[Melanthe]

Sometimes when I take one of these tests, I score INFP, rather than INFJ. It seems to me that I really relate to INFJs, but I think when I'm exhausted or under a lot of stress, the answers are different.

When I really have exhausted my energy store, I become totally reclusive, and can't tolerate even much internet communication with others. I'll read what others have to say, but I don't want to communicate back. I lurk on forums, or read old emails, or log into my online game but just listen, don't talk to anyone. I won't answer the phone, or respond to emails, either.

I really am a "people" person, I just get exhausted. Usually it's stress that does this. Too many worries about money, or working too hard, or sudden changes in my life (like needing to move). The weather can affect me, too.

I have fibromyalgia (stress-related body problems are an INFJ trait, yes?) and so I have a lot of limitations that I've learned to live with. For instance, if I have a serious financial problem come up, I might sort it out in a few weeks, but I can be sick for a few months afterwards, with low-grade fevers, various body aches, or even an injury to a joint that takes a while to heal. If I've been taking a class, during those times, I'll have to cancel the classes. I'll stop meeting friends for dinner, I won't be able to take the kids to visit grandparents, etc. I have to change everything, until I'm through the physical situation.

Do any of you flipflop between INFJ and INFP? What seems to make the difference for you? What are the real differences between the two?

 

[Ramysa]

Yup, happens to me too. Here it says differences between the 2 personality types. Hope it can help you.

 

[Adriana]

When the INFJ is in a stressful situation, their initial reaction is "flight." How they do this is by "distancing" themselves from the situation, usually separating from the problem while buying time. They need to step back and consider what's going on. They tend to move away from what isn't liked, and sometimes even *stay* away from that. To others, it may look as if they are detached or are fleeing from the problem. But after they adjust to the situation, they will "face" the problem with a solution in hand. When there is conflict, the emotion they tend to express is "afraid."

(taken from INFJ or INFP? a closer look)

I think this fits your story.

 

[Melanthe]

Thanks, Ramysa!

That was extremely helpful. Definitely INFJ, except for the extroverted sensing. (But that is probably due to the fibromyalgia more than anything - everything hurts.)

 

[LiquidLight]

Sometimes when I take one of these tests, I score INFP, rather than INFJ. It seems to me that I really relate to INFJs, but I think when I'm exhausted or under a lot of stress, the answers are different.

When I really have exhausted my energy store, I become totally reclusive, and can't tolerate even much internet communication with others. I'll read what others have to say, but I don't want to communicate back. I lurk on forums, or read old emails, or log into my online game but just listen, don't talk to anyone. I won't answer the phone, or respond to emails, either.

I really am a "people" person, I just get exhausted. Usually it's stress that does this. Too many worries about money, or working too hard, or sudden changes in my life (like needing to move). The weather can affect me, too.

I have fibromyalgia (stress-related body problems are an INFJ trait, yes?) and so I have a lot of limitations that I've learned to live with. For instance, if I have a serious financial problem come up, I might sort it out in a few weeks, but I can be sick for a few months afterwards, with low-grade fevers, various body aches, or even an injury to a joint that takes a while to heal. If I've been taking a class, during those times, I'll have to cancel the classes. I'll stop meeting friends for dinner, I won't be able to take the kids to visit grandparents, etc. I have to change everything, until I'm through the physical situation.

Do any of you flipflop between INFJ and INFP? What seems to make the difference for you? What are the real differences between the two?

Yea you might actually even be like an ENFP or something else too, but also could be INFJ. The issues around sensation are definitely typical of Intuitives (INFJ, INTJ, ENFP, ENTP), but I get the sense of an outside case for ISFJ with you too.

 

[Jilau]

I'm like this too. I actually used to think that I was INFP, as I scored as it on various tests, before I realised that I was INFJ. Personally, I've suffered from depression for several years, which has made me seem like a P (Not expressing emotions a lot, being very messy). Nowadays, you can tell that I am a J, but whenever I find myself in stressful situations, I go back to my old P-like self.

One of my best friends is an INFP, and it's pretty much because of her that I can tell that I'm INFJ. First of all, we have a lot in common and can seem pretty alike. The biggest difference is probably that she doesn't really care what other people think about her, and don't get affected by their experiences and emotions unless they coincide with her own. She also seems to be able to block people out. I, on the other hand, am always aware of other people, on multiple levels. I can always tell when there are other people around, and I literally have to be alone to charge up. I'm also pretty good at putting myself in other people's shoes, and usually "know" how someone else perceives a situation, even if I don't really care about it.

I guess that since we have dominant intuition, which is our perceiving function obviously, a lot of us can come off as Ps. Could that be the reason?

 

[Melanthe]

Adriana, thanks.

This makes sense. I definitely do the "flight" thing. I go quiet and see what happens with the group, and watch behavior and listen and try to figure out the best path to pull everyone out of the conflict with minimal damage. And then I do so, not as a "leader", but I try to influence the apparent leaders in the conflict.

