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There's nothing more condescending than people who tell me "I used to be like that/ I used to think like that but I don't anymore" after I express my feelings and thoughts on something that bothers me... because to them, you're too naive and hopeless. You're so cute and innocent, you'll never comprehend human behaviour.

All I then see is red, intense and flashing and I have to get the person out of my site.

They're too ignorant to grasp that others' think differently. Articulation gets me nowhere. I really hate that people, who can't get their act together, feel the need to give you advice. Are they really that blinded to their own shortcomings? Why would I ask for advice from someone who manipulates people to increase their self-esteem? Or someone who has a giant chip on their shoulder? Or someone who whines all the time?

I can't stand people who are self-absorbed that they miss all social cues. You do realise how brusque I'm being, right? Do I always have to put it bluntly? Can you not see that no one cares? Do you love the sound of your voice that much? How long do I have to listen to your moronic, narrow-minded spiel?

No, it's not about love, it's about human rights, you middle-class halfwit.






Oh, boy, that felt good.
 

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SX Confessions, Rants, Vents, Rages, Purges
~Unleash your SX. Let it rip, rant, and rage. Feel free to purge until you attain catharsis.~​
Confession: took me 'til I was almost 30 before I realized how to "control" my urges to mentally/emotionally connect with people.

Hmmm sx/sp rant: SX IS SO MUCH FUN SOMETIMES!!!

sx/sp vent: sx sucks so badly sometimes...

sx/sp rage: I worry too much sometimes! *rages?*

sx/sp purge: I'm so bad at this game...
 

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There's nothing more condescending than people who tell me "I used to be like that/ I used to think like that but I don't anymore" after I express my feelings and thoughts on something that bothers me... because to them, you're too naive and hopeless. You're so cute and innocent, you'll never comprehend human behaviour.

All I then see is red, intense and flashing and I have to get the person out of my site.

They're too ignorant to grasp that others' think differently. Articulation gets me nowhere. I really hate that people, who can't get their act together, feel the need to give you advice. Are they really that blinded to their own shortcomings? Why would I ask for advice from someone who manipulates people to increase their self-esteem? Or someone who has a giant chip on their shoulder? Or someone who whines all the time?

I can't stand people who are self-absorbed that they miss all social cues. You do realise how brusque I'm being, right? Do I always have to put it bluntly? Can you not see that no one cares? Do you love the sound of your voice that much? How long do I have to listen to your moronic, narrow-minded spiel?

No, it's not about love, it's about human rights, you middle-class halfwit.

Oh, boy, that felt good.
I know how you feel. At least, I used to. :laughing:

Seriously, a follow-up question on that -- if the person says that "they don't think that anymore" -- does it matter if the thing you're discussing, is something that bothers you, which you wish to overcome? (The person responding is trying to suggest *a way out* ?
And they're offering it "in case it helps" and not as "my way is the ONLY way to be" ?)

Also, can you flesh out a bit more on "articulation gets you nowhere?" As an INTJ (not an INFP, sorry!) I find articulating helps a LOT because before I articulate, I have to organize my thoughts -- and doing that either helps resolve the problem, or means that once I *do* tell someone else, they roll their eyes at me because the answer is SO. FREAKING. OBVIOUS. ("Why didn't YOU try that?" they always ask; and I have no socially acceptable answer.)

Also -- as in INTJ -- I'm not so self-absorbed that I miss all social cues: I miss the social cues even when I haven't said anything.
D'oh. :frustrating:

Enough "moronic narrow minded spiel."

Over and out.
 

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I know how you feel. At least, I used to. :laughing:

Seriously, a follow-up question on that -- if the person says that "they don't think that anymore" -- does it matter if the thing you're discussing, is something that bothers you, which you wish to overcome? (The person responding is trying to suggest *a way out* ?
And they're offering it "in case it helps" and not as "my way is the ONLY way to be" ?)
It's usually something that I want to overcome and their response is always a 'my way is the only way'.


Also, can you flesh out a bit more on "articulation gets you nowhere?" As an INTJ (not an INFP, sorry!) I find articulating helps a LOT because before I articulate, I have to organize my thoughts -- and doing that either helps resolve the problem, or means that once I *do* tell someone else, they roll their eyes at me because the answer is SO. FREAKING. OBVIOUS. ("Why didn't YOU try that?" they always ask; and I have no socially acceptable answer.)
I can always articulate how I feel when I'm angry but it's a case of Si-Fe vs Fi-Ne where Ne looks for other possibilities and how to fix the problem but Si sees the same solutions.
 

