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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I've always been very quiet and shy, and although I really enjoy conversation with the right people, I find it hard to talk to random people and engage them in conversation. I always feel like I have to have some reason or excuse to talk to someone new, and I usually just wait for someone to approach me. The funny thing is, I (for the most part) actually enjoy random people talking to me, I just don't randomly strike up conversations with people. I assume this is probably true of most INTPs, but recently I've been trying to break free from this mindset, it's just that I find it very hard. Is there any advice people can give me on being more assertive without fear of rejection?
 

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Small steps. Start with asking socially acceptable questions such as "Do you know what time it is?" "Do you know where ____ is?" to complete strangers. Try to make conversation with people you don't know well but aren't complete strangers, like friends of siblings or friends of friends. Work your way up to full conversations with complete strangers.

Don't worry if you fail some times or can't bring up the courage. Every step you take is a success, there are no failures.
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
Small steps. Start with asking socially acceptable questions such as "Do you know what time it is?" "Do you know where ____ is?" to complete strangers. Try to make conversation with people you don't know well but aren't complete strangers, like friends of siblings or friends of friends. Work your way up to full conversations with complete strangers.

Don't worry if you fail some times or can't bring up the courage. Every step you take is a success, there are no failures.
Hey, thanks for the advice.
 

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Can you parlay any of your hobbies into social situations? That's an easy way to talk to new people: you have common ground, safe topics, can just talk about the hobby if everything else fails.
 

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Discussion Starter · #6 ·
I'm still going through the same process. I'm still not good at starting conversations with people I don't know well, let alone complete strangers, but it has improved a lot.
This week I've been trying to talk to new people, and thankfully it's not as bad as I thought it would be. I'm still trying to get better at it though.

Can you parlay any of your hobbies into social situations? That's an easy way to talk to new people: you have common ground, safe topics, can just talk about the hobby if everything else fails.
That's a good idea, thanks!
 
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