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Discussion Starter #1
I thought I made a post yesterday but I couldn't find it, so here's a shorter version:

I often feel that I'm oblivious to my surroundings, in that I don't notice things going on in the outside world. It's disappointing because I admire when people are able to recall neat (seemingly insignificant) things such as the color of a person's eyes or the curve of a tree branch. I'm curious as to whether or not I could hone this skill of first recognizing my surroundings, and therefore being able to recall physical things of the world. I realize some people are born with an eidetic memory, but perhaps others can learn to remember things to some extent... or even to notice them in the first place.

Conversely, I think that my ability to focus on my internal word by ignoring distractions of the external is really useful in my skill at solving problems. When people call me out for staring into space, it's generally because I was deep in thought working on an issue.

I appreciate any thought or experiences y'all may have had with this struggle between the internal and external world. Can I have it both ways? Thoughts?

Thanks for reading!
 

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You might be experiencing a Ni / Ti loop. I would just try to be better at the things you are suggesting that you're not that great with. I'm really bad at remembering people's names. Therefore, when I meet a new person, I say their name out loud and also spell it in my mind. There are many different hacks to train yourself to grow in areas that you think you need to be better at. Journaling can also help to remember certain experiences. It is very easy to get stuck in our inner worlds. It is quite beneficial to explore our outer worlds from time to time. I'd work on utilizing Se and growing that function. I hope that helps!
 
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I know the feeling. I often am not completely aware of what is going on around me as well. I'm not really detail-oriented when it comes to my surroundings. People point things out to me that should be so obvious and I get embarrassed that I would miss something that's right in front of me. This is a skill that takes a lot of time to develop. Taking notes of the types of things you would like to remember could be helpful.
 
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Well the good news is as an individual with an INFJ preference you do have Se (extroverted sensing) in your functional stack. The bad news is... its at the bottom of four. So in theory, you could indeed start exercising Se like a muscle until you get better at using it. It would just take a lot of work. Of course, that begs the question "how do I do that?"

From my experience, you just do it. Se is basically the art of just doing and experiencing. So don't just look at the green blob on top of the brown cylinder. Study it! Look closely at it and observe the way the branches bend, the texture of the bark, the shape of the leaves, etc. Just start making a habit out of it. Essentially, quit asking why and start observing what. It'll amaze you the things that have gone unnoticed for so long.
 

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Welcome to the club :)

The only possibility I have found is making a game of it... Like studying body language science and then playing out exercises irl. It only works if there is a mental component that I'm actively challenging myself on, as that keeps re-prompting my focus. What was I looking for again? Oh yeah, pick out 3 body tells on that particular person.

Another is if I see something I want to remember, if I can, I sit down. Being still so I don't have physical distractions and giving extra time to purposely absorbing what I'm seeing, helps me remember what it looks like for a little while at least.

Other than tricks... My real advice is just to accept. Do what you do best
 
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Discussion Starter #6
I really think y'all all hit the nail on the head! I was (and somewhat still am) definitely in a loop. Sometimes I can stay out of it for a while but it definitely comes and goes. As was suggested, I do intend to accept what I'm best at and allow most of my time to be spent on that, but I definitely also want to study and practice ways to make little physical cues actually seem significant to me so that I can better recall the exterior world we all live in.

Thanks so much!
 
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