i feel similarly, i wonder if it doesnt have more to do with 6w5 than it does with ISFJ (my ennaegram too)I understand everyone has anxiety issues to a degree but, after getting a better understanding of my MBIT, it makes me curious if it's more common for ISFJs to experience an unusual level of social anxiety?
It is so hard to explain, I will try... When people I don't know see or meet me, I have learned that a majority of them always gets the impression that I'm confident and intimidating (resting bitch face... sigh...). The reality though, is inside, I am an absolute mess who gets urked up and paranoid. The fact that I hate any sort of conflict, I feel the need to think extra carefully before speaking so I don't offend anyone (unless I'm provoked, then my defensive side takes over). Once I know my limit with the person, it gets a little easier to handle. That's only on good days though... sometimes, I fight so hard in my head to "keep it cool" I usually end up feeling like I just did something stupid, stumbling my words or say something without thinking and become paranoid I blew it. Sometimes I obsess over it the next day. Looking at people in the eye is a nightmare of it's own. It's easier on me to watch people for a bit to observe them before I even want them bothering with me. It's weird because I want to be everyone's friend but the fact I have my own issues, I don't want anyone to get the impression I'm some sort of burden. And although I do like to help people when I can, most of the "problems" are usually self inflicted selfish issues (drama) so, that also makes reaching out more difficult.
Pretty much, people exhaust me and I hate the fact it feels like work. I get envious when I see how certain people make socializing look as easy as breathing.
I am at my happy place when I am at home and I do avoid going out unless I absolutely have to. I do have a very small close group of close friends which are all coincidentally fellow introverts, ISTP, INTJ, INFP and INSJ. Not sure if that part is even relevant, lol.
Am I making any sense to anyone?