For instance, at a job, I saw the young CEO making the mistake of trusting people who were leading the company in a direction away from his ideals. I knew the CEO was brilliant and could make things happen the way they should, if he just stopped trusting these older people with impressive credentials, and trying to get consensus on everything. So, I spoke to a newly hired executive one evening after work and said something like, "He needs to remember this is not a democracy, and he is the leader and always has been." At the next company meeting, he said he was taking back the reigns and he used the phrase, "This is not a democracy." I could not have advised him myself - he probably would have listened, but I could not put myself in that position, but I knew how to make the change I wanted. I knew this executive would repeat what I'd said, as her own idea.

In another situation, I worked with a bunch of women who were in continual catfights, and the Alpha female was almost universally hated, but admired and the others all wanted her attention (which she rarely gave). I never took sides, I never participated. I read "War and Peace" during breaks, while they all stabbed each other in the back. If someone wanted to complain to me, I would listen, but never participate in the bashing. Very soon, the other women were inviting me to take a leading role in their projects, and the alpha female had made overtures to develop a personal friendship with me.

It's true, when conflict arises, I step way back. I can't see the point in getting pummeled, anyway. I am too sensitive to withstand much of that, actually.

 

[Melanthe]

One of my best friends is an INFP, and it's pretty much because of her that I can tell that I'm INFJ. First of all, we have a lot in common and can seem pretty alike. The biggest difference is probably that she doesn't really care what other people think about her, and don't get affected by their experiences and emotions unless they coincide with her own. She also seems to be able to block people out. I, on the other hand, am always aware of other people, on multiple levels. I can always tell when there are other people around, and I literally have to be alone to charge up. I'm also pretty good at putting myself in other people's shoes, and usually "know" how someone else perceives a situation, even if I don't really care about it.

Yeah, actually, one of my closest friends is an INFP, too. She can examine things right along with me, and that's what I love most about her. She doesn't seem to get tired of my capacity for analysing people (I think most people find it annoying after a while). But... she's colder than I am. She's not afraid to hurt someone's feelings, and can detach herself from being responsible for the emotional state of others. She has some guilt about it after the fact, but not so much as to actually keep her from cutting someone off if she doesn't want to listen to them anymore, or something like that.

She has better boundaries than I do, I think. I think it results in her being a happier, more comfortable person, actually.

 

[Jilau]

Yeah, actually, one of my closest friends is an INFP, too. She can examine things right along with me, and that's what I love most about her. She doesn't seem to get tired of my capacity for analysing people (I think most people find it annoying after a while). But... she's colder than I am. She's not afraid to hurt someone's feelings, and can detach herself from being responsible for the emotional state of others. She has some guilt about it after the fact, but not so much as to actually keep her from cutting someone off if she doesn't want to listen to them anymore, or something like that.

She has better boundaries than I do, I think. I think it results in her being a happier, more comfortable person, actually.

I get that feeling too. Damn those lucky FPs.

 

[Jazz0101]

I don't think INFP and INFJ are very much alike at all..Really just need to read the cognitive functions. I've only known a couple INFJ's and we are very different..For some reason its very easy for INFP's to score as INFJ's on online tests so I don't think they are very reliable..Lots of types 'withdraw' when under stress. I think thats pretty normal.

 

[LiquidLight]

Adriana, thanks.

This makes sense. I definitely do the "flight" thing. I go quiet and see what happens with the group, and watch behavior and listen and try to figure out the best path to pull everyone out of the conflict with minimal damage. And then I do so, not as a "leader", but I try to influence the apparent leaders in the conflict.

For instance, at a job, I saw the young CEO making the mistake of trusting people who were leading the company in a direction away from his ideals. I knew the CEO was brilliant and could make things happen the way they should, if he just stopped trusting these older people with impressive credentials, and trying to get consensus on everything. So, I spoke to a newly hired executive one evening after work and said something like, "He needs to remember this is not a democracy, and he is the leader and always has been." At the next company meeting, he said he was taking back the reigns and he used the phrase, "This is not a democracy." I could not have advised him myself - he probably would have listened, but I could not put myself in that position, but I knew how to make the change I wanted. I knew this executive would repeat what I'd said, as her own idea.

In another situation, I worked with a bunch of women who were in continual catfights, and the Alpha female was almost universally hated, but admired and the others all wanted her attention (which she rarely gave). I never took sides, I never participated. I read "War and Peace" during breaks, while they all stabbed each other in the back. If someone wanted to complain to me, I would listen, but never participate in the bashing. Very soon, the other women were inviting me to take a leading role in their projects, and the alpha female had made overtures to develop a personal friendship with me.

It's true, when conflict arises, I step way back. I can't see the point in getting pummeled, anyway. I am too sensitive to withstand much of that, actually.

Jesus INFJ.

 

[jd_]

I don't think INFP and INFJ are very much alike at all..Really just need to read the cognitive functions. I've only known a couple INFJ's and we are very different..For some reason its very easy for INFP's to score as INFJ's on online tests so I don't think they are very reliable..Lots of types 'withdraw' when under stress. I think thats pretty normal.

Correct, however, the Fe/Fi combo often works for conversational matters though, as long as it isn't a heated discussion about values or issues.

But of course the tests are flawed, might be more so for an INFJ as Introverted Intuition is a perceiving function itself.

