habe easier access to rides from us.
 

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Totally agree. I know I won't mind, neither will the INTJ. I'm afraid the INFPs feeling might get hurt at some point. But then again, she's really used to me, so I'm not sure. I just can't easily relate to her point of view. She's excited and thinks she'll love it, but I don't know how sure I am that she fully understands how dismissive an INTJ can be :p
 

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Totally agree. I know I won't mind, neither will the INTJ. I'm afraid the INFPs feeling might get hurt at some point. But then again, she's really used to me, so I'm not sure. I just can't easily relate to her point of view. She's excited and thinks she'll love it, but I don't know how sure I am that she fully understands how dismissive an INTJ can be :p
If she's used to you, that's a good sign. Chances are if she understands that you don't intend her to take things personally, she might be able to figure out that she doesn't have to take your boyfriend so seriously either. I guess it depends on age and maturity though. I was a lot more hypersensitive when I was in my teens, but I've gotten better throughout my 20's.

I live with an ENTP and it's pretty chill. Bit messy (well actually a lot messy), but I just wait until it starts pissing me off and then I clean up. No harm done. But the only reason it's so easy is because we communicate - if your INFP knows that she can be open with you and that you will be open with her, that's the most important thing.

I actually had more trouble living with a bunch of Feelers (if I had to guess, 2 ESFP's and an INFJ). No one wanted to make any kind of agreements regarding chores, etc, because like, that would just feel so wrong among friends... And then when no one did anything, all the resentment built up and there was passive aggressiveness galore. DISASTER. In that situation I got pretty uptight about everything, and would have much preferred that we just did the boring, cold thing and do up weekly schedules.

Because it's going to be for a year, I think it would be a good idea to be clear on your expectations. Maybe leave it until after she's had a few days to settle in/get over the jetlag, but at least I always appreciate it when someone says, okay, this is how we do things, this is what we expect, how do you feel about this, do you have any suggestions, etc. That way she understands what the existing situation is, and knows how to adapt to it, but also feels like she has a bit of a say as well. This would also be an opportunity to warn her not to take things so personally, if that's your biggest worry. :)

Once you've got that boring stuff out of the way, she can relax because she knows where the boundaries are.

I don't really know any INTJ's so I can't tell you how an INFP would handle them. I suspect one of my INFP friends is married to an INTJ - I don't know him well but we've gotten along fine when we've hung out together as a group. My partner's mother might also be an INTJ... she's always been lovely to me but with the language barrier we don't really talk much, so I haven't seen her argumentative side (although I'm told it definitely exists). My gut feeling is that once your cousin figures out how your boyfriend ticks, she'll be fine with him.

Pay no mind to the excitement - it's a new situation so of course she'll be all hyped up about it. If she has any self-awareness she'll know she's being overly idealistic and will calm down eventually.
 

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I don't think the presence of an infp is going to do much harm. The only thing though is the third wheel phenonmenon. I once shared a place with a couple and it was hideous because I was always outvoted and it felt like I was boarding in someone else's home. It never felt like my home for an instant. Couples are bonded units, it's not at all like sharing with two other room-mates. She might actually feel really awkward living there especially in the times when you and your partner are having small disputes.

I personally would never share with a couple again.
 

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So, my cousin(infp) is coming to the states to do a year of college. As we've been looking at housing options, my boyfriend (INTJ) recommended that I move into his new place (1000sq ft 2 bedroom) that way when she gets here she moves into the new room. Now, we all get along. I've been with him for almost 5 years and the infp and i (entp) habe always been very close. I'm just wondering what everyone elses thoughts are. Accident waiting to happen? Good solution? It would cut living costs dramatically, and then she'd habe easier access to rides from us.
I am good with roommates when I feel like I belong
 

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As long as your INFP knows to be reasonably tidy, and have enough alone time (INFP or you two), should be fine. You could collaborate on a roommate charter if you want to avoid misunderstandings.
 

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It is a shame this happened 6 years ago, I'd love to hear how it turned out. Hopefully, hilarity ensued.
 
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