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There's nothing more condescending than people who tell me "I used to be like that/ I used to think like that but I don't anymore" after I express my feelings and thoughts on something that bothers me... because to them, you're too naive and hopeless. You're so cute and innocent, you'll never comprehend human behaviour.

All I then see is red, intense and flashing and I have to get the person out of my site.

They're too ignorant to grasp that others' think differently. Articulation gets me nowhere. I really hate that people, who can't get their act together, feel the need to give you advice. Are they really that blinded to their own shortcomings? Why would I ask for advice from someone who manipulates people to increase their self-esteem? Or someone who has a giant chip on their shoulder? Or someone who whines all the time?

I can't stand people who are self-absorbed that they miss all social cues. You do realise how brusque I'm being, right? Do I always have to put it bluntly? Can you not see that no one cares? Do you love the sound of your voice that much? How long do I have to listen to your moronic, narrow-minded spiel?

No, it's not about love, it's about human rights, you middle-class halfwit.






Oh, boy, that felt good.
The worst vice is advice.
 

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Confession: took me 'til I was almost 30 before I realized how to "control" my urges to mentally/emotionally connect with people.
I'm in the process of learning, but it's one hell of a struggle. Being an INTJ as well makes it worse since I naturally want to keep it all in, so it's like there's this huge war going on inside me whenever I talk to someone.
 

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took me a while to find this thread. :3

not an sx dom, but i do, often, feel that i desire, want, demand and need more intensity, involvement and passion than most people can provide. i recalled getting to know someone who while great in a lot of ways was just a bit too...lukewarm? lol for me ..and it made me cringe imagining being in a relationship with someone like that.

i am not looking for anything bordering emotional instability or some shit (my mother was abusive, insane and unstable, no thanks lol), but i do want powerful emotions, meeting me at my intensity or exceeding it, extreme closeness and lack of monotony. i don't like the idea of a relationship falling into routine. i want wild fires, poetry in flesh and blood, rage, serenity, turbulence ending in laughter or heightened intimacy, understanding to the point where you can revel in being so close to your partner that you can't tell where they start and you begin while still retaining your individuality, priorities and more.

i have always been very in control, rather stoic and self-contained especially where pain is concerned. and yet, i have an overwhelmingly (except for as @Animal, would say, those from the same planet...who can either exceed it or match me as i said) passionate personality and a tempestuous side that most people can't handle. all of what i described above is a requirement. after attempting to see how things would pan out if all else was more or less great but the intensity levels were mismatched, in a few cases, i've decided i'd rather be single than do without. it just doesn't-fuckin-work for me. period.
 

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:laughing:

Well... I'm throwing my hat on the ring *throws hat*

In less than 1 year; and, @LeoCat won't let me lie, I've found myself madly in love with over 5 or 6 different women; all of them completely opposite from one another, but... I loved them (sometimes 2 at the same time). I can't really help it, I've always had a poor impulse control; and, when someone gets in me, I pursue her madly and intensely. I've seen things rise, peak, crash and burn; all in less than 3 days. Tells a lot about me, huh?
 

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:laughing:

Well... I'm throwing my hat on the ring *throws hat*

In less than 1 year; and, @LeoCat won't let me lie, I've found myself madly in love with over 5 or 6 different women; all of them completely opposite from one another, but... I loved them (sometimes 2 at the same time). I can't really help it, I've always had a poor impulse control; and, when someone gets in me, I pursue her madly and intensely. I've seen things rise, peak, crash and burn; all in less than 3 days. Tells a lot about me, huh?
A. That's not love.

B. You're probably a 7.
 

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took me a while to find this thread. :3

not an sx dom, but i do, often, feel that i desire, want, demand and need more intensity, involvement and passion than most people can provide. i recalled getting to know someone who while great in a lot of ways was just a bit too...lukewarm? lol for me ..and it made me cringe imagining being in a relationship with someone like that.

i am not looking for anything bordering emotional instability or some shit (my mother was abusive, insane and unstable, no thanks lol), but i do want powerful emotions, meeting me at my intensity or exceeding it, extreme closeness and lack of monotony. i don't like the idea of a relationship falling into routine. i want wild fires, poetry in flesh and blood, rage, serenity, turbulence ending in laughter or heightened intimacy, understanding to the point where you can revel in being so close to your partner that you can't tell where they start and you begin while still retaining your individuality, priorities and more.

i have always been very in control, rather stoic and self-contained especially where pain is concerned. and yet, i have an overwhelmingly (except for as @Animal, would say, those from the same planet...who can either exceed it or match me as i said) passionate personality and a tempestuous side that most people can't handle. all of what i described above is a requirement. after attempting to see how things would pan out if all else was more or less great but the intensity levels were mismatched, in a few cases, i've decided i'd rather be single than do without. it just doesn't-fuckin-work for me. period.
Brilliantly put love.