 

[Ylajali]

I don't think INFP and INFJ are very much alike at all..Really just need to read the cognitive functions. I've only known a couple INFJ's and we are very different..For some reason its very easy for INFP's to score as INFJ's on online tests so I don't think they are very reliable..Lots of types 'withdraw' when under stress. I think thats pretty normal.

Exactly. This is very very basic.

This would be a more interesting thread if we got into the difference between judging and perceiving INFJs, since its obvious some of us are more interested in changing the world and others of us are more interested in pursuing our own imaginings.

 

[LiquidLight]

Exactly. This is very very basic.

This would be a more interesting thread if we got into the difference between judging and perceiving INFJs, since its obvious some of us are more interested in changing the world and others of us are more interested in pursuing our own imaginings.

Neither of which have anything to do with functions or Myers' J/P definitions. J/P is a behavioral theory (which is why people who don't fit the model like the OP get mistyped).

 

[Arclight]

Exactly. This is very very basic.

This would be a more interesting thread if we got into the difference between judging and perceiving INFJs, since its obvious some of us are more interested in changing the world and others of us are more interested in pursuing our own imaginings.

Hi.. You might find this helpful.

Myers Briggs Personality Types Code, page 2

 

[Ylajali]

Neither of which have anything to do with functions or Myers' J/P definitions. J/P is a behavioral theory (which is why people who don't fit the model like the OP get mistyped).

Yes, they actually do. Read Jung's Ni description. I think the J/P behavioral theory is very flawed, since I act like a perceiver but I use Ni. I agree it leads to mistyping.

Edit: I think it is flawed in regards to how it is tested. I understand that J and P are meant to correspond to the first extroverted function.

 

[Arclight]

Yes, they actually do. Read Jung's Ni description. I think the J/P behavioral theory is very flawed, since I act like a perceiver but I use Ni. I agree it leads to mistyping.

Seriously.. read this

For Introverted Types, it is an opposite flow of psychic energy. They direct their most favored mental function inward and therefore more readily show to the outside world their supportive or auxiliary function. So the four Introverted Types (I_ _ Js) whose dominant preference is a Perceiving function (which is introverted), orient their Auxiliary preference - which is Judging - to the outside world.

Myers Briggs Personality Types Code, page 2

 

[Alaya]

Yes, they actually do. Read Jung's Ni description. I think the J/P behavioral theory is very flawed, since I act like a perceiver but I use Ni. I agree it leads to mistyping.

Ni is a perceiving function.
INFJs are Ni-dominants.
Therefore INFJs are dominant perceivers.

The J only is there to tell us the orientation of the judging function, which in the case of the INFJs, is outwards(Fe). In other words, INFJs are Ps first, Js second.

 

[Ylajali]

Seriously.. read this



Myers Briggs Personality Types Code, page 2

I'm aware of how MBTI is set up to work.

My original point was off topic, but I thought interesting: How does use of Ni differ between INFJs to create two subtypes, one of which might more easily mistype as INxP? I'm going off the Jungian description of Ni, so I'm probably in the wrong forum here.

 

[LiquidLight]

I'm aware of how MBTI is set up to work.

My original point was off topic, but I thought interesting: How does use of Ni differ between INFJs to create two subtypes, one of which might more easily mistype as INxP? I'm going off the Jungian description of Ni, so I'm probably in the wrong forum here.

Because in MBTI J means "likes things decided" and P means "likes things open-ended." That is the problem. See if J/P actually pointed to J/P and not extraversion or a concept like "doesn't like things left open" it would be okay, but when we add the MBTI measure of J/P as "likes/doesn't like things decided" to the mix we run into big problems because now the assumption is that, for example, no INFJ will ever like things open ended, or no ESFP will ever want things decided (despite having tertiary Te). That's where the mistypes come from. Because MBTI sets up a paradigm, a model for behavior built around J/P and then doesn't allow for the possibility of say a "likes things decided" Fi-dom. In MBTI all Se-doms have to like things open ended (thus the P) and all Ni-doms have like things decided (thus the J), but real life surely is much muddier than this oversimplification. Why couldn't an INFJ want things open ended (a subtype like you ask)? Simply because Myers says so. This is why you get people coming on here saying "I can't be a J because my room is messy" and all this kind of stuff even if functionally they're clearly a Ni or Si-dominant.

I got into it another thread in much more detail but the MBTI is fundamentally built around judging and perceiving. And then they work backwards to make the functions work. It is not a function theory but rather a behavior theory that tries to use functions to back up its premises. But because the premise of J/P (or even E/I) are such vast overgeneralizations the theory falls apart quickly if you try to apply it to more than what it professes. MBTI is not psychology it is behavioral theory.

In MBTI INFJs aren't INFJs because they're Ni-doms. They're INFJs because they test as behavioral introverts, have an Intuition and Feeling preference and like things decided. But you can quickly see the assumptions that are made here (not to mention the backward way of inferring function use). What if the person was behaviorally outgoing and did not like things decided but was still a Ni-dom? MBTI doesn't allow for this and would instead type the person as an ENFP (which of course has no functions in common with INFJ). You see where the problem is in the testing methodology. It's not self-consistent.