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Hey Guys!

I had a fun chat with a few type-conscious people today, and one of the topics of discussion were types naturally prone to internal conflicts. The two that come to mind instantaneously are the male ESFJ and the female ESTJ. In case you're completely unfamiliar with the terminology, which I imagine most of you aren't, here's the quick rundown.

The temperament for these two types is SJ. In other words, the traditionalist. In the ESFJ male, the type says be nurturing, caring, the host of the world if you will, whereas the SJ says look at the predominant male archetype and assume it --> macho macho manly man, none of this F stuff! Conversely, the female ESTJ has the opposite problem, but you guys get the point by now.

Here's my question. Do you male ESFJ's out there feel this problem? And this is open to anyone, not just the male ESFJs. Maybe some of you have seen this manifest itself in the form of outwards overcompensation? Who knows, but I thought it would be an interesting topic of discussion.

Personally, I feel the internal conflict on occasion, and I think that in some ways I overcompensate by participating in a bunch of dangerous sports and kind of being the crazy guy, but I'm interested to hear what you guys and gals think.

Thanks for any and all contributions :)
 
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Interesting topic. As the daughter and granddaughter of female ESTJs, I'm inclined to think they're not particularly susceptible to it. These two, at least, are so traditionalist that as long as they're fulfilling their duties at home, work, and church they're utterly clueless to the fact that there's more to life than lining up ducks and shooting them down. *sigh* ;)

My experience with ESFJ guys is that the young ones can be conflicted by such high feeling and social sensitivity and can have a hard time finding their place, but the mature ones who have worked it out are the best men on earth. I'm not even exaggerating. :)
 

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Hahaha yes! I love your response petit, even I say that partially if not mostly because of that last sentence XD

Very good insights, it was my feeling that youth was a factor, but I think the biggest one is environment. Growing up in a household that consisted of INTJs, ESTJs, ENTJs, and ISTJs I was... erhmm... what's the phrase... scarred for life? LOL

I kid, I kid, but I do believe that that environment is what pushed me to do all the thrill seeking shenanigans, which, btw, I LOVE. In a weird way, I love that desire to fulfill the manly man stereotype, because while I don't think I overtly come off as some sort of testosterone junkie, I think it led me to discover a world of adrenaline pumping elation :)
 

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Hi bro. Yeah, I know what you mean.
I am a male ESFJ, mostly people who don't know me any at all or people who are very traditional(boys do not know feelings, they know "wrath" sort of guys) think I am either gay or silly. My parents support me and know what type or person I am, therefore they are interested in the fact that ESFJs know so much about emotion, body language and so on. They support me to the point that they try hard to help me out with psychology lectures and so on.

It is very common for me to interact quite well with girls and with people who are open minded enough to see that it is rather a type of socialising instead of another way to show "gayness".

But yes I know that people misunderstand it and a conflict starts. :)
 
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