I want to add, respect and wisdom is so important with that intensity.

I get bored so easily usually with a guy because they want my fiery self without showing respect and using wisdom involving me. I consider those most important thing. Because I can just as easily forget you exist, when you fuck up. I don't do trust unconditionally. It would be foolish to, even for the sake of a passionate encounter.
 

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Meh I've experienced the same and I am no seven.
OK? You can be sluts and whores all you want, but you can't equate lust with love. Regardless, my reasoning for him being a 7 had more to do with the fact only a 7 would be vain enough to use a quote authored by himself than it did with his experiences with women and "love".
 

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OK? You can be sluts and whores all you want, but you can't equate lust with love. Regardless, my reasoning for him being a 7 had more to do with the fact only a 7 would be vain enough to use a quote authored by himself than it did with his experiences with women and "love".
that's not true either. I highly enjoy using my own quotes if they're good enough, and I know other sixes who are the same way
 

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OK? You can be sluts and whores all you want,
I'm pretty sure they were referring to crushes & feelings, not having sex with multiple people. Just a hunch.. could be wrong. :)

Unless you're referring to emotional whores...?

but you can't equate lust with love.
True. This is one of my many pet peeves about our over-sexed, emotionally shallow culture.

(Disclaimer: I am not accusing the above posters of being over-sexed or emotionally shallow. Simply commenting on the idea. I know for one that @Arya is very aware of the difference between lust and love, so this would not apply to her, at least.)


I wrote this today on another forum about 'friend zone' complaints. And I think it qualifies as an SX-rant, and also my personal feelings about feelings, and love vs. lust.. etc. So I will copy it here:

__________

My problem with the whole "friend zone" label is that I need to be friends with someone before I want them. I'm heavily demisexual. I might feel inklings of chemistry with someone right away, but that needs to build before I have real desire to be with him.

No matter how attractive someone is, if he jumps the gun too quickly, I lose interest. I feel cornered and pressured and that is a turn-off. I also don't respond well to expectations. It's one thing to grow into each other, influence each other, change each other over time.. but another for someone to meet me and think I'm pretty and then immediately expect me to respond to him a certain way. My feelings need to evolve naturally. I don't owe someone my sexual attention just because he's drawn to me. If anything, he owes it to himself to put the time it takes to really get to know the woman he wants, and draw her in and show her how special she is.

The whole "fear of friendzone" thing is a symptom of a sick, oversexed culture in my opinion. It's also objectifying people, acting like you "wasted your time" if they decide they just want to be friends. The kind of man I would fall in love with is someone who invests in me and thinks I am worth his time whether things go the way he wants or not. Conversely, I would not deserve a wonderful man unless I was willing to invest some time in him, just to get to know him. If he turned out not wanting me, of course that would hurt, but I could still appreciate the time we spent getting to know each other.

A friendship is not an "ultimatum." A person is not a "goal." I think it should be pretty obvious whether there is chemistry there or not, and it takes time for two people to really grow to care about each other. If everyone weren't so overly concerned with rushing into bed with each other, this process itself, could be regarded as beautiful.. regardless of where it leads. Beyond that, the friendships that turned to relationships would be more likely to work out well.


Of course I hate rejection. Of course I hate it when I'm mad for a guy and he just sees me as a friend. I've been hurt in this way - badly - and it stung. I'm not taking away from that. But I still saw the time we spent together, as being worth it. Anyone I was truly interested in, was someone who had something to offer me, and our conversations or time spent together helped me to grow into a better person. (Which is why I liked him in the first place!) And in some cases, people I might have been initially drawn to, panned out into true friendship, music or creative partnerships, or other things. Because the mind-chemistry was there, and was real. I would never regard that process of true, deep connection as a "waste of time." Sex isn't everything.​



 

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Exactly. For some reason men seem to think if they admire your symmetry you owe them attention sexually. I also scoff when they try telling me they love me the day we met, I don't think so. Worshipping someone for your vision of who they are in that way, is an act of hatred too. Its dehumanizing.
 

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I would say the average woman is no better, with her shallow preoccupation with what cars men drive, and their resources available etc. To even the rant.

It makes me sad for both genders to be so trapped in their fears.
 
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