Personality Cafe banner
1 - 5 of 5 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
27 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
We all know that every person needs affection independently of their type. And that everyone feels emotions too.
1. Does being a Feeler or a Thinker have nothing to do with how you feel emotions and the intensity of such emotions?
2.Do thinking types need as much affection and display of such as feelers? And vice-versa.
3.Or are they pretty much comfortable just knowing they're cared about instead of actively being demonstrated so?
4. Do introverted feelers need them as much as other dominant/secondary extroverted feelers or is it something that can't be typed?
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
9,785 Posts
We all know that every person needs affection independently of their type. And that everyone feels emotions too.
1. Does being a Feeler or a Thinker have nothing to do with how you feel emotions and the intensity of such emotions?
2.Do thinking types need as much affection and display of such as feelers? And vice-versa.
3.Or are they pretty much comfortable just knowing they're cared about instead of actively being demonstrated so?
4. Do introverted feelers need them as much as other dominant/secondary extroverted feelers or is it something that can't be typed?
I think feelers are more open about it most of the time (especially ExFxs), but I know alot of very affectionate/needing affection Ts (especially INTPs).
Comparing me (ISFP) to an INTP I know:
1) Everyone feels emotion, but the expression of it is different.
2) Yes, from what I've seen.
3) I think nearly all types I've met need reassurance in a physical way.
4) Yes, but for me, I'm very very shy and awkward with it. The ESFJs I know are insanely open and obvious in their want of it.
 
  • Like
Reactions: mad

·
MOTM August 2012
Joined
·
3,467 Posts
We all know that every person needs affection independently of their type. And that everyone feels emotions too.
1. Does being a Feeler or a Thinker have nothing to do with how you feel emotions and the intensity of such emotions?
2.Do thinking types need as much affection and display of such as feelers? And vice-versa.
3.Or are they pretty much comfortable just knowing they're cared about instead of actively being demonstrated so?
4. Do introverted feelers need them as much as other dominant/secondary extroverted feelers or is it something that can't be typed?
1). No. Feeling is how you process or rationalize those emotions not the emotions themselves. Since emotions are often wrapped up in complexes (which are feeling-toned ideas) then the character of your complexes is the determinate of whether or not you have a strong emotional reaction to something (or even an affective or physiological reaction).

2) Yes. Potentially more in real life, because Thinking types generally have a very poorly developed Feeling function meaning their ability to rationalize their own emotional content might be underwhelming. Everyone has emotions, but the ability to filter emotions is handled by the Feeling function, so you can imagine someone with an underdeveloped Feeling function might struggle in the ability of handling their emotions.

3) Maybe outwardly, but again everyone's emotional needs are characteristic of their individual complexes. So it would be hard to say Thinking types are emotional in this way and Feeling types in that way.

4) Again hard to say. Again Feeling just tells us what to do with our emotions. They aren't the emotions themselves.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
4,382 Posts
Affection is a human need, so in itself, there is no correlation. That would be the same as saying that some types need food and shelter more than others - no type has an edge over any other on Maslow's hierarchy, since everyone has survival drives. That being said, it's all about expression and level of comfort in expressing affection that's going to be impacted by T/F - since affection is in the realm of feelings, high feelers who are better at speaking in a language of feeling will more likely have an easier time knowing when the right time and place to express affection is, and they'll probably have a more fluid, complex and creative command of this, since it's in the realm of feeling. However, depending on how they were raised and personal complexes, there's obviously going to be differences in attitude toward affection and different comfort levels in feelers, based on their views of it from this. T types definitely have a more black-and-white command of the feeling realm, so surely they'll probably have more comfort issues here based on type alone. I'm not going to give the PC answer that T types are going to be just as good as feelers with feelings, because it simply isn't true, especially if we're talking inferior F types. In the tert. and inferior form, control of feelings is definitely an issue, whereas this shouldn't be the case with higher F types, especially those with dominant F functions. Fi types keep their core feelings introverted predominately, so it's understandable that they might easily be awkward with feeling displays, although I think this would reflect them being uncomfortable with their own feelings about something in a deliberate way more than anything (they might hate feeling a certain way, so they'll actively avoid it), or might have to do with them being deliberately independent with them based on their values, etc. Knowing dominant Fi types, they definitely tend to be extremely conscious of their feelings, and how they choose to display them, and tend to feel that it is their right to do whatever they please with them based on values. Even Fe tert. and inferior types are likely to come off as more outwardly affectionate, since being Fe types, they'll probably just go by some more socially agreed-upon display of feeling to act from in a given situation to get by. Otherwise, @LiquidLight is completely on the ball with his point.
 
  • Like
Reactions: mad

·
MOTM July 2012
Joined
·
8,033 Posts
1. Does being a Feeler or a Thinker have nothing to do with how you feel emotions and the intensity of such emotions?
being a feeler or a thinker has nothing to do with how you feel emotions. feeler vs. thinker has to do with whether feeling-related or thinking-related values take priority in your decision-making. "feeling-related values" are not the same as feelings. everyone has feelings, although some people suppress them. "feeling-related values" are personal or social ethics. "thinking-related values" are logical consistency or principles.

2.Do thinking types need as much affection and display of such as feelers? And vice-versa.
love and affection are human needs shared by all types.

3.Or are they pretty much comfortable just knowing they're cared about instead of actively being demonstrated so?
everyone wants love demonstrated to them, but exactly how?...that depends on multiple factors, one of which would be a person's individual love language.

i don't know if this is generally true, but in my experience it appears that how we perceive love is partly related to our perceiving functions, and how we decide whether someone loves us or not has to do with our judging functions.

i say this because i've often seen sensors express/perceive love in practical, concrete, material ways and intuitives express/perceive love in nuanced, implied, creatively hinted ways...in no way is it limited to this however - intuitives can be direct and practical and sensors can be creative and poetic ~ it just seems to be the natural bent.

and i've seen thinkers presume the presence of love because it logically makes sense ('i'm still with her, so she should know i love her') and feelers assume they are loved because they feel loved in ways that match their personal social ethics ('love means you care enough to be there for someone when they need you, to talk with them when they want to talk, to hug and cuddle when you are feeling affectionate, etc.' and since he does all these things for me, i know he cares about me).

the fact is that humans naturally tend to dole out love to others in the same ways that we feel loved ourselves...unless we've learned enough about how others feel love, or the traditions for showing it, or what others expect of us, to revise our natural ways of expressing affection accordingly.

4. Do introverted feelers need them as much as other dominant/secondary extroverted feelers or is it something that can't be typed?
this cannot be typed. everyone of every type needs affection expressed to them - the need for expressed affection is equal across people. the "how?" is all that varies.

i can speak as an introverted feeler - i have a great need for expressed affection, no less than the extroverted feelers i know ~ :)
 
1 - 5 of 5 Posts
Top