Oh man. I thought ENFJs were always out doing crazy stuff. I'm so ignorant about you guys.Dunno about other ENFJ's, but I'm online 90% of my spare time [but I'm kinda disadvantaged because of several life circumstances at the moment].
When I was healthy, I was either too busy working or where my friends were
My favourite past-times back in the good old days [in a chronological order]:
- Having an intimate encounter with a special friend at a coffee shop, or any other place with a calm, quiet ambience -- dim lighting, soft music ... gentle service ... not too many people ... not uppity, but not tacky either.
- Going for long drives either alone, or with someone I'm intimate with it. I like being in close quarters with a close friend.
- Smoking Cigars on the beach with the guys and enjoying the breeze and sound of the waves.
- Shooting pool with the guys at pool halls
- Dance Clubs [Not as much though]
- I really, really, really dislike large gatherings, parties and weddings, so even if I'm at those, I'm always at my absolute worst.
When I think about it, most of my 'hang outs' really depend on the company. I don't really care where I go, as long as I'm with someone else I care about deeply. I like to do certain things, of course [I have selfish interests as well] but I have a very flexible idea of what that is.
An intimate encounter outranks anything else in the world for me. The feeling of feeling close to someone is very important to me - and the relationship with them, as well as the ambience is extremely important for setting the 'right' mood.
Anywhere I can go where I can experience any kind of bonding experience with another person really calls out to me, where I can talk about myself, listen to his/her stories ... connect on a deeper level. Talk about futures, dreams ... share ambitions ..
Ugh ---- this'll probably sound cheesy and fake as hell ... but gazing into another person's soul and being "let in" into their world. Wow - that feeling is so powerful. And that feeling isn't just romantic for me --- though romantic in a platonic sense, if you know what I mean.
I have experienced such a friendship with 3 people in my life - and I cherish those memories. I hope to re-live those encounters with those friends at least once again in my life ---- but I don't think I'll ever see them. They're all in different parts of the world now - lost touch with one, another got married to some sort of a religious fanatic and had a huge fight with the third which I haven't resolved yet.
These days I try to connect through chat and email [since I'm isolated in NA without a licence, or a job which limits social interaction possibilities] ... Other than my SO [with whom I'm in an LDR], I honestly have been searching for a friend to talk to and I've had limited success in that regard - not that I'm complaining, of course.
I'm thinking about joining this community called "Toastmasters". They're a group of public speakers that get together once in a while and speak about various topics in front of each other and then test each others' public speaking skills. Might be a good place to meet like-minded people - and develop some key job-related skills in the process
I really recommend it, I was in Toastmasters for a year and the people are awesome and very supportive. It's a bunch of fun and no better place to get comfortable speaking.I'm thinking about joining this community called "Toastmasters".